After 3 months, can I assume he's not interested in being more than friends?

[antebellum]

I met this guy when I started college, and I really like him. We've become friends and talk sometimes, even though we don't have any classes together. He's pretty great. Every time I see him he gives me a hug. For a while I thought he might have been interested in me. He asked me about my relationship status, one time (only about a week ago) he walked me back to my dorm and came in to talk for a while (and asked if I was ticklish, lol), and after he hugs me he sometimes will keep his hands on my arms or waist. I guess I took all those, put together, as a possible signal of interest. But three months in, he hasn't given me any stronger signals than these. If he was interested, he would have somehow made it clear by now, wouldn't he? Should I just assume he isn't interested?

[somedude81]

So just last week he asked you about your relationship status?

 

How did you answer and what was his reply?

 

Sounds like he does like you, but he's shy and or afraid you'll reject him. Give him some hints that you wouldn't.

[antebellum]

No unfortunately, that was a month or so ago that he was asking about my relationship status. A week ago was when he walked me back to my dorm and hung out for half an hour or so to chat.

 

The relationship status thing was when my Facebook status went from "in a relationship" to "single" back to "in a relationship" very quickly. He wanted to know what was up with that. My relationship at that time was on the rocks, obviously, and I hadn't been happy in it for a long time. We ended up talking about relationships a little bit; he said he wasn't sure if he wanted to date any more, but he also kinda made it sound like the right girl could change his mind. I did end up breaking up for good (and am much happier for it) and the guy I like knows that I am now single.

 

I think I ought to add that this guy is a very huggy, touchy-feely person, so even though he hugs me all the time, I don't know if that necessarily means anything. I don't know if he does the little holding-the-waist thing with other people besides me though.

[Way2blue]

Sounds like he is courting you the old fashioned way. He may be trying to build a strong foundation as a friend before he gets romantically involved. Guys who rush in are trying to control you. Be patient. If it's meant to be it will happen naturally. Make sure you don't allow yourself to become a FWB, however.

[antebellum]

Thanks for your answer, Way2blue. That does make sense. He seems like exactly the kind of guy who would do the old-fashioned type of courting thing. (He's also not a FWB kind of person, so I don't need to worry about that.) I do think it is a good thing to become friends with a person before going farther, so maybe I ought to be happy about this. Sure hope you are right.

[MikeyBe]

No I wouldn't assume that.

 

Sometimes people are friends for years before they tell each other how they feel. (sometimes never )