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Being the OW - GONE SO WRONG!! A baby born........now what?


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AmyGiff1234

Alright - here it goes - I have had an affair for over 4 years with a VERY close family friend. It is complicated - see we are close to his family (wife, in-laws, etc.) and so we would see each other every day. We started out as friends - YEAH who doesnt in these siutations - and then realized we had SOOO much in common and HELPED each other with our personal problems. Well - we became intimate and well - now here I am 4 years later - not only heart broken - but raising a 2 year old that belongs to him. Well - I let the cat out of th bag and if I tell you ALL HELL broke loose - That is just the bginning. My husband was actually VERY understanding - but the sad part is - I am not sure that is what I really wanted. Now his family and wife - they are a mess - as to be expected. Well - we have kept incontact over the course of all this - and we STILL have this urge to meet! When he hangs up he still says ILU. We LOVE and want to be together - but I guess because of circumstances - it is all sooo very wrong! Well my concern is my child. I asked what he wanted to do and he said he wants to try and keep his realtionship. Can you tell me WHY men stay with their wives when even their wives treat them like crap and they are not happy!!!

 

I am trying to find a way to break it off with him - it is a STRUGGLE!!!! I think about him constantly - and so does he about me. He doenst want to involve the child right now - I dont know - HELP!!!!

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bluechocolate

My husband was actually VERY understanding - but the sad part is - I am not sure that is what I really wanted.

 

Well aren't you lucky he was? Given that the other man has decided to stay with his wife you would have found yourself alone & with the child.

 

It sounds to me like you let the cat out of the bag to force your husband into leaving you so that you could be free to pursue this family friend. If that is the case then it was very cowardly of you & it back fired, didn't it?

 

Regardless, unless you're willing to work on your marriage, and that means ending the affair, then you should do the right thing & leave your husband.

 

Can you tell me WHY men stay with their wives when even their wives treat them like crap and they are not happy!!!

 

No. You'll have to ask him that question.

 

He doenst want to involve the child right now

 

How very responsible of him! Is he paying child support? And what on earth does that mean? The child is there. When exactly is the "right time" to involve the child?

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EnigmaXOXO
Can you tell me WHY men stay with their wives when even their wives treat them like crap and they are not happy!!!

 

For the same reason wives have affairs but stay with their husbands even when they are not happy.

 

We reap what we sow. :(

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