CLS63AMG Posted January 23, 2012 Share Posted January 23, 2012 I called her this afternoon and left a message, and a text. No reply. I also sent her mom a message on FB thanking her for her kindness during my relationship with her daughter and if she could please talk to her for me. Its been 2 days since the break and feeling terrible. Wondering of there is hope I guess. It was a great relationship, loving, fun and then out of the blue she breaks it off. Did I screw up by making contact? Link to post Share on other sites
AwptiK Posted January 23, 2012 Share Posted January 23, 2012 Did I screw up by making contact? Yes. Now, stop. - It's only been two days, the pair of you NEED space. Any contact initiated by you, the dumpee, is going to push her away. If she has any doubts about breaking up with you, talking to her right now is not helping you. If she is set on ending things, you're still not helping yourself. You need to be 100% NC right now. Let her see what her life is like without you in it at all. Don't try to be friends right now, don't try to be anything. Focus on yourself and on healing. Link to post Share on other sites
Exit Posted January 23, 2012 Share Posted January 23, 2012 Well you can't undo what you did so there's no point questioning it. I would let this be the one time you reach out, and now maintain NC. I've done the whole "reach out to the parents" before, and when you're hurting it seems like a good idea, but in reality it's the quickest way to violate the person who decided to leave you, they don't need you going behind their back trying to get their parents to plead your case for you. They'll start feeling like they aren't even safe around their own family. So definitely don't do that anymore. It's over and done with, if your reaching out results in any response, fine, if not, there'd clearly be no point in doing it again. Link to post Share on other sites
Philosoraptor Posted January 23, 2012 Share Posted January 23, 2012 Well it's early on and most do this; so don't sweat it too much. Just take charge and keep your focus on yourself right now. Work on what you need to work on to get to that place of indifference and happiness. That path usually contains: Forgiving your ex (internally) for their mistakes, forgiving yourself for your mistakes, making a promise to yourself to not make any of the same mistakes (including allowing yourself to stay in a bad situation or take any abuse if that was the case). When you've found true forgiveness you will find that inner peace. Link to post Share on other sites
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