BigDumbFoot Posted December 5, 2011 Share Posted December 5, 2011 So there's girl that I've been talking to for about a week or so. Suddenly two nights ago she sends me a message asking if I'd like to join her for coffee. I said I'd call her and let her know when I would be available. The thing is I don't know if I can do it. I mean I wouldn't mind going out as a friend, but the whole concept of dating right now just freaks me out big time. But the thing is, no matter how much time passed since my BU I would still be incredibly nervous. Truthfully, I've never dated before. Me and my ex met in college and hooked up right away, so I've never had to experience the fun (and drudgery) of the dating world. I'm not sure what I should do. I don't want to blow her off, she seems really nice and we get along pretty well. But I don't think I'm ready to be 'seeing' anyone right now. I'm thinking that I'll just treat it like I'm going out and getting to know someone as a friend, nothing more than that. Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted December 5, 2011 Share Posted December 5, 2011 Thoughts? Just do it.... Good for you.... Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted December 5, 2011 Share Posted December 5, 2011 I think you're reading WAY TOO MUCH into it. It's just coffee and maybe a bite to eat. Not marriage and a home with a white picket fence and 2.5 kids. Go out...ENJOY yourself! ENJOY her company. Have a few laughs! And if you feel comfortable with that, then do it again sometime! Link to post Share on other sites
Renard99 Posted December 5, 2011 Share Posted December 5, 2011 As Chi TownD says, just go out for coffee as if you were going as a friend. Don't read too much into what is going on and just try and enjoy her company. If you start acting a little strange you may alienate her as a friend even if nothing else goes on between you. I say just continue to treat her as a friend and if something occurs naturally and it feels right, just go with it. If it doesn't feel right, then you know you're not ready. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BigDumbFoot Posted December 5, 2011 Author Share Posted December 5, 2011 Haha, I always do this! I'm such a bundle of nerves that I always blow things way out of proportion. You guys are right. It doesn't have to be anything more serious then friendship. I'm still afraid of acting needy though. If you guys were in my shoes wouldn't you be afraid of the same things? Especially so soon after having your heart broken? Thanks for the replies! Link to post Share on other sites
davesterr Posted December 5, 2011 Share Posted December 5, 2011 you won't be needy unless you replace her for your ex. i mean this is just a girl you know , who wants to have a drink. thats all , a drink. just go and have fun and see how it goes. whatever happens from there , time will tell. and besides im pretty sure u wont seem needy since you are still attached to ur ex so it's not like u will be asking her out again right away or call her 24/7 really just get a drink and see whatever happens. dont think. just do. Link to post Share on other sites
neghitzbrah Posted December 5, 2011 Share Posted December 5, 2011 Go for it bigfoot. It's a harmless cup of coffee. See how it goes. Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted December 5, 2011 Share Posted December 5, 2011 Haha, I always do this! I'm such a bundle of nerves that I always blow things way out of proportion. You guys are right. It doesn't have to be anything more serious then friendship. I'm still afraid of acting needy though. If you guys were in my shoes wouldn't you be afraid of the same things? Especially so soon after having your heart broken? Thanks for the replies! LOL!!! Okay...breath! Just go out and have a good time. Are you nervous? Sure! THAT'S NORMAL!!! But, once you relax and just be yourself, you'll enjoy yourself. And if the chemistry's there, then after the date you'll know it's there because you'll have a hard time waiting to see her again. And if it isn't there, at least you got out, did something different and met someone that could be a really good friend to you. So, relax! It's a win-win situation. Link to post Share on other sites
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