Online dating.. people lying about who they are common? Hiding identities?

[irc333]

So you've been talking on the phone and texting this guy and he has yet to give you his real name? That's a bit strange isn't it? If he's the supposed hockey player and is so secretive about his identity why the hell is he on some internet dating site? So he's the hockey dude. Why is he just not saying it? He's got his pictures up on his profile, so just come out and say "I'm Wayne Gretzky." All seems off to me.

 

Yeah, there was this one woman that wouldn't even give me her first name....I said, "I told you mine, it's only fair" and she gave me some BS, "You didn't have to tell me yours, doesn't mean I have to tell you mine"

 

I mentioned, "Well, obviously you're hiding something"

 

She took her profile off shortly thereafter, was probably married or involved with someone.

[ShannonMI]

Well, I finally asked him about who he really is. A few nights ago he mentioned that I should come and visit him for a couple of days. I told him I would think about it but would feel better that he would come here. We exchanged texts and it got late.

 

The next day (last night) he texts me asking how my day is going. I asked him if he has facebook and we could use that to better get o know each other. He said he had to take it down due to THOUSANDS of people from the dating site adding him. I asked what that was about. I asked him if he was a crazy fan posing as the hockey player and capitalizing on someone else to gain popularity with women on the site.

 

He responded very dumbfounded.. He said that It was a holloween costume of the hockey player and he's not him. He said he's just very private and it takes awhile to open up. I told him I still felt somthing was off and asked him to put my mind at ease. I said to him "you invited me for a visit. take a pic of your ID and text it to me and I'll do the same so I at least know who I would be visiting". He said he can't because his phone and laptop "went for a swim"... I'm thinking "how are you texting me without a phone" but didn't call him on it.

 

I bascially ended it by telling him to contact me when he's ready to open up and gave him my email. He got really defensive and said that I was being rude and nobody has ever treated him that way I just did.

 

I'm sorry, but was I rude? Don't I have a right to know WHO I'm visiting? Wouldn't the secrets freak you out a little? Am I in the wrong? So, I'm sure I freaked him out by being too forward but I'm not flying to CANADA to visit a man if I don't really know who he is or even his last name. Something is way off here and I feel like it's his loss for not opening up.

 

BREATH.. ok.. sorry, was venting. feel better now. Thanks for reading.

Shady, shady. Well I'm glad you didn't decide to fly out and see him. He STILL can't give you his name which is very strange. Being private is one thing, but giving your name to someone you want to date should not be that big of a deal. Is he in witness protection or something?

 

And didn't you say you googled the hockey player and the pictures of the guy you were talking to matched the player? Maybe he really is the guy and just doesn't want to tell anyone. But why be on dating site then if you are so famous and value your privacy. Makes no sense.

 

It really is too bad because the guy is one hot piece. Oh well. I'm glad you are being smart about it and following your gut. Dude is shady!!!!

[ShannonMI]

Slim pickins where your at?

Yes slim pickins and also I appreciate a handsome man and that guy is handsome. Shady as f*ck but hot as f*ck too.:p

[SincereOnlineGuy]

Online dating.. people lying about who they are common? Hiding identities?

 

 

 

LOL - of course! You're on the internet.

 

 

Haven't you read the horror stories???

[orion1010]

Any guy hockey fan out there that can tell me if that's really him based on the link I shared on page two??

[orion1010]

Any guy hockey fans out there that can tell me if that's really him based on the link I shared on page two??

[lululucy]

Canadian here so I'm assuming that gives me as much credence as a male hockey fan.. that's not Darcy Tucker. Darcy looks much older than that, he hasn't aged well -- go youtube some interviews with him. Or his fight when he was playing for the Leafs against Ottawa, jumping into the bench to attack after the whistle was blown like an ass...

 

 

IN SHORT

that looks nothing like him.

Also the real Darcy Tucker is married with kids so that'd be a big ol' red flag. Plus he was a chump of a player so you dodged a bullet.

[orion1010]

Canadian here so I'm assuming that gives me as much credence as a male hockey fan.. that's not Darcy Tucker. Darcy looks much older than that, he hasn't aged well -- go youtube some interviews with him. Or his fight when he was playing for the Leafs against Ottawa, jumping into the bench to attack after the whistle was blown like an ass...

 

 

IN SHORT

that looks nothing like him.

Also the real Darcy Tucker is married with kids so that'd be a big ol' red flag. Plus he was a chump of a player so you dodged a bullet.

 

 

See! I called that guy out. I asked him if he's some crazy fan posing to trick women into it to capitalize on women guessing. Yeah, the guy is hot.. But I don't care how hot you are.. It's just strange. You don't invite a girl to visit you unless you can at least open up. Everything just seemed really "off" to me.

 

Also, he started a facebook fansite of himself b/c he had "thousands" of people trying to get to him on his "real" facebook he says. AKA under the name...august bruce.. using the same photos. On other sites, he calls himself an athlete.

 

I don't care if you're a rich ****ty hockey player, a good one, or just a normal person. It's rude to play games with people or try to make them think you're something you're not. Also, it's creepy to invite someone to visit you when I can't even see you're ID. Sorry, that was maybe something weird of me to ask but I'm not putting my life on the line to fly to a different country if you can't even show me your real name.

[Emilia]

See! I called that guy out. I asked him if he's some crazy fan posing to trick women into it to capitalize on women guessing. Yeah, the guy is hot.. But I don't care how hot you are.. It's just strange. You don't invite a girl to visit you unless you can at least open up. Everything just seemed really "off" to me.

 

Also, he started a facebook fansite of himself b/c he had "thousands" of people trying to get to him on his "real" facebook he says. AKA under the name...august bruce.. using the same photos. On other sites, he calls himself an athlete.

 

I don't care if you're a rich ****ty hockey player, a good one, or just a normal person. It's rude to play games with people or try to make them think you're something you're not. Also, it's creepy to invite someone to visit you when I can't even see you're ID. Sorry, that was maybe something weird of me to ask but I'm not putting my life on the line to fly to a different country if you can't even show me your real name.

 

You have to get out more.

 

It's extremely common for people to wear their sporting heroes' shirt with that person's name on. No-one in their right mind think that will get them laid more

 

He didn't even give you a fake name but his own, ie he didn't pretend to be someone else, you are just disappointed that he didn't turn into this rich hockey player.

 

Personally, I think he is the one that dodged the bullet and he was right, you were very rude to him.

[orion1010]

You have to get out more.

 

It's extremely common for people to wear their sporting heroes' shirt with that person's name on. No-one in their right mind think that will get them laid more

 

He didn't even give you a fake name but his own, ie he didn't pretend to be someone else, you are just disappointed that he didn't turn into this rich hockey player.

 

Personally, I think he is the one that dodged the bullet and he was right, you were very rude to him.

 

Saying I need to get out more and your tone in this post shows to me that you're the rude one.

 

First, living in Wisconsin and surrounded by Green Bay Packers fans and Brewers fans I'm fully aware of the behavior of of sports freaks and by what they wear I by no means think these men are trying to get laid. I never said anything about this guy getting laid.

 

Also you imply that I'm some gold digger.. You don't know me or you have no idea what's in my own bank account so you have no right to assume I only started this thread in hopes of landing myself some rich hockey player.

 

To me, his behavior is off for reasons I've already explained.

[ShannonMI]

See! I called that guy out. I asked him if he's some crazy fan posing to trick women into it to capitalize on women guessing. Yeah, the guy is hot.. But I don't care how hot you are.. It's just strange. You don't invite a girl to visit you unless you can at least open up. Everything just seemed really "off" to me.

 

Also, he started a facebook fansite of himself b/c he had "thousands" of people trying to get to him on his "real" facebook he says. AKA under the name...august bruce.. using the same photos. On other sites, he calls himself an athlete.

 

I don't care if you're a rich ****ty hockey player, a good one, or just a normal person. It's rude to play games with people or try to make them think you're something you're not. Also, it's creepy to invite someone to visit you when I can't even see you're ID. Sorry, that was maybe something weird of me to ask but I'm not putting my life on the line to fly to a different country if you can't even show me your real name.

So he's got a fan site of himself and he's not even famous? Hahahahahahahaha so he's shady AND full of himself. Yeah forget this guy. He sounds like such a weirdo. He's good looking, but he's strange. I'm not thinking he's a murderer or anything, but someone that guarded and strange has something to hide. No good.

[lululucy]

=

 

Also, he started a facebook fansite of himself b/c he had "thousands" of people trying to get to him on his "real" facebook he says. AKA under the name...august bruce.. using the same photos. On other sites, he calls himself an athlete. .

 

wtf

I just looked at that on FB -- 29 Likes! Wow dude. Just.. wow.

[thatone]

i agree that's not darcy tucker. but i don't think from what you're telling us that he ever suggested he was darcy tucker.

 

he could be the local golf pro and qualify as a "professional athlete".

 

the fact is you blew this way out of proportion by assuming/hoping he was darcy tucker and he just isn't. as for why he's looking for women in the states when he lives in toronto, who knows.

[orion1010]

i agree that's not darcy tucker. but i don't think from what you're telling us that he ever suggested he was darcy tucker.

 

he could be the local golf pro and qualify as a "professional athlete".

 

the fact is you blew this way out of proportion by assuming/hoping he was darcy tucker and he just isn't. as for why he's looking for women in the states when he lives in toronto, who knows.

 

You're right. He never said he was Tucker, but what gets me is that he wouldn't tell me who he is. Just a first name would have been a good start.

 

He was trying to get to know me and it felt lop sided b/c I told him my first name and shared a little about myself and he didn't try to give back. I was just creeped out or put off by him inviting me to visit so soon. So I pushed back and tried to get him to open up and he said "I hold my cards close to my chest". What is the point of being on a dating site if you're so NOT open to getting to know someone or letting people get to know you? This man assumed I'd just fly out there and visit the way he talked.

 

Also you make a good poing about him looking for a women in the US. Why do men look for women so far away from them? I've noticed some visitors looking at my profile in different countries or even different states.

[orion1010]

So he's got a fan site of himself and he's not even famous? Hahahahahahahaha so he's shady AND full of himself. Yeah forget this guy. He sounds like such a weirdo. He's good looking, but he's strange. I'm not thinking he's a murderer or anything, but someone that guarded and strange has something to hide. No good.

 

 

LOL.. I laughed at that too. I feel like he does have something to hide as well.

[bean1]

He does it because it works Maybe not on you, as you didn't go to see him, but I'm sure there are others that fall for it.

 

I wouldn't spend too much time trying to figure "those" people out - they just don't care and do these things because it works for them. That's probably existed since the dawn of time, it's human nature.

[ShannonMI]

i agree that's not darcy tucker. but i don't think from what you're telling us that he ever suggested he was darcy tucker.

 

he could be the local golf pro and qualify as a "professional athlete".

 

the fact is you blew this way out of proportion by assuming/hoping he was darcy tucker and he just isn't. as for why he's looking for women in the states when he lives in toronto, who knows.

The guy WOULDN'T EVEN GIVE HER A FIRST NAME!!! Did you not read the first post in this thread and her posts after that? She didn't blow anything out of proportion. I would be put off too if a guy I was communicating with and looking to date, wouldn't even give me his first name. It's shady and weird. And wanting her to fly out and visit him when he can't disclose BASIC, NORMAL information is ridiculous.

 

As for dating outside of his country...perhaps he just likes American girls. Could be as simple as that.

[thatone]

The guy WOULDN'T EVEN GIVE HER A FIRST NAME!!! Did you not read the first post in this thread and her posts after that? She didn't blow anything out of proportion. I would be put off too if a guy I was communicating with and looking to date, wouldn't even give me his first name. It's shady and weird. And wanting her to fly out and visit him when he can't disclose BASIC, NORMAL information is ridiculous.

 

As for dating outside of his country...perhaps he just likes American girls. Could be as simple as that.

 

i got the impression that she assumed he was darcy tucker because of the pic. she said he seemed surprised that she would ask the question.

[ShannonMI]

i got the impression that she assumed he was darcy tucker because of the pic. she said he seemed surprised that she would ask the question.

She may have assumed that he was the hockey dude at first, but when the guy wouldn't even give her his name, she got weirded out. With good reason. I don't think it has anything to do with him NOT being the hockey player. She probably would have dated him regardless. But him being so guarded that he can't even give a name turned her off. I don't blame her one bit. I would be the same way. And I certainly wouldn't fly to see his ass. Yeah he's hot as hell, but he's a weirdo. He's got some facebook page set up for all his "fans" and he uses a fake name for that too. Something is strange about the guy and it's good she realized it before she met up with him.

[chryssy83]

He's probably married or something. Seems shady. And I think it's a huge red flag if you ask someone to tell you more about him and he starts being mean/making accusations.

 

That happened to me once on a dating site---guy said I am a liar and a narcissist because I looked him up online and found out that he had a bunch of bad debts and two homes in foreclosure. I told him (honestly) that I don't think we would be compatible because I saw those things online and felt that he was less conservative than I am financially. He already said he was self-employed and loved exploring new business opportunities. I'm a serious saver, he obviously is a serious risk-taker....and that's a deal-breaker for me.

 

I was looking for criminal convictions, not financial information....so I don't think I'm just crazy. But even if he said I was crazy/nosy that would have made so much more sense than calling me a liar/narcissist. I did not lie about anything! I think guys who lash out like that when you are being honest and trying to communicate about something that concerns you obviously have something to hide.

 

I'm glad you didn't go see him.

[lululucy]

And I certainly wouldn't fly to see his ass. Yeah he's hot as hell, but he's a weirdo. He's got some facebook page set up for all his "fans" and he uses a fake name for that too. Something is strange about the guy and it's good she realized it before she met up with him.

 

Yeah, all 29 of his fans.. I was thinking of joining the group

 

He's just a weirdo. Good dodge, I'd say.

 

 

Really? I live in Canada and play a lot of pick up hockey. I never see anyone over 14 years old wearing a jersey with the name of their favorite hockey player on it. Perhaps folks in the USA do it but in Canada it's gals who do this. There might be a a 'number'... but wearing another guy's name would be kind of gay.

 

<-- also canadian

I think I know two dudes with names (not their own) on the back of the jersey -- one's a Gretzky one from his Oiler days, and one is a Fehr one (the Jets), hometown pride. Otherwise yeah, I'd definitely agree that it's mostly girls who put the player's name on the back of the jersey. Guy are more likely to put his own last name (or an inside joke) on the back.

[mtber75]

I'm on a popular dating site and noticed that a guy was checking out my profile. I was drawn to his profile because his profile picture was of him on a horse and I've owned and love horses. So I click on his page and view more of his pics. One was of him wearing a jersey of a popular professional hockey team. A last name was on the jersey so a few days later, I googled it.

 

I guess he is a recently retired hocky player. We IM'd each other on the site and he gave me his number and I gave him mine. On Thursday we talked on the phone and have been texting since.

 

The think is, he is going by a false name and does not mention at all what he does or says what his real name is. Doing a reverse phone number lookup, it matches up where the "real" hockey player lives. Should I just chalk this up as some crazy fan posing to be him which would mean this person is strange/crazy? Or should I go along with his lies if it really is him?

 

I'm not sure how to handle this. His texts and our conversations have been sweet and he seems really nice but I'm not sure really who this person really is?? What should I do?

 

 

The guy is just a poser! Go with your gut feeling and loose him! He'll probably be stalking you if you guys meet!