YouNeverKnow86 Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 YouNeverKnow- how did you feel when the ex showed up? Angry? I hope you treated the ex like ****e. What goes around, comes around. I was much younger and it was all new to me so I gave her the benefit of doubt and was nice to her. I also have a big heart and at the time I still wanted my ex. The funny thing is that my whole mindset changed right on the dot. I thought/wanted that ex for over a year and let me tell you things really can change once you get them back. We ended up hooking up and I just wasn't that into her anymore......Have you ever seen "Forgetting Sarah Marshall?" The same thing happened to me, she caused me so much pain that once I had her again I realized it really wasn't what I wanted. I remember her leaving my house and it hit me, wow I have really moved on. Now I am experiencing the same emotions with this current ex but it does feel a little more intense. The thing is that I am so much wiser now that I really don't know how I would react if she did come back or contact me. I feel much more betrayed and disrespected. I also wonder if the same thing would happen to me again.......... Link to post Share on other sites
Author mike588 Posted December 11, 2011 Author Share Posted December 11, 2011 I was much younger and it was all new to me so I gave her the benefit of doubt and was nice to her. I also have a big heart and at the time I still wanted my ex. The funny thing is that my whole mindset changed right on the dot. I thought/wanted that ex for over a year and let me tell you things really can change once you get them back. We ended up hooking up and I just wasn't that into her anymore......Have you ever seen "Forgetting Sarah Marshall?" The same thing happened to me, she caused me so much pain that once I had her again I realized it really wasn't what I wanted. I remember her leaving my house and it hit me, wow I have really moved on. Now I am experiencing the same emotions with this current ex but it does feel a little more intense. The thing is that I am so much wiser now that I really don't know how I would react if she did come back or contact me. I feel much more betrayed and disrespected. I also wonder if the same thing would happen to me again.......... Ahhh I know how you feel,, I sooo wanted my ex. back at 1st but now that my emotions have setteled down and am looking at it in a different way I also don't know how I'd react if my ex. came back because of the disrespect and betrayel,, funny what time and N.C. can do. Link to post Share on other sites
Sugarkane Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 Yes I have seen that movie a couple of times! I thought it was pretty spot on when it cones to being the dumpee. I always remember how he's curled up in the foetal position crying. Why did your ex contact you anyway? Was it only coz someone hurt her? I bet it was wasn't it? Link to post Share on other sites
YouNeverKnow86 Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 Yes I have seen that movie a couple of times! I thought it was pretty spot on when it cones to being the dumpee. I always remember how he's curled up in the foetal position crying. Why did your ex contact you anyway? Was it only coz someone hurt her? I bet it was wasn't it? She contacted me to see how I was doing in life and I guess to mend things between us, but yes the whole meetup/contact took place once she was single again. So of course she must have just gotten hurt........This is probably a common theme. Link to post Share on other sites
YouNeverKnow86 Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 Ahhh I know how you feel,, I sooo wanted my ex. back at 1st but now that my emotions have setteled down and am looking at it in a different way I also don't know how I'd react if my ex. came back because of the disrespect and betrayel,, funny what time and N.C. can do. Yeah man it is all so weird. I think about her all the time and I get my sad moments but I really don't know what would happen if I did have her in my arms again. I think our bodies really do put up a defense mechanism towards a person that inflicts so much pain. I can only relate to this because I have experienced it with a previous ex. Link to post Share on other sites
Sugarkane Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 And dont understand the guy I dated after my ex. Begged me back, promised everything would be different. Only to stand me up and call me the nutjob. Why the he'll would you even do that to someone? Do I have sone sort of sign on me saying Aholes only or something? why do they think its ok? I cut that imbecile right off. Link to post Share on other sites
Wesker Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 I'm 6 months out from my ex of over 7 years dumping me for another knob. We work at the same place, so I still see her now and again. Botch can't even look at me anymore. Maybe it's guilt. Prolly not though. Even when I called her out about the other idiot while she was shattering my heart, she couldn't even look me in the eye, and tell me the truth then. Amazing how you can invest 7 years with someone. 7+ years of love, effort, trust, and have it mean absolute sh*t in a snap. All because some cock knocker with a fancy car, and house couldn't leave well enough alone. In the beginning, I wanted nothing but my ex back. Now, it's almost the complete opposite. I highly doubt I'll ever hear from her again, or get that "2nd chance" opportunity that some do. Considering she's marrying the fool pretty soon. Yeah, only a mere months after being with me, she can up and do that just like that. I guess it just shows how needy she really is. Don't think she's ever been single for more than a month in her whole life. What makes this so hard I think now is all those why's, and how questions we have. I know I'll never get any of them answered, yet they still pop in sometimes. Link to post Share on other sites
lolita jade Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 (edited) I think you go from wanting them back desparately to hoping that that they will fail and be so hurt with their OW/OM. Just think. They are in honeymoon phase. They probably haven't had their first argument. Think of all your ex's bad traits and habits too. Will the new person put up with them? I laugh when I think what the OW doesn't know about him yet. teeeeeeee heeeeeeeeee And have been told by a friend who has done GIGS. You go back to your comfort zone when it goes tits up. So I am starting to think we as dumpees will have the last laugh when we wont want them after their honeymoon phase is over. hopefully, we will be in our honeymoon phase then with an OW/OM and we would have been sensible to wait until we were ready. Edited December 11, 2011 by lolita jade Link to post Share on other sites
DannyT27 Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 I really hope this is true lol, Lolita how long does gigs or rebound usually last ?my ex been with her new fella amost 2 months now... But I went out last night and was told ny a friend that she was actually seeing him even before she broke it off with me, I got angry and posted something on fb along the lines off 'i hate slappers' and when I woke up this morning hungova I feel really bad for doing it and deleted it. I want her to fall flat on her face and feel some of the pain I've felt. How long does the honeymoon period last usually ? I dnt thk I could ever take her back but want her to so I can tell her where to go lol.. Also she still talking and goin out with my mates gf's which annoys me because when I actually speak to them they knw much more than there letting on. I can't believe I'd put things like that on fb for everyone to see as it makes me look weak and like I'm not moving on which I am. Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
stunned8165 Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 I think you go from wanting them back desparately to hoping that that they will fail and be so hurt with their OW/OM. Just think. They are in honeymoon phase. They probably haven't had their first argument. Think of all your ex's bad traits and habits too. Will the new person put up with them? I laugh when I think what the OW doesn't know about him yet. teeeeeeee heeeeeeeeee And have been told by a friend who has done GIGS. You go back to your comfort zone when it goes tits up. So I am starting to think we as dumpees will have the last laugh when we wont want them after their honeymoon phase is over. hopefully, we will be in our honeymoon phase then with an OW/OM and we would have been sensible to wait until we were ready. Now that would be satisfying. Wait till her boss gets a loead of her anger issues and gets tired of dealing with her two young kids. He os 45 and already raised a 15 year old girl and owns a small pub. Do you really think he is in it with her for the long haul? http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t302201/ Link to post Share on other sites
lolita jade Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 Stunned, That sounds like my ex. he is 45 (no pub lol) our kids 20 and 23. She has 3 children. He doesnt like other peoples children. What is that all about?? He is very tight fisted with money and can be a dictator and other annoying things. Wait until she realises he he. Danny, I have been told really any time for GIGS from 6 months (when honeymoon period can end??? ) Link to post Share on other sites
lolita jade Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 ps stunned, no I dont think the two 45 year olds are in it for long haul. Mid life and honeymoon exciting phase I would like to think but you cant wait around thinking that. You have to believe it is perminant any move on. I think when we show we dont want them anymore it will shock them a bit. You want what you cant have. Link to post Share on other sites
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