Life goes on...

[solong123]

To this day i have not gotten a text a call or an email to explain why he just stopped talking to me, and i have found out today he is now dating the girl who he just met 3 weeks ago, right after he started ignoring me. He is 21 she is 17...it has finally hit me today that i need to stop wasting another second getting upset over someone that would do this. He clearly didnt love me or even care about me if he couldnt atleast have the decency to end things with me first. Its a sucky situation and its a harsh reality but i am finally coming to terms with it. There is nothing wrong with me, this is a reflection only on him and his cowardly ways. This isnt really a question more of a vent. I wish every one luck as we all continue through our healing.

[davesterr]

It hurts to find out that you get ignored simply because the one you love has found someone else they like and don't have the decensy to actually tell you about it.

I can still remember the confusion and agony when my ex just stopped talking to me when we were doing great just a few days earlier before she did that.

Heck i remember i cried just because i couldn't understand what changed.

I know what it feels like and it's a real sad feeling to experiance.

 

Unfortunately it is the way it is and no matter what we do , we most likely can't change anything.

But the good thing is that you found out.

Atleast now you know what he is like.

And why he has been ignoring you.

 

Let it be all the more reasons for you to move on and let this help you get over him faster.

I'm real sorry though , i been there and it really hurts.

But in the end when you turn this negative into a positive , you will be thankful you found out.

Because it will help you find your selfworth and lets you move on faster.

Edited December 11, 2011 by davesterr

[solong123]

I really appeciate your response. Im sorry to hear you had to go through the same thing because it really does hurt. Finding out definitely made me realize how i reallly need to just get over it. I really believe everything happens for a reason...if you dont mindme asking how long ago did that happen to you?

[davesterr]

Well for me it was a bit different.

Me and my ex were broken up but i flew back to america to give it another try.

At some point around the end of february of this year we started talking again online and started to get really close again.

For a moment it felt like old times and she even suggested she wanted to meet me.

Then 3 days before we were going to meet in reallife , she started ignoring me all of a sudden.

I couldn't understand what went wrong.

What changed? Did i upset her? Did i do something wrong?

I couldn't get it.

 

She ignored me for 2 days straight and i got all my hopes up to seeing her in reallife just one more time and trying to get back together.

It doesn't happen everyday where i stay in a country for 6 months on my own just to give a ldr relationship a chance or a broken relationship to get back together so we would no longer be ldr.

Ironically despite me staying in america for 6 months , i only got to see her once for less than 6 hours.

 

Anyways 1 day before we were meeting i asked her best friend , why is she ignoring me?

Her best friend said: Oh she's probably talking to her boyfriend.

It was the most hurtful thing anyone has ever told me.

I broke in tears and it felt like my whole world was crashing in on me.

All this time i brought my spirits up that i would see her that i could somehow make her fall for me again or atleast meet her to see her 1 last time.

And now this happened.

I knew she didn't have a boyfriend but why would her best friend say this just to hurt me?

What did i ever do to her?

 

Long story short , somehow someway my ex and her best friend did decide to meet me after all.

Sure me crying for the last 2 days and staying up all night because of anxiety and not being able to sleep didn't make me look at my best on the day we did meet.

But i did get to see her and i did try to get back together with her.

I'll save you the story but the results weren't in my favor.

She didn't feel the same and just wanted to stay friends.

 

On the date i told her best friend that i still loved my ex and that i know she doesn't have a boyfriend , right?

And she said: No , she doesn't.

But in the end it turned out that the guy she was talking to when she was ignoring me , became the guy she actually started dating and is dating still.

So even though our situations aren't the same , i do know of the experiance you are talking of of getting ignored for no apparently reason and it really does hurt.

Just be glad you finally find out so you don't have to wonder why.

The wondering and dwelling is what really hurts most.

Because it ends up reflecting on yourself and making it feel like you were the one to blame.

I'm just glad i no longer self destruct and am slowly regaining my worth.

Hopefully you will too.

Edited December 11, 2011 by davesterr

[YouNeverKnow86]

Dave,

 

The ignoring doesn't always mean the dumper is talking to someone else right? They could just be moving on from the situation.

[davesterr]

No it doesn't.

However during those 2 days my ex did ignore me it was because she was talking to her current bf as her best friend told me.

And with the topic starter her boyfriend has been ignoring her while he found someone else.

 

I am simply telling her my story since i feel that it was somehow similar.

But i didn't say that whenever someone is ignoring you they are instantly talking to someone else.

It's just weird how sometimes everything can seem perfect and then suddenly change out of the blue.

No one knows what the cause might be but in mine and the topic starters case , our ex's were both talking or seeing someone else.

Edited December 11, 2011 by davesterr

[Sugarkane]

Solong your ex is a complete coward. U hope someone does exactly the sane to your ex.

[LostJustLost]

I loved reading this, your story mirrors my own solong123, I waited online every day for him to come back (his computer crashed) he started posting on FB. He did not say a word to me. That hurt in ways I can not put into words.

 

After reading dozens of stories, advice threads, coping threads and going NC I'm also making progress. Go Us! I've realized it wasn't something I did. It wasn't my choice to lose him but it happened. Accepting what is isn't my choice but its over so that has to happen too.

 

We'll still have ups and downs but here's to today being a good day. I hope every time the emotional spiral inside does a tail-spin, it's affect is less and less and less.

[smokey bear]

To this day i have not gotten a text a call or an email to explain why he just stopped talking to me, and i have found out today he is now dating the girl who he just met 3 weeks ago, right after he started ignoring me. He is 21 she is 17...it has finally hit me today that i need to stop wasting another second getting upset over someone that would do this. He clearly didnt love me or even care about me if he couldnt atleast have the decency to end things with me first. Its a sucky situation and its a harsh reality but i am finally coming to terms with it. There is nothing wrong with me, this is a reflection only on him and his cowardly ways. This isnt really a question more of a vent. I wish every one luck as we all continue through our healing.

 

 

Lovely post, life does goes on and even becomes enjoyable again. Its hard but it doesnt last forever