Is it best for Average people to Date Average people and give up their dreams?

[Negative Nancy]

If leaving was as simple as you make it sound, I would've done it a long time ago. Obviously you are not familiar with things like Citizenship/Visa laws (that in other countries, they actually enforce), having start up money so that you don't have no place to go when you get there, finding employment (another challenge of other countries, although to be honest finding a job in America today is almost just as hard), etc. I'm going to work a few years in the USA, then go as far away as possible.

 

tons of expats leave to other countries every year. or you could join the army, that way you could've killed two birds with one stone - army guys are highly sought after by the local army mattresses everywhere, after all - that's common knowledge. either way, it's not as hard as you are making it out to be. my boyfriend's living and working in my country, and though it was a lot of bureaucratic hassle, it was entirely doable. just gotta speak the language.

[KathyM]

I never said I had sex with women in all these countries. Just in a couple The reason for this is that I went with my grandpa for business reasons, I didn't stay in Paris or Buenos Aires, I was instead in the outer regions of Brittany and Santa Fe and didn't go out on tourist BS, I would go out to party in the town halls that usually house a pub or parties that go from 12 AM to 12 PM the next day on the weekends.

 

But it's not just about night life. It just seems like there are so many more women my age in other countries. When I go to the wal-mart in my area, all the people working there are 90 years old or have a strange appearance. When i go to a department store in other countries, all the women are my age and ...look normal.

 

The women in other countries are also cute but more on the plain side, not UNATTAINABLE like the modelesque women you see in Manhattan NYC. I guess in America those plain girls who are still kind of cute would be supermodels, since they aren't fat, but over there they're considered to be in my league.

 

The insane place is America, where I have to date a female with a massive beer gut who permanently smells like tuna, just for being a couple inches below average height

 

People in the USA are either completely neglectful of their appearance and very ugly, or neurotic vain freaks obsessed with physical perfection. There is a massive dearth of people who don't belong to either of these two categories, and unfortunately men are more often than not "rounded down" while women in the middle get to be "rounded up".

I didn't say you had sex with all these women, but that you had experience with them, since you claimed to know so well how all these various women are in their personality, character, etc. I have to wonder how much you can possibly know about them at such a young age. I'm not disputing the fact that women in other countries are more fit and slim. That's a well known fact. And it's unfortunate that so many Americans have allowed themselves to have all these weight issues. Product of our unhealthy diet, and sedentary lifestyle for most people, except for maybe those who can't seem to lose weight no matter what they do, and would have to starve themselves to be slender. I look at my kids' high school yearbook, who are now young adults, and I can't believe what I see. 1/3 obese. 1/3 chubby/overweight. That was a rare thing when I was in high school, so I do sympathize. But ignoring that fact of what women in America are, and expecting them to be something different, or not accepting anything other than that top 20% is not going to get you anywhere. It's denying reality.

[somedude81]

No offense verhrzn, but you're just a random internet chick.

 

The words of one such as yourself, can not override a lifetime of experiences.

 

Even if I knew a woman in person who told me that she doesn't care about height and actually prefers geeks, it doesn't mean sh*t to me if she won't actually date me.

 

It's all talk.

[verhrzn]

No offense verhrzn, but you're just a random internet chick.

 

The words of one such as yourself, can not override a lifetime of experiences.

 

Even if I knew a woman in person who told me that she doesn't care about height and actually prefers geeks, it doesn't mean sh*t to me if she won't actually date me.

 

It's all talk.

 

Except you haven't tried, as Dust is constantly pointing out. You're projecting all of these requirements we supposedly have onto the women around you without actually asking them, or making an extended effort to find out if they're true.

 

I may be a random Internet chick, but I'm still a chick with years of experience discussing this sort of things with chicks. You have... what, two women?... who have told you they prefer taller guys, but might also amend that to say they'd take a shorter guy with a great personality. Since you didn't ask that far, you just gave up at the first wall of resistance with a very small subset of women, how can you really argue your experiences can apply to even the majority of women?

[mortensorchid]

I had a rather depressing chat with a friend of mine recently about something in this ballpark. He is in his fifties, and has never been married and/or had children. I just assumed that he didn't want to do either one, but he revealed to me that he is hoping that he will (get married that is, children seem to be out of the question). This surprised me quite a bit to hear this, because, like I said, I just assumed otherwise about him. He said there is a such thing as lowering one's standards, because when you get to be a certain age you realize you don't want to die alone. I found that rather depressing to hear, but the more I thought about it the more I realized that is true.

 

There are people out there who lower their standards, because ... Well, I think at some point you just have to. I tried this once, deciding to go for someone who was completely against the grain of who I had been with in the past, a self described "average guy". Does it work? No, it doesn't. Because when you try to make a sandwich with the last two slices of bread, you will make a pretty lousy sandwich, which we were. Barely a year later, he married another woman. He was so eager/desperate to have someone in his life that he agreed to marry this woman (despite the fact that this was marriage #3 on her part), support her two children (even though he didn't want them himself), and pay for her oldest daughter's education. She ran off and married someone else after bleeding him dry. Sad.

 

So what's the answer? There is none. Except, I guess we have to just relax and trust that somehow, someday it will happen.

[somedude81]

Except you haven't tried, as Dust is constantly pointing out.

Who cares what Dust says? He doesn't live my life. Just because I'm not asking out five women a day doesn't mean I'm not trying.

 

You're projecting all of these requirements we supposedly have onto the women around you without actually asking them, or making an extended effort to find out if they're true.

 

I may be a random Internet chick, but I'm still a chick with years of experience discussing this sort of things with chicks. You have... what, two women?... who have told you they prefer taller guys, but might also amend that to say they'd take a shorter guy with a great personality. Since you didn't ask that far, you just gave up at the first wall of resistance with a very small subset of women, how can you really argue your experiences can apply to even the majority of women?

No, I'm not going to ask a woman I'm interested in if she prefers taller guys. Her rejection is all I need to hear. And then I'm not going to discout the women I have overheard IRL and on this forum who say they prefer a taller man. Hell, in the What is Average thread, a survey was done which asks women what they prefer. I'd have to be stupid to ignore all of that.

 

As for the wall of resistance thing, are you saying I should keep trying with a girl after she rejects me? As many are aware, I've already tried and it hasn't gotten me sh*t.

[Negative Nancy]

I want to warn the men of the world to stop globalization and feminism in its tracks because it could one day happen to them!

 

please. you sound like you want "the good old times" back. but you gotta take into consideration that in those "good old times" sex (which obviously is your primary source of frustration as well as your motivation) was not as freely available and women were pretty much bound to the kitchen, so unless you want a docile stepford wife, i doubt those "good old times" would have made a modern man entirely happy. or maybe it would have.

 

 

I know 3 languages fluently, English, German, and Spanish. I can hold my own or atleast understand the other languages in the family : french, portugease, italian, dutch.

 

that opens up a wide possibilities of countries for you then and also looks good on a resume. get back to us in a few years and let us know how the move has worked out.

 

 

btw, my bf is "only" 5"9. another proof that "average men" can score.

[Anela]

No offense verhrzn, but you're just a random internet chick.

 

The words of one such as yourself, can not override a lifetime of experiences.

 

Even if I knew a woman in person who told me that she doesn't care about height and actually prefers geeks, it doesn't mean sh*t to me if she won't actually date me.

 

It's all talk.

 

And yet, she constantly has random internet people expecting their words to override her own experiences - calling her a liar, and saying that she's fishing for compliments.

[Anela]

 

Doesn't make any of them particularly bad people. If the needle gets stuck and they end up repeating the same old crap all the time, more than anything, they become frightfully boring which is the death knell for any romantic encounter, regardless your looks, weight, height, wealth.

 

I've been putting off getting back to several people on OKC, for this reason: I freeze, and worry about getting past that initial stage, only to be rejected. It's easier for me to sit here and argue with guys who have zero interest in me, than it is to talk to the ones who already like me. No pressure with with the people here.

[Michael30]

And yet, she constantly has random internet people expecting their words to override her own experiences - calling her a liar, and saying that she's fishing for compliments.

 

From what I've read, I'd say she's been receiving plenty of compliments.

[verhrzn]

Typical exhange with Verzhn:

 

"I'm so fat and ugly"

 

[50 male posters rush in] "No you're so cute you're in great shape, hey want to talk to me?

 

"No, I'm too fat and too ugly

 

[50 male posters] "You look fine to me, kind of nice actually"

 

"No guys like me ever, despite being in more relationships in the last 5 years than Somedude, Ross, and ThaWholigan put together in their whole lives"

 

[Old virgin posters] "Well you should atleast be grateful for the experiences you have had. I've never even touched a woman and I'm older than you, it's obvious there are guys that like you at some point if you're not a virgin"

 

 

Rinse and repeat ....thousands of times. The girls fishing for compliments, gets them every time, and still complains.

 

Someone could say the same thing of you. Yet it's "none of our business" or "races shouldn't mix" or "THAT girl didn't count for X reason." Tons of female posters have also complimented you, and reassured you that height is no big deal, and you continue to complain.

 

And yeah, I've had relationships... with guys who were desperate and then prompted dumped me once they figured out it wasn't their height, nerdiness, looks, lack of money, or anything BUT their attitude holding them back.... AKA, the kind of guys Somedude and Ross will turn into one they actually DO have success with a woman. (ThaWholigan comes off as a real cool just confused guy who is taking his time with his dating life, much kudos to him.)

 

And as Somedude said, I'm just a random Internet chick. These "compliments" I receive ("eh I'd bang ya") are just random Internet compliments that don't translate into real life. In real life, I can guarantee that you, or Ross, or Somedude, wouldn't give me a second glance because you'd be too busy seething in the corner about the hot girl who just rejected you for your "height."

[somedude81]

These "compliments" I receive ("eh I'd bang ya") are just random Internet compliments that don't translate into real life. In real life, I can guarantee that you, or Ross, or Somedude, wouldn't give me a second glance because you'd be too busy seething in the corner about the hot girl who just rejected you for your "height."

And yet you keep fishing for them.

[Anela]

Someone could say the same thing of you. Yet it's "none of our business" or "races shouldn't mix" or "THAT girl didn't count for X reason." Tons of female posters have also complimented you, and reassured you that height is no big deal, and you continue to complain.

 

And yeah, I've had relationships... with guys who were desperate and then prompted dumped me once they figured out it wasn't their height, nerdiness, looks, lack of money, or anything BUT their attitude holding them back.... AKA, the kind of guys Somedude and Ross will turn into one they actually DO have success with a woman. (ThaWholigan comes off as a real cool just confused guy who is taking his time with his dating life, much kudos to him.)

 

And as Somedude said, I'm just a random Internet chick. These "compliments" I receive ("eh I'd bang ya") are just random Internet compliments that don't translate into real life. In real life, I can guarantee that you, or Ross, or Somedude, wouldn't give me a second glance because you'd be too busy seething in the corner about the hot girl who just rejected you for your "height."

 

This is her experience. I know that I've also had the experience of not being valued, even though these guys claimed to love me - they get attention from me, a woman they think is pretty, kind, intelligent, sassy/fun, etc.. and then they seem to expand their horizons, just like the men who are in relationships that seem to be really strong ones, who end up hitting on me.

[verhrzn]

And yet you keep fishing for them.

 

I am NOT fishing for them! I genuinely think (and have been told in real life) that I am unattractive. It's not my issue that none of you agree. It was my mistake to ever post my picture in the first place, but people demanded that I "prove" I'm ugly... and when I try to prove it, then I get called a liar!

 

Of course, if I called myself attractive and reported that people called me ugly, then you guys would accuse me of thinking too highly of myself, and that I'm one of those stuck-up feminists.

 

Or if I called myself attractive and said I can't get anyone to date me, I'd be accused of having too high of expectations.

 

So, frankly, it was my fault for playing a game I can't win.

[Anela]

And yet you keep fishing for them.

 

NO, she's relating her experiences with others, just like you.

[Dust]

Are you just determined to be angry and "right"? The more you post, the more it becomes obvious that you actually CAN get women, you just enjoy dissing or ignoring them for the sake of reinforcing your own bizarre superiority/inferiority complex.

 

He knows he can get women. Yes he's just angry. He's also building up women to be bigger then they are...

 

@ Bolded......Dust has pointed this out quite a few times. I think it's just that he's become jaded. He comes across as being very intense, and I find that people like that can find it difficult to be objective about things at times, so I can understand why he's angry and can imagine how he is thinking about it. You get used to the anger and the intense way of looking at things and thinking about it, he's comfortable. I have the same problem with 2 of my brothers. Both very intense people, and very set in their ways and the way they think.

 

ThaWholigan you're a very well thought out guy. No one listens though haha. Well I guess we'll just have to keep enjoying trying to help ahah.

 

How incredibly sad and ironic, that he could get the very thing he complains about not being able to get if he would just stop complaining about not getting it. Then again, he has such intense hatred for American women, I'd wonder if he'd really want us throwing ourselves at him anyway...

 

Well the same goes for you little missy. You can and actually do get the thing you complain about. Guess its easier to see it in other people lol.

 

Well frankly, I think people should only date their own kind. I respect and have always lived around Asian people , but it's not fair for whites to steal away the women of Asian men.

 

Dude you should be like me and consider every woman yours until proven otherwise haha. Asian women do not belong to asian people! Those boobies and butts are there for the taking! We should all take on Chinese wives to stop China from taking over the world.

 

 

 

 

 

I really hate it how everyone keeps inquiring about this, it's nobodys business. I like shannon and talk to her every day, but she's like 10 years older than me and not really interested in me like that, and that's fine. IMO some girls think if they say something nice to me it will change what I see as facts and my experiences, but just so everyone knows, internet compliments don't mean anything when push comes to shove.

 

By that definition, VERZHN, what are YOU whining about? You have all the males on this forum pumping up your ego ,and unlike women, these guys would actually follow through if they lived by you.

 

First off you talk to Shannon on a regular basis... Dude if she looks like she does in those pictures who cares if shes 10 years older. You owe it to her to use and abuse her before some other man does. Think of it this way you could come over and spank her ass, twist her nipples and give her a good fcking in the inbetween time before she finds husband material or better yet till you find gf material.

 

As for Verzhn she has unrealistic expectations. She complains about being dumped which sucks... but relationships don't always work out. If I started dating the girl for instance it would by no means be an engagement. I'd just be having a good time and sure it could go that way but by no means would I even be thinking about that when we started and yes the relationship could end. Somedude would be a sure thing though.. that is if by some miracle she is attracted which some times it seems she might be... god you got to love a broken girl!

 

I just don't get why you're still complaining Wolf. You've got a plan to move far away to where all the perfect, kind, smart, hot women live, and you've already written American women off as either fat or stuck-up.

 

You don't want us anyway. So why do you care if we reject you? We don't meet your standards-so why are you upset that you don't meet ours*?

 

*This is not actually my belief. I've stated over and over that I know tons of women and am one myself that doesn't care at all about height, that doesn't require money, that happily dates nerds, and is actually put off by overly handsome guys. But I'm not hot, so my opinion doesn't count, right guys?

 

Are you into Somedude? He's yours if you are. Seriously you'll be married before 2013.

 

No offense verhrzn, but you're just a random internet chick.

 

The words of one such as yourself, can not override a lifetime of experiences.

 

Even if I knew a woman in person who told me that she doesn't care about height and actually prefers geeks, it doesn't mean sh*t to me if she won't actually date me.

 

It's all talk.

 

You're blowing it... And you're constantly so rude and dismisive. I know you're posible to simple to realize but every time you say "No offense" and fallow it up with something like "but you have autism" or "but you're asian" with the logic that their advice doesn't count you're being very disrespectful. So you might want to think about that mr. "Don't write about me any more!"

 

Except you haven't tried, as Dust is constantly pointing out. You're projecting all of these requirements we supposedly have onto the women around you without actually asking them, or making an extended effort to find out if they're true.

 

His dream date would be a girl asking if she could use his bathroom then jumping on him and taking off his clothes. Then Blowing him till he gets hard... then going on top of him and really giving it to him. He wants to be a girl... Somedude is a lesbian.

 

I want to warn the men of the world to stop globalization and feminism in its tracks because it could one day happen to them!

 

You can shut it down. Women are babies you can make them cry by saying the smallest thing. We have heaven on earth here if you just claim it. I realize alot of people are suffering but you wolf don't need to be one of them. It's all in your head... All of it.

 

True story I was at a bar and decided to talk to this hot chick. She flat out calls me a "Loser!" real loud and says not to talk to her. She pissed me off and I called her a bitch! Nice and loud. The girl looks like she is going to cry and all of a sudden she's trying to win my aproval. Heck I could have turned it around at that point because now she seemed to want me to play nice but I was pissed. So I was still like "yeah you're a total bitch!"

 

Now the girl is going to the bartender and trying to get a big group of guys to beat my ass. They come over "Did you call her a bitch?" Me "Why yes I did because all I did was talk to the girl and she called me a loser." The guys just back off. So funny.

 

Now another story. I'm going into my apartment at night. The apartment has a security system that forces you to scan a badge to open the door into the building. She's up ahead of me scans her badge. Now I'm not going to be a lemming and scan my badge when the doors open. So I'm about to catch the door before it shuts completly but she quickly turns back anticipating me and slams the door shut and its to late doesn't open for me. So scan my badge get into the building and the girl is all smiling "sorry just being safe" Which I understand but... shouldn't she run to her apartment like the scared baby she is. I mean I could killed a guy and got the badge... or heck no some criminal trick I mean the place isn't fort nox. So it pisses me off that after slaming the door on me shes just standing around thinking its funny and feeling like a hero with her "just being safe"... I spout out "your just being an ass hole" she practicaly broke out in tears. haha. This is what you are afraid of wolf... women hahah They're more afraid of us then you will ever know.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Joining the military has been an option for me for a very long time, my only issue is that I don't want to kill iraqis and afghans who IMO are in the right in the wars for some speculator on wall street , I'd rather kill for my people and hang those very same scumbags. I tried to join the French Foreign Legion when I was 18, but after many back and forth emails they told me you have to go to France to sign up and I wasn't able to scape together the 1,000 dollar plane ticket for something that wasn't even a guarantee.

 

I know 3 languages fluently, English, German, and Spanish. I can hold my own or atleast understand the other languages in the family : french, portugease, italian, dutch.

 

Cool story. You seriously couldn't scrounge up $1,000 buck. Seriously you could have asked to borrow it from a woman you never intended on paying back as your final act of liberation!

 

Typical exhange with Verzhn:

 

"I'm so fat and ugly"

 

[50 male posters rush in] "No you're so cute you're in great shape, hey want to talk to me?

 

"No, I'm too fat and too ugly

 

[50 male posters] "You look fine to me, kind of nice actually"

 

"No guys like me ever, despite being in more relationships in the last 5 years than Somedude, Ross, and ThaWholigan put together in their whole lives"

 

[Old virgin posters] "Well you should atleast be grateful for the experiences you have had. I've never even touched a woman and I'm older than you, it's obvious there are guys that like you at some point if you're not a virgin"

 

 

Rinse and repeat ....thousands of times. The girls fishing for compliments, gets them every time, and still complains.

 

Haha thanks for that!

 

Hahah I love the girls fishing for compliments. Verhzn delivers she shows us pics. We need to get her in a bikini or something if she wants more compliments.

 

Someone could say the same thing of you. Yet it's "none of our business" or "races shouldn't mix" or "THAT girl didn't count for X reason." Tons of female posters have also complimented you, and reassured you that height is no big deal, and you continue to complain.

 

And yeah, I've had relationships... with guys who were desperate and then prompted dumped me once they figured out it wasn't their height, nerdiness, looks, lack of money, or anything BUT their attitude holding them back.... AKA, the kind of guys Somedude and Ross will turn into one they actually DO have success with a woman. (ThaWholigan comes off as a real cool just confused guy who is taking his time with his dating life, much kudos to him.)

 

And as Somedude said, I'm just a random Internet chick. These "compliments" I receive ("eh I'd bang ya") are just random Internet compliments that don't translate into real life. In real life, I can guarantee that you, or Ross, or Somedude, wouldn't give me a second glance because you'd be too busy seething in the corner about the hot girl who just rejected you for your "height."

 

Somedude is so rude yet he has the balls to complain to me about the thins I say.

 

Wolf can get women we know he's a hypocrate... but you my dear don't realize how easy you have it. You're our resident LS princess. So stop feeling so sorry for yourself!

[somedude81]

OK, I'm going to break it down.

 

What do you seriously hope to accomplish by saying something like this?

 

"I can guarantee that you, or Ross, or Somedude, wouldn't give me a second glance because you'd be too busy seething in the corner about the hot girl who just rejected you for your "height." "

 

To me, it sounds like you are trying to bait me and any other male reader into calling you attractive or saying that we'd date you. Then when one of us foolishly does so, you ignore it. Then you go ahead and call me out by name again.

 

Frankly it's getting old.

[Dust]

OK, I'm going to break it down.

 

What do you seriously hope to accomplish by saying something like this?

 

"I can guarantee that you, or Ross, or Somedude, wouldn't give me a second glance because you'd be too busy seething in the corner about the hot girl who just rejected you for your "height." "

 

To me, it sounds like you are trying to bait me and any other male reader into calling you attractive or saying that we'd date you. Then when one of us foolishly does so, you ignore it. Then you go ahead and call me out by name again.

 

Frankly it's getting old.

 

You know if we have to vote between keeping the original somedude or the female somedude my vote goes for verhzn. Stop getting anoyed by her and instead enjoy it. Her needyness is there for you to exploit. You've been posting on this site for years now and havn't had so much as 1 real date let alone a gf.... time for you to spot that she is one of those lonely girls you say don't exist! Yes she is making her own problems... BUT you are also creating your problems mr. Victim... There are verhzns in your area undoubtly.. but if you like her how about treating her sweetly instead of with such anger.

[Dust]

Hey Dust I agree women are more afraid of us than we are of them.

 

Even the guys on this site who are afraid of women could never match the fear most women have of men. They leave the house each day afraid a man might *gasp* look at them.

 

I have similar stories to you' date=' I've made girls cry before and didn't even know what I did lol. Back when I was a muscle man, I used to make girls cry but also really angry. I even have some stories from last year about a girl I knew, I called in some favors to help her with something and she didn't even say THANK YOU I got mad, said somethings and then she attacked me violently in uncontrollable rage with a metal pipe, I ended up outside drunk and shirtless and we were both in handcuffs (neighbors called the police) like white trash on Cops [/quote']

 

Getting attacked by a girl is no joke. It's like getting attacked by a child. You can't just outright punch them in the face and scatter their teeth around the ground with out being pure evil. So you just have to restrain them... but even that can't end up breaking them.

 

I had a gf who I got in a fight with. I started storming out to leave. She came at me like a maniac and ended up falling over as she tried to grab me. Luckily she was fine. But women are so fragile they can't break themselves attacking even if you do nothing.

 

Could you imagine if a girl was trying to leave my place and I came out full force trying to stop her. It would be 50/50 shot at ending up in jail for battery and god knows what else. But women are like children we know we're on another level physicaly... they can poison and shoot us though!

 

 

That being said' date=' I have no question that I can make girls cry or overpower them mentally/intellectually/physically. My problem is that, like children, the times I make myself vulnerable to their whim they don't treat me like I would treat them (respect and become endeared by their vulneribility), they instead choose to take advantage of it or step over me to satisfy their ego. [/quote']

 

Never make yourself vulnerable to a girl. Say you had a wife of many years. Then you lost your job. The lost thing you'd want to do is go to her looking for suport... They'd be so scared for themselves they'd dump all over you. Kick you when you're the lowest.

 

As long as you don't play the feelings game with them you'll be superior in every way. If you allow yourself to start getting mushy then you're in their realm and they'll walk circles around you.

[Anela]

Even the guys on this site who are afraid of women could never match the fear most women have of men. They leave the house each day afraid a man might *gasp* look at them.

 

 

 

Getting attacked by a girl is no joke. It's like getting attacked by a child. You can't just outright punch them in the face and scatter their teeth around the ground with out being pure evil. So you just have to restrain them... but even that can't end up breaking them.

 

I had a gf who I got in a fight with. I started storming out to leave. She came at me like a maniac and ended up falling over as she tried to grab me. Luckily she was fine. But women are so fragile they can't break themselves attacking even if you do nothing.

 

Could you imagine if a girl was trying to leave my place and I came out full force trying to stop her. It would be 50/50 shot at ending up in jail for battery and god knows what else. But women are like children we know we're on another level physicaly... they can poison and shoot us though!

 

 

 

 

Never make yourself vulnerable to a girl. Say you had a wife of many years. Then you lost your job. The lost thing you'd want to do is go to her looking for suport... They'd be so scared for themselves they'd dump all over you. Kick you when you're the lowest.

 

As long as you don't play the feelings game with them you'll be superior in every way. If you allow yourself to start getting mushy then you're in their realm and they'll walk circles around you.

 

No, no, no. To all of it.

 

This type of thinking makes me never want to talk at all - I don't trust anyone to not see that I have certain issues, but I'm also pretty damned strong, there are just certain parts of our personalities that you guys can exploit (your words), before our own instincts kick in, if they haven't already.

 

Some vulnerability is a part of any healthy relationship, and both people should be able to receive actual support from their partners. Things like depression can exacerbate other stresses, and put stress on the relationship as the other person picks up slack. I'm rambling here, but you get the idea.

 

Looking and leering are different things. I never liked leering, and the come-ons. I trust when I trust; even if I felt immediate attraction, I wouldn't jump all over someone.

[verhrzn]

Haha thanks for that!

 

Hahah I love the girls fishing for compliments. Verhzn delivers she shows us pics. We need to get her in a bikini or something if she wants more compliments.

 

Pictures of me in a bikini actually do exist somewhere out there. Who wants to play LS Expert Stalker?

 

Wolf can get women we know he's a hypocrate... but you my dear don't realize how easy you have it. You're our resident LS princess. So stop feeling so sorry for yourself!

 

SWEET, where's ma pony?!

 

OK, I'm going to break it down.

 

What do you seriously hope to accomplish by saying something like this?

 

"I can guarantee that you, or Ross, or Somedude, wouldn't give me a second glance because you'd be too busy seething in the corner about the hot girl who just rejected you for your "height." "

 

To me, it sounds like you are trying to bait me and any other male reader into calling you attractive or saying that we'd date you. Then when one of us foolishly does so, you ignore it. Then you go ahead and call me out by name again.

 

Frankly it's getting old.

 

Not even close. What I'm trying to get you to do is stop navel-gazing. Stop thinking "me, me me." Stop staring at yourself in the mirror and analyzing why you're getting rejected. Stop fixating on the hottest girl in the bar, or the one girl in the bar who your eyes immediately locked onto but won't give you the time of day.

 

Open your eyes. Look around. See the possibilities. See what girls are noticing YOU. You're so busy beating yourself up with your standards and your rejection that you're ignoring all the potential... the shy, cute-but-awkward girl sitting in the corner, wishing you'd notice her.

 

It's been my point all along... that girls who are not classically attractive have it rough because no one will acknowledge their existence. It's a huge untaped resource, if you can set aside your own insecurities, and your own need for validation.

 

Once you actually see a woman for who she is.... not as an object, or a trophy, or some force of nature, or something to fear or worship.... you'll see so much beauty and potential you'll wonder if you were previously blind.

 

THAT'S what I'm trying to do. It has very little to do with me personally. I am merely a representative of the Forgotten Girls.

[RecordProducer]

My ex has a great recipe for average-looking guys who want to date good-looking girls.

 

He:

Average-looking (age 54)

Extremely smart

Fantastic sense of humor

Very wealthy

Well-educated

From a good family

 

She:

Good-looking (age 38)

Brainless

Low class

Twice convicted for shoplifting in the past two years

Used to be a manicurist, then finished some local, crappy nursing school

Conspicuously, a gold digger

 

Hey, he got his sexy blonde, didn't he?

 

I, on the other hand wasn't good enough for him.

 

Me:

Good-looking (age 36)

Extremely smart

Fantastic sense of humor

Will be wealthy when I become a lawyer

Well-educated

From a good family

 

He dumped me after a couple years of marriage and I still don't really know why. I think it was God's hand to rid me of him.

 

(I didn't include character flaws and other issues because we all have them.)

[SteveC80]

I couldn'nt imagine being with somebody i dont fidn physically appealing and couldn't even pitcure naked,wheter people want to admit it or not lust and animal attraction is a part of a relationship

 

I fele sorry for the average and unattratcive who cant get a partner who they fidn appealing on any level physically

 

Id rather be alone then with somebody i have no attraction to

 

Liking somebody as a person but no physical attraction is caleld a FRIEND not a LOVER

[Dust]

What's the password to your photobucket

 

Send me the link too!

[betterdeal]

I've been putting off getting back to several people on OKC, for this reason: I freeze, and worry about getting past that initial stage, only to be rejected. It's easier for me to sit here and argue with guys who have zero interest in me, than it is to talk to the ones who already like me. No pressure with with the people here.

 

Maybe just reminding yourself that the vast majority of men on OKC are in exactly the same boat as you will help. They're a bit nervous, a bit excited, a bit hopeful, a bit worried about being rejected and so on. As you can see from here, men have pretty much the same insecurities (and aspirations) as women. Sure, we may respond with anger or huffing and puffing more, but that's all fluff. It's all a learning experience for all involved.

 

And rejection aint so bad, really, is it? I've come to the point of view that rejection is almost always because they or I wasn't ready, or we are just ploughing such a different furrow from each other that we weren't going to have anything more than we had. Even if it was just a brief exchange online, did it enrich my life? It can, if you take the right attitude to it - and to yourself.