BigDumbFoot Posted December 3, 2011 Share Posted December 3, 2011 So i find that I'm subconsciously trying to set limits on myself for my healing. Like, if i start to feel sad/depressed, a voice in my head says "what? You're really still sad about this?? Most people would be over this by now. You've got to move on!" It's amazing how incredibly hard on myself I can be. I understand intellectually that I need to experience this pain, but there's that little critic that just likes to rush things. He expects perfection at every turn and has no patience for grieving. I hate him.. I'm thinking of calling him Chad because I hate the name Chad. But I digress. It's so hard for me to go easy on myself in all of this. I need to heal! And that means, that I need to feel what I'm feelings. If I'm sad I need to cry, if I'm pissed I need to scream/hit the bed/hit the steering wheel. Stifling my emotions is just going to end up doing a lot of damage to my psyche I think. Who else feels like their subconscious is setting limits on their ability to heal? Link to post Share on other sites
BrettLost Posted December 4, 2011 Share Posted December 4, 2011 BigDumbFoot, Your mind can be a powerful tool, or your worst enemy. There are times when I weigh up where I "think" I should be at this point post marriage. Most friends/people just dont get it. Their attempts to comfort me are usually noble, and appreciated, but they virtually glide off the back of a duck like water. It's kinda bi-polar. Sometimes I feel incredibly positive, and assure myself that, yes, I AM healing, I WILL get through this. But then a day of rememberence brings sadness and surely depression does follow and can last up to a few days. This is when friends try to "step in" and give u help when all I need is own space to deal with it internally. In turn, they feel their efforts are being neglected and thus these relationships feel the strain too. In the end you can only live day to day and not restrict what u feel at any given time (like u said). My ratio used to be 95-5, pain-heal. Id say its about 40-60 now. So slowly, positivity is winning out. Link to post Share on other sites
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