smokey bear Posted December 24, 2011 Share Posted December 24, 2011 hehe he has emerged! I must admitt I am dying to know if she's hot at least! Ofcourse im hot!!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
leoc1973 Posted December 24, 2011 Share Posted December 24, 2011 Ofcourse im hot!!!!!! I don't believe you!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author wilsonx Posted December 24, 2011 Author Share Posted December 24, 2011 shes ok.... Link to post Share on other sites
leoc1973 Posted December 24, 2011 Share Posted December 24, 2011 shes ok.... oh she sent you a pic? you are so in! Link to post Share on other sites
smokey bear Posted December 24, 2011 Share Posted December 24, 2011 shes ok.... say bye bye to pity sex! Link to post Share on other sites
leoc1973 Posted December 24, 2011 Share Posted December 24, 2011 say bye bye to pity sex! wow well since you cut wilson off.... Link to post Share on other sites
lalalandman Posted December 24, 2011 Share Posted December 24, 2011 Maybe I'm missing something, but the advice that 2sunny is giving almost replicates the same advice I would expect to hear from you wilson. Am I confused? Link to post Share on other sites
leoc1973 Posted December 24, 2011 Share Posted December 24, 2011 yes it sounds exactly like wilson. I think wilson really tried to be that hardened guy that alpha male type personality and in the end his heart won out and he just cares too much for this girl. Its funny how a woman will take the strongest most hardened guy and turn him to mush. I think he needs to do this for his own peace of mind so that down the road he's not asking the what ifs. Link to post Share on other sites
Author wilsonx Posted December 24, 2011 Author Share Posted December 24, 2011 yes it sounds exactly like wilson. I think wilson really tried to be that hardened guy that alpha male type personality and in the end his heart won out and he just cares too much for this girl. Its funny how a woman will take the strongest most hardened guy and turn him to mush. I think he needs to do this for his own peace of mind so that down the road he's not asking the what ifs. Homebrew said it best, pain is lifes greatest teacher, when you learn to finally embrace it, you learn from it Link to post Share on other sites
Author wilsonx Posted December 25, 2011 Author Share Posted December 25, 2011 This is the most ****ing insane emotional roller coaster ride I have ever been on, 5 days straight love her to death want to get back together, past day, I want nothing to do with her, I cant believe she treated me the way she did even though I know she treated me the way she did. I feel absolutely insane. I tried explaining this to my dad and he keeps blaming her but its not her, its my brain extreme back and forth back and forth Link to post Share on other sites
Lis007 Posted December 25, 2011 Share Posted December 25, 2011 Hope faith love... Doubt fear rejection... Happiness and sadness... confusion! Wouldn't it be great if we could control it more!!! Its why i believe love is a choice and unconditional love can mean being patient, flexible, not having an answer for everything, being understanding, being forgiving. Then you are torn when you dont get anything back, you aren't treated with respect, you don't understand what they are thinking - no matter how hard you try, you feel lost, its hard to dream when you don't know what the future holds... I read somewhere that real unconditional love means you only want their happiness and if you really love them you accept that it might not be with you... its pretty tough to live it though. I can only sum up by saying its normal its how we make decisions we throw things back and forth, cause effect, effort result, protection vulnerability... are we strong or are we weak, will we survive will we not... the truth is everyday we go back and forth when we think about things... but what stops the back and forth is making a decision and then sticking with it. I guess my little rant of what I was thinking isnt particularly helpful but I am sure we all who are hoping and trying for reconciliation know exactly how you feel - like a pendulum!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
gibson Posted December 25, 2011 Share Posted December 25, 2011 The post above, is one of the most profound posts you will ever read on LS! Link to post Share on other sites
leoc1973 Posted December 25, 2011 Share Posted December 25, 2011 The post above, is one of the most profound posts you will ever read on LS! lol all over the place you mean? Yeah I think thats how a lot of us feel right about now though. The part I battle with myself over is the unconditional love meaning you want their happiness even if its with another person. I feel like my ex was the love of my life and I would have seriously took a bullet for her at one point. But I still don't want to see her fall in love with someone else. I guess maybe if I knew that she was going through this whole GIGS thing(if its even a real thing I don't know anymore) that if she really needed this for her own sanity and self growth but she would definitely be back then maybe I could see her with someone else knowing that there was a lesson to be learned. However, I just am having a hard time grasping that whole if you love some you wanna see them happy no matter what thing. Link to post Share on other sites
sardeen Posted December 26, 2011 Share Posted December 26, 2011 The creator of this thread really understands how I feel. There are many things wrong with no contact, well not with the idea, but the reasons people do it. You should not feel the need to ignore someone because it is a rule, do what feels right for you. Obviously you should not be excessive and may have to give up eventually, but if your heart tells you to reach out then at least do it once rather than holding it back because of some rule. The idea of ignoring someone or hiding your feelings when they do finally get back to you is another one I will never understand. If you truly loved this person, there is no sense in ignoring them and hurting them the same way they did to you. I know I will never hear from my ex again and have accepted it. Today made it more clear seeing how she once told me she puts aside differences on Christmas and talks to the ones she loved. She has been ignoring me for close to two months now. I sent a final letter and have just given up with trying to establish contact. If by some miracle she sees that I do not want her back and just want some closure, Im not going to try and make myself feel better by ignoring her, I will talk to her and explain how I feel about everything. If I need to cry, I will. Contrary to popular belief, it is not a sign of weakness to cry or to show you are hurt, but to hide those emotions to come across as strong is the true weakness. For those who were in a serious relationship, stop reading all this generic advice that would apply for brief relationships and do what feels right because you knew that person better than most. If your methods do not work it is either you screwed up really badly or that person obviously did not care about you as much as you did them. Link to post Share on other sites
Author wilsonx Posted December 26, 2011 Author Share Posted December 26, 2011 The creator of this thread really understands how I feel. There are many things wrong with no contact, well not with the idea, but the reasons people do it. You should not feel the need to ignore someone because it is a rule, do what feels right for you. Obviously you should not be excessive and may have to give up eventually, but if your heart tells you to reach out then at least do it once rather than holding it back because of some rule. The idea of ignoring someone or hiding your feelings when they do finally get back to you is another one I will never understand. If you truly loved this person, there is no sense in ignoring them and hurting them the same way they did to you. I know I will never hear from my ex again and have accepted it. Today made it more clear seeing how she once told me she puts aside differences on Christmas and talks to the ones she loved. She has been ignoring me for close to two months now. I sent a final letter and have just given up with trying to establish contact. If by some miracle she sees that I do not want her back and just want some closure, Im not going to try and make myself feel better by ignoring her, I will talk to her and explain how I feel about everything. If I need to cry, I will. Contrary to popular belief, it is not a sign of weakness to cry or to show you are hurt, but to hide those emotions to come across as strong is the true weakness. For those who were in a serious relationship, stop reading all this generic advice that would apply for brief relationships and do what feels right because you knew that person better than most. If your methods do not work it is either you screwed up really badly or that person obviously did not care about you as much as you did them. what.... im so lost Link to post Share on other sites
betterdeal Posted December 26, 2011 Share Posted December 26, 2011 wilsonx, What I was glad to see in this thread was you change from telling us "how it is" to "how you see it". There are many truths. One man's terrorist is another's freedom fighter. Even in courts of law, if all the witnesses tell the same story, they are believed to be lying. How we see things depends on where we are, and how we interpret what we see depends on what we've learnt, our nature, our language. We all seek to make sense of the world, such that what we sense, feel and think confirm each other. We like to have thoughts that confirm our feelings and feelings that confirm our senses. This is what being true to ourselves is about. By being in touch with our feelings, senses, and thoughts we can make decisions in our best interests. And even then, when we believe we it have all lined up, when we feel fully aware, we still make mistakes. We're humans, not gods. For me, this thread and your journey in it is not so much about your relationship with you ex as it is about you relationship with yourself, the world, and your reality. Hope you had a ripe old Christmas and here's to an excellent New Year! Link to post Share on other sites
smokey bear Posted December 26, 2011 Share Posted December 26, 2011 wilsonx, What I was glad to see in this thread was you change from telling us "how it is" to "how you see it". There are many truths. One man's terrorist is another's freedom fighter. Even in courts of law, if all the witnesses tell the same story, they are believed to be lying. How we see things depends on where we are, and how we interpret what we see depends on what we've learnt, our nature, our language. We all seek to make sense of the world, such that what we sense, feel and think confirm each other. We like to have thoughts that confirm our feelings and feelings that confirm our senses. This is what being true to ourselves is about. By being in touch with our feelings, senses, and thoughts we can make decisions in our best interests. And even then, when we believe we it have all lined up, when we feel fully aware, we still make mistakes. We're humans, not gods. For me, this thread and your journey in it is not so much about your relationship with you ex as it is about you relationship with yourself, the world, and your reality. Hope you had a ripe old Christmas and here's to an excellent New Year! I agree this thread is Wilsons break up journey and his gigs thread and his healing journal Link to post Share on other sites
Author wilsonx Posted December 26, 2011 Author Share Posted December 26, 2011 haha thanks bd, i had some growing up to do =) never stop growing Same to you man Happy incoming New Year may you get 1000 bitches in the new year Link to post Share on other sites
Forever Learning Posted December 27, 2011 Share Posted December 27, 2011 (edited) haha thanks bd, i had some growing up to do =) never stop growing Same to you man Happy incoming New Year may you get 1000 bitches in the new year Ha ha - that's what, almost 3 'bitches' a day, - you think you can handle that Better Deal? LOL If anyone could I'd bet on you, Better Deal, you spunky clever bloke you. *************************************************************************** Hang in there Wilsonx and all the best to you this year, may 2012 be your year for peace and happiness. Strangely enough, no need for me to wish that for you, it's actually all within your power, you need only make it so. It's how you define your happiness from day to day. Whenever we hinge our happiness on someone else, we hand over some of our power to having our own happiness, to them. Some of the happiest people I have ever read about are simple, spiritual, reflective folks, such as, for example, the Buddist monks. They are typically single and very attuned to self, nature, the Universe. I aspire to be like they are, in so far as my own inner happiness and inner peace. Not necessarily single, of course. But reflective, stable, peaceful, in harmony with my surroundings and my world, and most of all, happy. In a simple way. Simple happiness. Happiness I can find, and understand. Happiness that won't leave me nor is dependant on another's love for me. I have a long ways to go of course! And I do mean A LONG WAY. But that's ok, it's all good. It's not a race. I go at my own pace, and that is how the Universe would have it for me. God bless. Edited December 27, 2011 by Forever Learning Link to post Share on other sites
betterdeal Posted December 27, 2011 Share Posted December 27, 2011 haha thanks bd, i had some growing up to do =) never stop growing Jedi Knight, soon you will be. Same to you man Happy incoming New Year may you get 1000 bitches in the new year I'll opt for one lady if it's all the same Link to post Share on other sites
perfectlyflawed459 Posted December 27, 2011 Share Posted December 27, 2011 Hope faith love... Doubt fear rejection... Happiness and sadness... confusion! Wouldn't it be great if we could control it more!!! Its why i believe love is a choice and unconditional love can mean being patient, flexible, not having an answer for everything, being understanding, being forgiving. Then you are torn when you dont get anything back, you aren't treated with respect, you don't understand what they are thinking - no matter how hard you try, you feel lost, its hard to dream when you don't know what the future holds... I read somewhere that real unconditional love means you only want their happiness and if you really love them you accept that it might not be with you... its pretty tough to live it though. I can only sum up by saying its normal its how we make decisions we throw things back and forth, cause effect, effort result, protection vulnerability... are we strong or are we weak, will we survive will we not... the truth is everyday we go back and forth when we think about things... but what stops the back and forth is making a decision and then sticking with it. I guess my little rant of what I was thinking isnt particularly helpful but I am sure we all who are hoping and trying for reconciliation know exactly how you feel - like a pendulum!! I really like this post Link to post Share on other sites
Author wilsonx Posted December 27, 2011 Author Share Posted December 27, 2011 Hope faith love... Doubt fear rejection... Happiness and sadness... confusion! Wouldn't it be great if we could control it more!!! Its why i believe love is a choice and unconditional love can mean being patient, flexible, not having an answer for everything, being understanding, being forgiving. Then you are torn when you dont get anything back, you aren't treated with respect, you don't understand what they are thinking - no matter how hard you try, you feel lost, its hard to dream when you don't know what the future holds... I read somewhere that real unconditional love means you only want their happiness and if you really love them you accept that it might not be with you... its pretty tough to live it though. I can only sum up by saying its normal its how we make decisions we throw things back and forth, cause effect, effort result, protection vulnerability... are we strong or are we weak, will we survive will we not... the truth is everyday we go back and forth when we think about things... but what stops the back and forth is making a decision and then sticking with it. I guess my little rant of what I was thinking isnt particularly helpful but I am sure we all who are hoping and trying for reconciliation know exactly how you feel - like a pendulum!! I agree, this is one of the best post Ive read on LS... It describes how I feel almost everyday. I am still learning to control my emotions. For the longest time, I have never expressed them. I kept them tucked away. Now that they are out and about, I am learning how to keep them under control. I do not know how you women do it, it sucks. I know the outcome of my situation, the question is ask myself, am I ready? Thats the number 1 questions I ask everyday and then I go through what this quote says Link to post Share on other sites
Teuen101 Posted December 27, 2011 Share Posted December 27, 2011 Wilson I'm proud of you man you looked fear in the face and asked for a Big Mac super sized. I might not get my EX back and you might not get your ex back. I really dont want mine back at this point. the whole meeting them together changed my out look on the whole thing. I knew then she could make her self believe what ever she put her mind too and she has "shake and bake feelings" Thing is this look what you've learned about your self and who you are as a person and if no one gets it or understand its who cares you came away with a lesson that you can share to help otheres. I think your a blessing bro. dont get down and keep on giving good adivce to your friends you can never go wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
SoCal_Guy Posted December 28, 2011 Share Posted December 28, 2011 This thread is EPIC! Wilson, it's refreshing to see someone go after something they want. I'm like you in that regard. Your advice in some of my threads helped me look at my situation from a different perspective (one I needed), so many thanks. Best of luck to you! I wish I could tell you what will happen, but no one knows and life wouldn't be much fun if we knew what the future held for each of us. There's nothing like those crazy feelings when you're about to meet up with that person who still has you heart. Proof they don't go away with the flip of a switch or by reading some self-help book or this forum. They go away when they're supposed to. Link to post Share on other sites
jenny_ruthie09 Posted December 30, 2011 Share Posted December 30, 2011 Great Insights! It's really a struggle to find ourselves among the many chances placed before us and learn to live with the choices we made. End of the day, Wilson posted a good lesson, its not about our partners......... its about ourselves, the chances placed before us and the choices we make that we have to live with that really matters. End of the day, it's not who did wrong or who came in clean. It's the realization, that in your own right time and not anyone else's timeline you will arrive at a decision which is right for you. The only hope that we can hold on to is that the right person we want to be with is still in the same timeline as we are. I find myself contemplating on that pendelum post...... Going back and forth , wanting to but holding back. It takes time to heal from hurt, the timeline is ours alone to make. We must trully heal ourselves first before going back into full swing so we dont mislead ,and be ready for the right moment and the right person to come. A great 2012 to all! Link to post Share on other sites
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