carhill Posted January 8, 2012 Share Posted January 8, 2012 Yep, no scientific formula but I've worked out one commonality. Mine contacts me whenever she wants something or needs something, anywhere from 'stuff' to 'advice'. She did, however, in a startling recent development, contact me to offer my mother's old mixer back which she took when leaving. I was floored, not only that she'd offer it back, but that it was still working. I told her my vote was for her to 'keep it'. Link to post Share on other sites
Magda70 Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 Wait a minute with these statistics...what about lurkers? It is true that contacted-dumpees likely write on LS to speak about their experience but there might be many uncontacted-dumpees who do not write on LS just to say "Hey, (s)he never contacted me....": you write on events not on non-events I mean: statistics might be a bit too much in favour of the (s)he-shall-contact-you... Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 Before I got married, my data point would have been that 'no ex has contacted me, ever, for any reason, at any time'. See, no contact can be an answer as well. If people choose not to type on their keyboard, that's their choice. Link to post Share on other sites
TheJiltedGeneration Posted January 11, 2012 Share Posted January 11, 2012 *sigh* 6+ months since any form of contact, 7+ months since face to face, so yea she's moved on.. Link to post Share on other sites
Rorschach64 Posted January 12, 2012 Share Posted January 12, 2012 Don't sigh jilted. Think about it like this, your ex is doing you a solid by not contacting you because at least it puts you that much further along in healing and closer to finding someone else that is much more better for you. I am in the same boat as you so I can at least relate that it is slightly depressing but still it really is a blessing in a disguise. Link to post Share on other sites
TheJiltedGeneration Posted January 12, 2012 Share Posted January 12, 2012 Don't sigh jilted. Think about it like this, your ex is doing you a solid by not contacting you because at least it puts you that much further along in healing and closer to finding someone else that is much more better for you. I am in the same boat as you so I can at least relate that it is slightly depressing but still it really is a blessing in a disguise. well tbh even if I did'nt want her to contact me, the thought would never cross her mind ever, so that blessing in disguise is the insured fact that she will NEVER attempt contact ever.. ( trust me we had a period like this last year also..) hell the only constant think about her that I knew all to well was just how stubborn she could be, it's pretty much a key trait to her character... I guess that is a good thing, at least I don't even have to know her daily exploits to surmise what she's thinking about, as I know it isn't me. It would be clear sailing from this point, if the bad aftertaste of everything preceded, would'nt linger in every daily activity I do.. Link to post Share on other sites
Exit Posted January 12, 2012 Share Posted January 12, 2012 I know how you feel Jilted. I'm in the same boat, my ex is so stubborn and I should pretty much consider it a guarantee that she will never be the one to let her guard down and make contact, even if she really wanted to. But like you said, even though this should give us a clear path to move on without hesitation because we know we'll never be hearing anything from them, yet we are still affected by everything that happened. The bottom line is, whether you have the type of ex who still contacts or not, being dumped sucks. If your ex contacts you, you get to be in the category of people who complain "if she would just leave me alone I could move on, all these mixed signals keep me strung up, I don't know what to do", if your ex doesn't talk to you, then you're in the group of people saying "this sucks, I have no idea what she's thinking, why can't we at least exchange some brief contact, I need to know if there's hope, I need closure". People on both sides of the line complain. It sucks no matter what. Link to post Share on other sites
TheJiltedGeneration Posted January 12, 2012 Share Posted January 12, 2012 yea its a catch 22 suitation for sure, regardless of which end your on.. Link to post Share on other sites
HeavenOrHell Posted January 12, 2012 Share Posted January 12, 2012 It's more like 97% who won't hear from their ex's again, if we're talking hearing from them as in wanting them back. Here's to me and all the other dumpees who will probably find themselves in the 3% that will never hear from their dumpers again!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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