Can the heart predict the future, or does it create a dilusion?

[SC]

If you are in a situation like I am in and am dying to get back with your ex, and you split up on amicable terms although something happens just after you split up that causes you to not talk to each other. Then you speak again after a couple of weeks about things unrelated to the relationship and generally enjoy talking. I don't know why, but I feel my heart is quietly confident that she may decide to accept me back if I talk to her about getting back together. However, in my mind I know that it is an uncertainty, and probably a long shot. Has your heart ever 'forseen' an event that you really want to happen, and it has or is it being dilusional and potentially harmful? I know I can fix our relationship, I know exactly what went wrong and why she called it off, and it was a stupid mistake on my part. I didn't necessarily do anything wrong, but I felt I put too much pressure on her to be in a long term relationship, and it pissed her off cos of my negativety, although i partly had reason to be even if I didn't do anything about it. My heart see's that if I highlight the fact that I won't be 'tying' her down and keeping things cool with each other, yet maintain a healthy relationship, even if its only till she goes away, and that I would like a second chance to prove to her what I have been proving to myself she will, although reluctantly at first accept me back. But I'm so scared its a dilusion. I love her, but I wasn't in love with her which I seemed to show. I just felt like I depended on her as a role model as I rejected my parents, and I realise now that this was a mistake. I want to convince her that this wont happen again as I am coping fine without her or them. Has anyone been through what I'm going through? How did it feel for you? What was the outcome? Do I have any hope?

[hurtingandconfused]

Has anyone been through what I'm going through?

Yes

How did it feel for you?

Like s***.

What was the outcome?

A better me; a better tomorrow.

Do I have any hope?

Hope for what?

 

I would like a second chance to prove to her what I have been proving to myself

You do not have to prove anything to her. Sometimes it's too late. Nothing that you will/can do will change her decision. When a woman makes a decision based on a relationship, it is FINAL.

 

I want to convince her that this wont happen again as I am coping fine without her or them

You cannot convince her. Let her be and if she comes back we'll then work your magic. Until then keep working on yourself and perhaps you will find someone new.

[SC]

Hope for what?

 

For a second chance

 

You do not have to prove anything to her. Sometimes it's too late. Nothing that you will/can do will change her decision. When a woman makes a decision based on a relationship, it is FINAL.

 

But you see, I do need to prove to her, I have a lot to prove to her. Even if its still futile, then at least she knows that I am not a loser, the way I was behaving which left a lot to be desired. I need the chance to show her my true nature again. At the moment we have just started talking again, but this was on Monday and we need to wait till Saturday when we will see each other in work again. I have failed to keep our relationship together. I know exactly why we split up, even if she just feels her feelings changed there was someone that I became that changed them, and it was both at the same time so it is not coincedence.

 

 

You cannot convince her. Let her be and if she comes back we'll then work your magic. Until then keep working on yourself and perhaps you will find someone new.

 

She is coming back, I hope. We made progress on monday, we just spoke over msn. Obviously I need more than just a computer interface, I need her to speak to. I don't want to say anything now, but if I was to have a second chance of showing both her and myself that I can make us happy then I will be the happiest man in the world and will not squander the chance. I feel like I need this, it sounds silly but if I were to meet someone else without this second chance I feel that I would more than likely repeat my mistakes because of the frustration of losing this relationship. OK, I could succeed, I don't need Rachel, but I want Rachel, and it would be a lot easier if I managed to achieve this goal first. Had circumstances been different (if we were a lot older and settled) I would more than likely have asked her to marry me. To me she wasn't a casual date, she meant a lot to me. It's not so easy to just let her go in the light of recent events, and the reason why we split up. Does one not deserve a second chance to put things right? She may want me back if I can prove to her all this. I just need the chance.

[lost_in_chgo]

Yes the heart foresees...

but more accurately, what is in your heart when she returns is what's important.

 

There can be bitterness, hatred, resentment or there can be love, willingness etc..

What your heart shows to her will determine the outcome if she comes back to you.

 

Leave the door open, and maybe you get what you want in the long run, or

maybe you change your mind.

 

Remember, she might not ever come back.

Though they usually do in some form or another, even if just for a look-see.

[LyricalZ]

Hi SC,

 

There is always hope... Where there's Will there's bound 2 b a Way...

 

Always go with Intuition... If ur intuition is void of the ego's desires, it is spot on...

 

Your heart and mind are used as filters - sometimes their choices can be inaccurate though.. Due to ego they will incorrectly judge a situation due to eg: past experience, or present desires leading to incorrect actions and outcomes... This can be negated if u get used to going with your intuition which is your clearest and safest place to get an answer which will lead to your higher betterment...

 

All the best and well b, Zaida.