A fork in the road. Need to pick a prong ... soon.

[akazid]

Not sure what to do with myself ...

 

So I sort of have a fork in the road and need to make a decision on what I want to do. There are 3 choices ("prongs") basically:

 

A little background: I'm 27 and will be 28 in July. I have a very stable job that will allow me to work from anywhere inside the USA with the same salary (Within 3 years I can be making 120k or so, from home. Also, my job is VERY stressfull.). Currently I'm in DC making 88k / year, basically debt free, only paying 575 / mo for rent, and I'm very mobile (Currently only have a cot in my 'room' as I plan on moving to NJ to work remotely from there ... my stuff was moved in a 20 foot UHaul around early November.)

 

The prongs are:

 

1) Study for 2 years for the LSAT / Get promotions at work and go to law school after being promoted. (~2-3 years)

 

2) Get promotions at work (~2-3 years) start looking around and hopefully setup a family in the NJ area. Also, here I can polish up my programming skills and have an interesting hobby. I studied programming in college and it's something I'd love to do but isn't something my job requires.

 

3) #2 but in a cheaper area. More than likely move to that area within a year or so. Some place like Ohio/Wisconsin/Illinois where stuff is a lot cheaper.

 

Currently I'm leaning with #1. Why? To me it appears that if I'd start dating I'd possibly be wasting my time with these people. My experience is that:

 

1) 21-24 year old women are mainly interested in sleeping around with older men (35+)

2) 25-28 year old women are the 21-24 year old ones but older and appear messed up emotionally.

3) OR it's a 25-28 year old woman that's extremely conservative/shy.

4) Someone I'm not interested in.

 

(Note: Above are from my experiences. They may appear like generalization but honestly, they are my experiences.).

 

Maybe my experience has been bad but so far here's what's happened:

 

1) Dated someone in college. She passed away on July 18th 2007. Why do I remember this? It was her birthday on the 19th and I left her a BDay voicemail (My BDay was on the 16th, recevied an awesome BDAy VMail from her on the 16th). Only to find out about 1 week later that she was in a jetski accident on the 18th, 1 day before her 23rd birthday ... still ... it's 2012. Why do I even remember this so well?

2) Tried dating someone from college/work between 23-24. Didn't work out. It didn't work out because it was in the workplace and very bad communication

3) 24-26 basically dedicated to paying off parent's debt. Decided that dating is a waste of time ... random dates here and there. Interesting people but never pursued any of them as I want to avoid long distance ... have gone to multiple HH's and got some dates there but nothing serious and mostly just friends.

4) 26- present met someone who I was interested in (23 yr old). Great person. Unfortuantely they're going from rebound to rebound with a serious case of GIGS, at least imho.

 

Right now I feel that if I develop myself more till around 31/2 before I start thinking about developing a family, etc? Say deveop mself by persuing a law degree, I'll better my career, etc. The only problem I see with this is 100k+ debt (I have 0 right now) and possibly changing jobs later (Even though I have a VERY good/stable job right now).

 

My second option I'm leaning with is #3. Main problem with this one, though, is I'd be farther from family - again.

 

The last option is #2 which is basically what will happen sort of 'by default' but, as the other options, would require effort on my part.

[tman666]

Whatever you choose to do, don't "do it for the chicks". Take that completely out of the equation...

[akazid]

Whatever you choose to do, don't "do it for the chicks". Take that completely out of the equation...

 

 

That's sort of the dilemma. #2 and #3 sort of imply that I'd be doing it 'for the chicks' because I'm going to start setting my roots - even though 'the chicks' are not present.

 

#1 does not imply that at all but by the time I'm done I think it may be hard/impossible to find someone reasonable, I'll have more debt, I'll possibly be single/set roots by a delay of 4-5 years - depending on the school and where I'd go.

 

Noentheless, there's no woman right now so I can make any of the decisions #1, #2, #3 WITHOUT hurting anyone. I'm sort of able to do anything but it'll have direct consequences and possibly delay stuff like family, etc, or limit my income potential, or prevent me from continuing to go to the gym.

 

Sort of trying to get an idea on what people think should be done as maybe I don't see something someone else would see/note.

[TaraMaiden]

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

 

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim

Because it was grassy and wanted wear,

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

 

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I marked the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way

I doubted if I should ever come back.

 

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

[tman666]

That's sort of the dilemma. #2 and #3 sort of imply that I'd be doing it 'for the chicks' because I'm going to start setting my roots - even though 'the chicks' are not present.

 

#1 does not imply that at all but by the time I'm done I think it may be hard/impossible to find someone reasonable, I'll have more debt, I'll possibly be single/set roots by a delay of 4-5 years - depending on the school and where I'd go.

 

Noentheless, there's no woman right now so I can make any of the decisions #1, #2, #3 WITHOUT hurting anyone. I'm sort of able to do anything but it'll have direct consequences and possibly delay stuff like family, etc, or limit my income potential, or prevent me from continuing to go to the gym.

 

Sort of trying to get an idea on what people think should be done as maybe I don't see something someone else would see/note.

 

Haha well, I can tell you that if the option impacted my ability to go to the gym regularly, it would be a no-go.

[USMCHokie]

Sounds like you've just had bad experiences, or just very limited experiences...especially in DC...it's certainly a strange place...and never make any life decision based on women or dating prospects...

 

Secondly, I would never recommend or even suggest law school to anyone...unless you already have a firm hold in the legal community, either through networking or a related skill that gives you an in, or are an all star. A legal education will get you nothing but debt. And 3 years of lost income.

[akazid]

Sounds like you've just had bad experiences, or just very limited experiences...especially in DC...it's certainly a strange place...and never make any life decision based on women or dating prospects...

 

Yup. Trying to do it that way but not sure how it came out. I'd agree that those are limited experiences. The 'forks' were not 'what should happen' but a rough idea of what 'may happen' depending on the decision made.

 

Secondly, I would never recommend or even suggest law school to anyone...unless you already have a firm hold in the legal community, either through networking or a related skill that gives you an in, or are an all star. A legal education will get you nothing but debt. And 3 years of lost income.

 

I have 5 years experience in my profession (Started when I turned 23). The private sector pays a lot more without a law degree and even way more with a law degree ... for literally doing the same job. Therefore, the degree would be a continuation within my current field and not an attempt at 'starting something new'.

 

Also, I fully understand your position with regards to a legal degrees. It's also one of the reasons why I'm careful about the decision. Even though I have 5 years experience in the field there is no guarantee that such jobs would be available. It would, though, even help with being promoted within my current job.

 

Lastly, the place I work at could pay for it if I attended part-time and worked full time but also require me to stay with the job 3 years past obtaining the degree. That would be hell/crazy, though, but sort of easier than normal due to flexibility/work from home.

[USMCHokie]

I have 5 years experience in my profession (Started when I turned 23). The private sector pays a lot more without a law degree and even way more with a law degree ... for literally doing the same job.

 

In general, false. It's not as much as you might think. If you had full loans, the difference would barely cover said loans, if even that. Law school is one of the worst investments you can make right now...

[yessy21]

sounds like you have too many paths and no direction.

This is what i would do. id write all my options in a piece of paper and include 2 random ones.and 2 more stating to choose between 1,3 or 2,1 put them in a hat. shake it and when your about to pick that random paper out... you'll know what your hoping for.

[akazid]

In general, false. It's not as much as you might think. If you had full loans, the difference would barely cover said loans, if even that. Law school is one of the worst investments you can make right now...

 

I just did the math on paper and, in general, you're right. If I have to pay for the degree it'd be a burden and a loss for 5-10 years on top of everything. A new job wouldn't be a guarantee of which a lack would put me in a more burdensome position.