Struggling to accept mom's LDR

[bean1]

I don't think I've ever posted here before. Not in an LDR and have no problem with them but I am struggling to accept my mom's.

 

My mom had an 'internet affair' and left my dad (of 33 years). The marriage was bad and I have no issue with the split (poor circumstances yes).

 

She started dating this guy (2 years younger than me, 23 at the time) on the internet. She's 50. He is in North Africa, she is in Canada. He is real (she went to visit him last year).

 

Then, they got married when she visited. They have known each other in person for about 2.5 years and now married for about 8 months.

 

He has been denied immigration several times (the government believes he is scamming to enter the country). My mom is genuinely in love - I believe he is scamming her for citizenship. She has no money but has spent the little that she has visiting him and sending him gifts.

 

Let's be real - how does a traditional 23 year old muslim man in North Africa have any respect for a 50 year old adulterer woman? *She was living with my dad until 3 weeks prior to marrying the internet guy. Yes, married 3 weeks after divorce finalized and they lived together until that day. I am well familiar with his culture (I teach ESL) and have traveled in his country - I know all too well how he & his family perceive her.

 

She is angry with me for not accepting this. Any suggestions? I don't care if he comes here & leaves her. That is honestly my wish. My fear is that he will be abusive to her.

Edited December 9, 2011 by bean1

[FitChick]

There are a lot of these sham marriages. Be thankful she doesn't have money to lose.

 

Maybe google all those stories (dailymail.co.uk has had quite a few) and send her the links or print them out in black and white so she can read them for herself. You are right to suspect it might end in violence when the man doesn't get into the country. He or his family might do away with her. It happens. Good luck!