Jump to content

Why does this hurt so much?


mikezombie777

Recommended Posts

mikezombie777

Hi guys,

 

Some of you might know my fiance broke up with me about 4 months and I've had trouble coping but I'm getting there (albeit not easily).

 

Now most recently, I went out with a girl a few days ago who I met through a friend, we're in a small country town and the first time we met she blew me off but was actually with someone at the time (which I didn't know until afterwards). She's a nice girl so we agreed to be friends.

 

When we went out to the drag races (she's that kinda girl lol) as friends but ended up kissing. We were both drinking and she got quite upset when she began thinking of her close friend who passed away awhile ago. I held her, she poured her heart out and cried. We went onto talking about how she always gets screwed over by guys and then we kinda just kissed. It was really nice and sweet. A perfect cliche.

 

Through out the night we talked about everything from life, death, her family and anything in between. We were so happy and made out, wrestled, drank etc. Just the two of us. After the races we just laid under the stars cuddling, kissing, talking....It was perfect. Eventually we were getting tired and I suggested we go to my place. I thought "wow this girl is awesome and I REALLY want to show her I'm not going to screw her around" so I DIDNT try to have sex with her. We cuddled and she fell asleep in my arms. We woke up, she said she was going home and left. The night was perfect.

 

Eventually she texts me and says she didn't realise how messed up she was until the night we were out and that she needs to sort things and that shes sorry if that hurts my feelings. I took that as code for 'drunk mistake' but I said we can be friends.

 

Even though it was only one night, it really hurts. I thought we seriously connected and there was something wonderful just around the corner.....I don't think I've ever had a more perfect night with a woman. How could the night mean nothing to her? I feel so worthless and rejected yet again....Maybe it was too soon for me but it feels like a whole new world of hurt just opened up again as I was healing. Worst of all she said she doesnt really remember all the stuff we talked about.

 

Maybe we were just each others rebound....

Edited by mikezombie777
Link to post
Share on other sites
Philosoraptor

You might have put too much of yourself into something before you were emotionally ready to do so. If you feel like you can be friends with her now, go for it... who knows what the future could hold when you both are ready. But also realize that she might date others and you might not be able to handle it if you go into the friendship with expectations. If not, then I'd suggest LC, don't ignore her but don't go out of your way either. While this hurts, it is still was just a one time thing and while you felt close you are not overly emotionally invested in her yet. Don't project your past relationship feelings onto someone new if you are doing so.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Like Raptor said, maybe it was too soon. You might even be combining the emotions from your break up and this experience.

 

Maybe she's in a similar situation and just came out of an emotionally messy break up, too. But look at the bright side, you found another chick to dig and I'm sure she digs you to an extent as well. See, those "other fish" people were right. :-D

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...