nature Posted January 15, 2012 Share Posted January 15, 2012 This email came to me out of the blue yesterday....we haven't talked in over 2 years. Don't even know which forum to post this in? Sorry you obviously dislike me and feel very negative and low towards me, very unfortunate! I'm sorry. Hope Oliver doing well! Bye (Oliver is my dog). Broke up over 3 years ago. Was a hurtful breakup. Explosive and sad. Broke my heart. He started running around partying with his friends like he was 19 years old again, while we were engaged to be married and had been together 3 years. I see him around fairly often, as our city isn't that big. and often times he's been with his new fluff ball girlfriend. That sounds mean of me, but she really is a ball of fluff. But I've done and said nothing and just kept to my own business. He has taken her to the places he knows I'll be that were my places to hang out long before he even moved to this city. It has hurt me so badly seeing them together sitting down a tables only a few over from me, etc. He takes her biking on the path he knows I walk my dog every day. It has been so sad for me. This email came to me out of the complete blue. Seems condescending to me with the use of the word "unfortunate", as he behaved like a complete jack ass which is why I've had no contact. What are you views on it? Am I being a b*tch by thinking he's being condescending? Why did he send this to me now? Link to post Share on other sites
Sugarkane Posted January 15, 2012 Share Posted January 15, 2012 He does sound condescending. He is really trying to get a reaction from you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nature Posted January 15, 2012 Author Share Posted January 15, 2012 Thanks SugarKane. So you think he's looking for a reaction? Well I haven't reacted. Thanks so much! Link to post Share on other sites
Exit Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 Wow that's a strange email to get after such a long period of time, it sounds more like the type of bitter reaction-seeking tactic that someone would employ in the first few weeks after a breakup, not 2 years later. That statement is designed to be very manipulative, he's telling you how you feel, and then the first reaction that comes to mind is to respond with something like "no I have no hard feelings, don't know why you think that" in order to defend yourself. There are no question marks in that email, he's not asking if you feel negatively towards him nor is he even making an open-ended statement like "I hope you don't feel bad towards me", it's just arrogantly dictating how you feel. Definitely not the type of thing worthy of a response. Shame, maybe if he made contact in any sort of a normal way just to say he still thinks about you, maybe you would have felt more inclined to engage in a brief friendly conversation. But since he didn't go about it that way, it's not worth anything. Link to post Share on other sites
smudge21 Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 Any response will feed his ego - no response will destroy it! Link to post Share on other sites
Author nature Posted January 16, 2012 Author Share Posted January 16, 2012 Thanks Smudge and Exit. My reaction to his words is the same as yours. It sounds condescending and a bit arrogant to me. In fact, it left me questioning why he even sent it in the first place and what purpose it served. It is not a sincere apology. And he's correct. I do feel rather negatively towards him. But I haven't acted on it. I've just gone about my business and not acknowledged him. Thanks so much for your input! Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 I think carrying a small can of bright pink paint around you for the occasion when he crosses your path again on purpose would be a great way of dealing with the problem. One splash and he would keep out of your way after that, no worries. Link to post Share on other sites
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