LostJustLost Posted December 31, 2011 Posted December 31, 2011 I did it. I've fought myself over leaving him comments anywhere since I first learned about going NC. I wished him a Merry Christmas. For me it was a way of saying I forgive you. I was surprised to see that he wished me the same. I didn't expect a response. I didn't want one honestly. Things got busy and I didn't get around to going there again until yesterday. I don't bother with it much (obviously) I felt no tears, no anger, no flutter in my heart, no pang in my chest. I'm really proud of myself, I've gotten so much stronger inside in a few weeks it's kinda startling. And I will now return to total NC and keep moving forward, healing my heart and my mind, I'm learning to breathe again, I'm getting back into life, and I'm not just going thru the motions any more, I'm actually living it. I think I've finally started to really let him go.
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