My ex had really, really damaged me...

[Skyrim]

My girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me around 8 months ago now, and in that time we've been on and off, back together than not, fleeting to NC (she had a BF for some of this period, and was stuffing around with the guy she dumped me for, but claims it was nothing). Anyway, about 2 weeks ago after I deleted her from Facebook and decided to move on and not have any more games, she called me and started asking questions "are you seeing any other girls? hows your love life etc" and then suggested we meet up the next day, me not completly over her agreed and she came round. We ended up having sex and acting like a couple again, at the end of that day she said "lets just take things slow and see how they go, I'm free all next week so when ever you want to meet up just ask" Alright I thought, maybe this is it, but I was very wrong.

 

Out of the 7 days in that week, I saw her once, even though I'd asked to hang out on mutiple occasions, to which she either ignored me or just told me she just remembered she had plans and can't. She came round Friday night and stayed the night, she got here around 11pm after work and fell straight asleep so we didn't even get a chance to talk. In the morning after I'd done her a "favour" I went into get mine, I thought it would be fine due to the fact a week ago it was fine and I'd just given her an orgasm. She simply said "I'm not ready" I thought it was a bit off, as she would allow me to do her but her not me, I shook it off and respected her wishes. She also refused to kiss me, last week she couldn't get enough and all of a sudden she just "doesn't feel like it" Anyway, after this she got out of bed and started packing her things, I asked her where she was going and she said she was going down to the chemist for some pills. I got out of bed and said I'd walk down with her but she told me to stay at home, I asked why and she said the reason she lied about pills was because she actually wants to go down to get a pregnancy test because she thinks she may be pregnant because of our sex last week. I immeditaly told her I'm coming with her and not letting her go alone, but she told me to stay put that she wanted to do this alone, I respected her wishes again and stayed at home. The chemiest is only a 10 minute walk away.

 

2 hours past and she wasn't back so I texted her asking where she was and I'm worried about her, she didn't reply. I texted another 2 times to no reply. On the 4th try she replied "I'm at home" I asked her what the hell she was playing at and demanded an explanation. "I don't know! I'll talk to you about this later, I'm going to a party" I was absolutely furious she would ditch me like that, I know for a fact she didn't go down to the chemist and I'm pretty sure she didn't even go home. My gut feeling is telling me she went to the guys house who she'd been stuffing around with and left me for. Thats why she didn't want me to come round. Anyway moving on to exhibit C

 

This morning I sent her a message about how I feel used and that all these games have to stop, basically telling her its time to grow up and start thinking straight. She replied ignoring everything I'd written and claimed I was trying to point the finger on her. It was back and forth and bit but died down. I texted her later in the day asking if she would mind accompnying me to a College course session as I suffer bad anxiety attacks and was scared to go alone. She said she'd get back to me later in the day. She never did. Later in, a friend and I went down the street for a walk, we saw her with some friends "She was in town and didn't tell me? whats she playing at?" I thought to myself. So I picked up the phone and called her. She said she was in town for a friends party blah blah blah. I hung up and decided enough was enough. Not 10 minutes after that incident, her and her friends drove past and hurled abuse at me, I saw her sitting in the car. Then just as I was about to enter my house they drove past again blaring their car horn. She texted me "whats wrong?" And I immeditaly replied "whats wrong? you ignore me, were in town and never called to see if I wanted to meet up for a bit, you just drove past hurling abuse and blaring the car horn. If you care about me, or more specifically "us" then duck out for an hour and come talk to me about this. Its getting way out of hand and I can't take it anymore" she just replied "I'm celebration a friends 18th.." to which my last reply was "I bet you and your friends think driving past like that hurling abuse and blaring the horn was pretty clever... abusing someone who, not 2 days ago you told you "loved". I hope making me feel like complete **** has made you feel ontop of the world. I may be a little hard to deal with at times, but that was just way out of order. even more so since I've NEVER done anything like that to you, I would never dream of going to such lows. I hope it was worth it. You've really, really hurt me this time. And the worst part is you don't even care...I was nearly in tears there and then.. but who cares right?

 

I've come to my sense's now and realised I should have never evnen bothered with her, she's been leading me on and hurting me for months now.

 

Additional Info

 

When we first met she was such a sweet girl, very loving and caring. When she broke up with me she started going downhill, going out and getting drunk everynight and started playing around with my feelings. We broke up because of the guy she'd been stuffing around with, I found out that during our relationship she'd talked to him about them having sex and dating and what it'd be like. I confronted her about it and things took their natural course. And know I'm left with all things anxiety feeling, stress, worry and all sorts of stuff. I started to become a little paranoid after we'd broken up and now its gone off the charts. I don't know what to do.... is their anyone here who can offer some advice and comfort in this complete mess of a situation?...

 

P.S I have a feeling she'll get into contact within the next few days to try and say sorry....

[Chi townD]

How did those breadcrumbs taste? Ignore her, she's playing with you. She saw that you deleted every aspect of her in your life, and she had no way to track you. Thus, the phonecalls asking 20 questions. She has you where she wants you,feeling miserable and pining for her. Nice boost to her ego.

 

Go strict NC. You're probably right. She might reach out to you again. DO NOT RESPOND!!! If you feel like you have to, post here instead. People will walk you through this. Hang in there, dude!

[esteem-jam]

Its sort of harsh what Martinman said, but its true.

You owe her nothing. There are other girls who will be not like that.

You can be mean too, or so it would seem on the outside, if you cut all contact with her, but we know you are not mean, it will just be a solution to exclude this poison out of your life. Sadly, she does not see what se is doing to you, and if this goes on like that, nothing will change. You got to go other, better way, and she isnt on it, at least for the nearest decade. We are just waiting for your decision