girlfriend doesn't trust me?

[hesh86]

This last week was messy. I said some nasty things to my GF after having a petty fight with her. I apologized the next day. I really do regret saying them - they were quite malicious. She forgave me (or so she said) and that was the end of it. Yesterday she wanted to have dinner. I said fine. After work we hung around and one thing led to another and we made out for a few minutes. I was turned on and told her we should go a little further if you know what I mean. She declined. She has refused before with words like "I don't feel like doing it" or "we don't have to do it". Yesterday, she was clearly more assertive. She reminded me about how I had recently said that I wanted to cut down on the physical stuff. OK, that is fine with me - I appreciate that she reminded me. But her tone was definitely different - she said a cold 'NO' several times (she's never done that before). Still fine.

 

Then she wanted to do what she wanted to do. I should mention that for two days I was asking her out and she had other things to do on thursday but nothing on wednesday. She refused to go out on both days. Now she wanted to go out on friday, to a place she wanted to go to and she did not want to do what I wanted to do. In my frustration I told her I did not want to go out with her. I did not want to have dinner if she did not want to get physical. End of that evening.

 

Today she looked visibly upset and when I asked her what was wrong she told me I made her feel like a slut!!!! WHAT?!!! I told her I was sorry if I made her feel that way but my point was that I was kinda insulted that she wanted to do something that she herself refused to do for the last 2 days when I asked her. (And also because she did not want to get physically intimate, which is fine...but read on)

 

So she said that now she had a 'fleeting' doubt about whether I am in the relationship only for the physical pleasure! HUH?!! That is one of THE WORST things anyone has ever said to me. We have been together for over ten months. We have talked to each other's parents and we have considered marriage. Why does she still not trust me? Later on she said that she loved me and I told her that I loved her, we hugged and it was all fine. But when I thought more deeply, I found that it wasn't a fleeting doubt that she had - it must have been a genuine concern! She is blaming it on all of the cumulative events of the week, but I don't buy that. I think she genuinely thinks I am in it for the sexual stuff!

 

Should I ask her if she really does distrust me? How do I tell her that I am not in it for the physical stuff. I am kind of hurt that she thinks that way after just one incident. We have recently gone from being intimate twice a month to once a week and all of a sudden it is too much for her? Advice please.