If you want your ex back you need to do this....

[YouNeverKnow86]

Get a new girlfriend or boyfriend! It is the cold hard truth but it works. Now the new girlfriend or boyfriend needs to be more attractive than the ex but that is when the power shifts. I don't know how many times an ex has come back once they found out you are in a new relationship. It has happened to many of my friends, my sister and to my most recent ex (2 months after dating me her ex contacts her after 2 years of no contact).

 

I know it is terrible but it really is the truth. This is when your ex realizes you are no longer pining over them, you have finally moved on and it really HITS them that they may lose you forever! Honestly this is your best plan of action and this is why you need to go out and date!

 

So yes you end up the bad person in this situation because you will probably be screwing somebody else over but this is why you need to tell the new person the truth from the beginning (that you still have feelings for your ex). This will probably leave the newbie running but if you don't want to be the bad person it is your only option.

 

Now I would not resort to this but if you truly want to get your ex's attention than this is what you need to do. It is a cruel world and you know what sometimes you have to resort to such things in order to get what you want. I personally wouldn't do this but I am just stating a plain hard fact.

 

Think about this..........How many ex's have left you for their ex? Well that is because their ex came back once everything I mentioned in this post took place. Remember people want what they cannot have, you fall into this category once you get a new girlfriend/boyfriend. You instantly become more attractive.

 

Thoughts?

[ZimboGon]

I've always considered this, as some of my close friends are gorgeous and we would do it merely to get her to come back.

 

People tell me it would work, but there is always one person who says it may push her even further away and give her the wrong idea. Just by merely hearing that, I don't. I don't want to risk pushing her away.

[Teuen101]

yeah you can do this, I've done it they want to come back but most the time at this point ive moved on or they have moved on.

 

If you did get them back would the same problem come back ? I heard my ex new boyfriend run down his ex I know he isnt over her, my ex is in trouble and don't see it.

 

I'm sure in a few months maybe will hear the fall out of this but maybe I wont. I really hope they work out lord know there is enough hurt and pain in this word it has to stop some time.

 

for me and only me I'm not going back to any ex and I don't want them back. I dont hate my ex or wish doom on her, she is a person who has a right to be happy I hope this makers her happy.

[gibson]

Rebounding and making your Ex jealous so they come back is your plan?

 

1. You aren't healing.

2. You aren't moving on.

3. You are using and taking advantage of someone else.

4. Assuming your Ex gets jealous, your Ex will only be coming back to prove to themselves that you are still wrapped around their finger and dump you again.

 

Your plan is crap and will not work out for you, the person you are using or getting back together with your Ex.

 

I will stick with healing, moving on and if it's meant to be, it will be plan. There are no downsides to this plan!

Edited December 27, 2011 by gibson

[YouNeverKnow86]

Rebounding and making your Ex jealous so they come back is your plan?

 

1. You aren't healing.

2. You aren't moving on.

3. You are using and taking advantage of someone else.

4. Assuming your Ex gets jealous, your Ex will only be coming back to prove to themselves that you are still wrapped around their finger and dump you again.

 

Your plan is crap and will not work out for you, the person you are using or getting back together with your Ex.

 

I will stick with healing, moving on and if it's meant to be, it will be plan. There are no downsides to this plan!

 

Gibson,

 

This is not my plan, it is just a suggestion or another means of action if one chooses to use it. It is effective and have seen it work many times. I also believe it gives the power back to the dumpee......It shows they have moved on. Like I said I wouldn't do it, I am just putting something else out there that has been known to work.

[gibson]

Gibson,

 

This is not my plan, it is just a suggestion or another means of action if one chooses to use it. It is effective and have seen it work many times. I also believe it gives the power back to the dumpee......It shows they have moved on. Like I said I wouldn't do it, I am just putting something else out there that has been known to work.

 

It does not work.

 

Neither the dumper or the dumpee have solved the problem(s) that lead to the break up in the first place. Your Ex would only be pursing you out of jealousy and you have the whole matter of the other person you are using to deal with that puts additional strain on you, your ex and this phony reconciliation attempt. This is never going to work out in the long run. In the end, you waste your time, your Exes time and the time of someone else. Everyone gets hurt and you end up right back where you started but worse.

 

How old are you?

[YouNeverKnow86]

It does not work.

 

Neither the dumper or the dumpee have solved the problem(s) that lead to the break up in the first place. Your Ex would only be pursing you out of jealousy and you have the whole matter of the other person you are using to deal with that puts additional strain on you, your ex and this phony reconciliation attempt. This is never going to work out in the long run. In the end, you waste your time, your Exes time and the time of someone else. Everyone gets hurt and you end up right back where you started but worse.

 

How old are you?

 

Gibson,

 

Once again I wouldn't do this, I am just putting this up for debate. I agree with your philosophy on the subject but I have seen it work for others. You can't debate that it doesn't work, but it has worked months later after the breakup such 6 months plus. I wouldn't do it because I agree with you it is wrong but I feel it is fair to put it up for debate on this website.

 

I am 25 by the way.

[chados]

this does work sometimes, but like gibson said the problem is still there, for me its about longdistance relationship, and that she's still in school. ive just deleted her from facebook.

 

i do believe that people often are in a phase in life when they dont know what they want. a chance of reconciliation is much bigger when both of you have moved on. for me its about lifeexperience, i need to get my life on the right track and she need to finish her studies. i think this is when we might get back together. im not going to wait for her. just saying that longdistance is very hard to maintain. its torturing her to only see my on weekends. ive noticed this but she didnt until it was to late.

[Kamila]

So is this method only working for dumpees ?

 

So what you're saying could be effective, you mean that my ex-bf whom I dumped 1.5 years ago is trying to make me jealous by flaunting his new girl all over FB ?

 

I must say that since we've been no contact he tried to contact me but I never replied, in his last message he told me he won't bother me anymore and he thought a lot about me.

 

Three months later he's dating quite passionately.

 

It makes sense now ! He's trying to make me jealous ! But he's still a jerk, even more now !

 

So to conclude, if you're trying to make your ex jealous, well in my case, it's not working, instead it just proves of how a pig he is.

Like gibson said, you could make matters worse, really. And my case is the example. And the underlying reasons that lead to the break-up aren't really solved. The jealousy just adds up to the mess.

I don't really wanna go to my ex-bf: ..........." You're with another woman now ! I'm so jealous ! Take me back ! Pleaaaseh !"

 

But I must confess, my blood was near boiling point when I saw them two together...

[YouNeverKnow86]

So is this method only working for dumpees ?

 

So what you're saying could be effective, you mean that my ex-bf whom I dumped 1.5 years ago is trying to make me jealous by flaunting his new girl all over FB ?

 

I must say that since we've been no contact he tried to contact me but I never replied, in his last message he told me he won't bother me anymore and he thought a lot about me.

 

Three months later he's dating quite passionately.

 

It makes sense now ! He's trying to make me jealous ! But he's still a jerk, even more now !

 

So to conclude, if you're trying to make your ex jealous, well in my case, it's not working, instead it just proves of how a pig he is.

Like gibson said, you could make matters worse, really. And my case is the example. And the underlying reasons that lead to the break-up aren't really solved. The jealousy just adds up to the mess.

I don't really wanna go to my ex-bf: ..........." You're with another woman now ! I'm so jealous ! Take me back ! Pleaaaseh !"

 

But I must confess, my blood was near boiling point when I saw them two together...

 

No Gibson is right that the underlying problems will still be there but if enough time has past that may not be the case. Of course it works for dumpers too but they were the dumpers. I am just going by dumpee experience with friends and such in that it seemed every time they started to move on/get a new gf or bf their ex dumper would then would try to reconnect. It's like they still want to have power over you and after ignoring you for so long why suddenly contact you. It is because they know you have moved on to someone else. Like you said, it make you blood start boiling............I think it is then they realize they are not over you. It is a sad truth but it really takes the thought of losing someone to someone else to initiate the process. Why do so many dumpees suddenly go crazy when they get dumped. Because it is then they realize they LOST their significant other and now they want what they cannot have. Before that the dumpee may have been lazy or got to comfortable in the relationship then bam it hits you. This is the same with the dumper, I think it hits them once they know they may actually lose you.

[chados]

So is this method only working for dumpees ?

 

So what you're saying could be effective, you mean that my ex-bf whom I dumped 1.5 years ago is trying to make me jealous by flaunting his new girl all over FB ?

 

I must say that since we've been no contact he tried to contact me but I never replied, in his last message he told me he won't bother me anymore and he thought a lot about me.

 

Three months later he's dating quite passionately.

 

It makes sense now ! He's trying to make me jealous ! But he's still a jerk, even more now !

 

So to conclude, if you're trying to make your ex jealous, well in my case, it's not working, instead it just proves of how a pig he is.

Like gibson said, you could make matters worse, really. And my case is the example. And the underlying reasons that lead to the break-up aren't really solved. The jealousy just adds up to the mess.

I don't really wanna go to my ex-bf: ..........." You're with another woman now ! I'm so jealous ! Take me back ! Pleaaaseh !"

 

But I must confess, my blood was near boiling point when I saw them two together...

 

 

 

its not about mushing it into your face. that wont work if youre a strong person. and of course the relationship itself must have been a good one. its about moving on, think about it, whats more attractive? a dumpee that never heals or a dumpee that does?

[YouNeverKnow86]

its not about mushing it into your face. that wont work if youre a strong person. and of course the relationship itself must have been a good one. its about moving on, think about it, whats more attractive? a dumpee that never heals or a dumpee that does?

 

 

Dead on! I don't care what anyone thinks, if your new bf or gf is attractive it would make the dumper go crazy.

[gibson]

You can't debate that it doesn't work

 

So at 25 years of age, you have seen someone get dumped, have an Ex come back strictly due to jealousy while you are already in another relationship will someone else, neither of you having dealt with the reasons for the break up and it ends in a marriage that lasts forever.

 

I'm 40 and I have seen plenty of people attempt what you said. Some got back together for a days, some for weeks, some for a few months and some for a few years. Heck, I have even seen some get married and later divorced... What I haven't seen is one that has lasted.

[Melrapuo]

No one ever stops to think about the feels of the person caught in between this, huh?

 

No one ever does...

[YouNeverKnow86]

So at 25 years of age, you have seen someone get dumped, have an Ex come back strictly due to jealousy while you are already in another relationship will someone else, neither of you having dealt with the reasons for the break up and it ends in a marriage that lasts forever.

 

I'm 40 and I have seen plenty of people attempt what you said. Some got back together for a days, some for weeks, some for a few months and some for a few years. Heck, I have even seen some get married and later divorced... What I haven't seen is one that has lasted.

 

You are probably correct but no matter what we already know most 2nd/3rd/4th chances don't end up in marriage anyways. I also think jealousy plays a little part but I do think some dumpers do realize what they lost when they actually lose it to someone else. The underlining issues would obviously still be an issue like you said. I just think it is a fascinating thing that the tides usually change once the dumpee has moved on to someone else.

[chados]

No Gibson is right that the underlying problems will still be there but if enough time has past that may not be the case. Of course it works for dumpers too but they were the dumpers. I am just going by dumpee experience with friends and such in that it seemed every time they started to move on/get a new gf or bf their ex dumper would then would try to reconnect. It's like they still want to have power over you and after ignoring you for so long why suddenly contact you. It is because they know you have moved on to someone else. Like you said, it make you blood start boiling............I think it is then they realize they are not over you. It is a sad truth but it really takes the thought of losing someone to someone else to initiate the process. Why do so many dumpees suddenly go crazy when they get dumped. Because it is then they realize they LOST their significant other and now they want what they cannot have. Before that the dumpee may have been lazy or got to comfortable in the relationship then bam it hits you. This is the same with the dumper, I think it hits them once they know they may actually lose you.

 

 

 

 

 

i agree, its the same thing when my friends girl cheated on him and told him she didnt want him anymore, but still texted him. well i told him to not answer her, he didnt and she got jealous and came back. stupid mistake by my friend to actually take her back. but what can you do. i cant change his feelings for her?

 

 

 

 

another friends girlfriend dumped him. he begged her, then one day he stopped. she found out that he's been on dates. she cried and begged him to come back.

 

 

personal experience. i went on some dates with a girl. she told me she loved me. i didnt feel the same. around 6 months later i saw her, she told me that she never stopped loving me. few months after that she started dating. then i had this feelings, what if i made the wrong decision? i was pretty young back then, around 18. but still, its crazy how my emotions was hunting me.

[YouNeverKnow86]

No one ever stops to think about the feels of the person caught in between this, huh?

 

No one ever does...

 

Unfortunately that is the truth and it happens too often...........Us generation of dumpees will have to be the ones to change that.

[gibson]

So what you're saying could be effective, you mean that my ex-bf whom I dumped 1.5 years ago is trying to make me jealous by flaunting his new girl all over FB ?

 

You are kidding right?

[wilsonx]

Arent you the same guy that dumped your ex, started dating a new girl, became friends with your ex, your next ex later dumped you and then you went and met your ex at a bar. Now this thread on making an ex jealous?

 

I called you out a long time ago on being immature, you just keep digging your grave deeper

[YouNeverKnow86]

Arent you the same guy that dumped your ex, started dating a new girl, became friends with your ex, your next ex later dumped you and then you went and met your ex at a bar. Now this thread on making an ex jealous?

 

I called you out a long time ago on being immature, you just keep digging your grave deeper

 

Oh here he is again, Wilson without stating the facts.

 

Again:

 

I dumped my ex 2 years ago, became friends again way before I met this current ex. Yes my current ex dumped me and 5 months later I met up with my previous ex for a drink.........They have nothing to do with one another!

 

This thread has nothing to do with making an ex jealous buddy it is stating a fact that once you move on to someone else then an ex usually comes back. Now if you want to do it to make someone jealous then that is your own reasons. I personally wouldn't but I think it would be a fun debate and it has so far.

 

Being immature? Dude I think you are more relationship/emotionally immature then most people on here. What you are 30? You are pining over a 22 year old ex? Get on with it pal.............Plus before you start attacking me once again state the facts about my 2 ex's and stick to the thread

[mike588]

First of all I'm not going to try this...I'm 4 1/2 months into being dumped..haven't heard a thing from her and I really don't care anymore and am leaving L.S. soon.

 

Since every relationship b/u is different I don't see how it would work if you were a rebound person... you ex. never developed a deep emotional bond/feeling/connection with you...he/she may have loved you but were not In Love with you.

 

That being said why would that make him/her jealous? I think that since there was nothing really there they would be happy/glad that you have found someone else and have moved on and may relieve some of their guilt (if any) for dumping you.

[ZimboGon]

I think that since there was nothing really there they would be happy/glad that you have found someone else and have moved on and may relieve some of their guilt (if any) for dumping you.

 

Yup. If it was truly meant to be, they will come back without your interference.

 

... and why are people so bleak here? 2nd chances do happen, and they can result in a long happy relationship that leads to marriage and children and a family. Not all relationships have to end, and if there is something meaningful in them, they usually don't.

 

So you don't need to use another person to make your girlfriend/boyfriend come back to you. I'll tell you, i've broken up with people before and they get in relationships too. I don't want them back, either i don't care or i feel sorry for them.

[gibson]

I KNOW several people (both dumper and dumpee) that have used the "approach" suggested in this thread to get an Ex back... they all ended, badly.

 

Do you know why that is?

 

Neither the dumper or the dumpee was authentic or true to themselves. The "new" relationship was based on jealousy, fear, lies, etc. In the end, they felt manipulated, taken advantage of and blame the other person.

 

The dumper and dumpee in this scenario both end up RESENTING the other person! You waste a heck of a lot of time and end up right back in the same place you started but worse.

 

If you are a dumpee, you want your Ex to be true to themselves and come back to you out of love. You also want the foundation of your "new" relationship to be based on love, truth, honesty, respect, understanding, compassion, etc.

Edited December 27, 2011 by gibson

[ZimboGon]

If you are a dumpee, you want your Ex to be true to themselves and come back to you out of love. You also want the foundation of your "new" relationship to be based on love, truth, honesty, respect, understanding, compassion, etc.

 

Well said gibson. If that was the foundation of your old relationship, and you both truly loved each other... Well then i feel there is a great chance if both parties can forgive each other you will get a second chance.

[chados]

I KNOW several people (both dumper and dumpee) that have used the "approach" suggested in this thread to get an Ex back... they all ended, badly.

 

Do you know why that is?

 

Neither the dumper or the dumpee was authentic or true to themselves. The "new" relationship was based on jealousy, fear, lies, etc. In the end, they felt manipulated, taken advantage of and blame the other person.

 

The dumper and dumpee in this scenario both end up RESENTING the other person! You waste a heck of a lot of time and end up right back in the same place you started but worse.

 

If you are a dumpee, you want your Ex to be true to themselves and come back to you out of love. You also want the foundation of your "new" relationship to be based on love, truth, honesty, respect, understanding, compassion, etc.

 

 

 

absolutely... but they often do come back, if the problem isnt solved theres no way it gonna last.. but it is better to move on and date others then sit around doing nothing. its far more attractive if youve had options.

 

the best way to maintain a relationship with your ex, especially if theyre young is to let them realize what lifes about. sometimes people has to grow up to know what they really want