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I Guess I Am Done


TnMan1961

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My wife called me 17 months ago at work while I was on a night shift, and told me she had moved out. That was after 18 years of marriage. I love her with all my heart. I always have. I have waited and waited, and tried to make contact with her in every way I know. She says she loves me, but has not contacted me. I have left her alone now, to allow her to make up her mind. I am lost, and am ready to give up. I guess I have to face the fact that the only woman I have ever loved has left me, and has no love for me at all. Each and every day, each and every hour and every second I have...is about her. And I cannot stop. I am out of ideas. I have no where to turn. I give up on her, and myself. I have no where to turn anymore. I have loved her, been faithful to her, and tried to buy her everything she ever wanted or desired. I am so tired. All I want to do now is for her to tell me something, is that too much to ask? I am worn out. All I want is for this to be over. I am ready. I want to end it all, and I am tired. I want her to tell me what she wants to do, so I can end all my suffering once and for all. I am tired of n sleep, no rest, and no one to love me. I have been the best husband I could be...faithful, honest, etc....but I guess that doesn't matter. Oh well...I am ready just to go to sleep once and for all, and forget about her and about love. True love cannot exist. I thought it did...it did for me. but I guess it doesn't go both ways. I pray all of you have a wonderful life, and I truly wish you all the best. May God bless you in ways that I will never be blessed I assume. Goodbye to all, and Godspeed to all of you and I hope you all have great relationships. I thought I had one, but I was wrong. Goodnight, God bless, and I pray all of you will endure what I cannot.

:(

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Hey, you are dealing with a really rough situation. More times than I'd like to admit in my life, I've been torn apart by relationships coming to an end when they only lasted a year or two. Multiply that times 18 and I'm not sure I could handle it either. You've made it 17 months so far already though, and I know that doesn't mean you're feeling any better, but after a long relationship, that's understandable. But it sounds like what is holding you back is wishing to hear something from her. Like many of us, you tell yourself "even if she says no, I'd even be happy to hear that". But you could already have your answer if you really wanted it. It's clear her silence can't be interpreted as "yes I love you and I'm coming back", so it would seem her answer was, and still is, no. I know it's the last thing in the world you want to accept, but if you can accept it, at least you'll be freed from this need to hear something from her.

 

I certainly hope your goodbyes and references to "going to sleep for good" don't mean you're thinking of giving up on life completely. Somewhere inside you lies the strength to keep going, even if it's just one day at a time. I wouldn't dare say that I know what you're going through, because as I said above I can hardly handle losing a relationship of a year or two, and have never dealt with the end of a truly long term arrangement. There's got to be something else worth living for aside from being with this woman. You said it yourself, you were the best husband you could have been, and the problem lies with her, not with you. Now it's a time in your life to be the best you can be at something else.

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My wife called me 17 months ago at work while I was on a night shift, and told me she had moved out. That was after 18 years of marriage. I love her with all my heart. I always have. I have waited and waited, and tried to make contact with her in every way I know. She says she loves me, but has not contacted me. I have left her alone now, to allow her to make up her mind. I am lost, and am ready to give up. I guess I have to face the fact that the only woman I have ever loved has left me, and has no love for me at all. Each and every day, each and every hour and every second I have...is about her. And I cannot stop. I am out of ideas. I have no where to turn. I give up on her, and myself. I have no where to turn anymore. I have loved her, been faithful to her, and tried to buy her everything she ever wanted or desired. I am so tired. All I want to do now is for her to tell me something, is that too much to ask? I am worn out. All I want is for this to be over. I am ready. I want to end it all, and I am tired. I want her to tell me what she wants to do, so I can end all my suffering once and for all. I am tired of n sleep, no rest, and no one to love me. I have been the best husband I could be...faithful, honest, etc....but I guess that doesn't matter. Oh well...I am ready just to go to sleep once and for all, and forget about her and about love. True love cannot exist. I thought it did...it did for me. but I guess it doesn't go both ways. I pray all of you have a wonderful life, and I truly wish you all the best. May God bless you in ways that I will never be blessed I assume. Goodbye to all, and Godspeed to all of you and I hope you all have great relationships. I thought I had one, but I was wrong. Goodnight, God bless, and I pray all of you will endure what I cannot.

:(

 

 

Please , do not give up ! please do not do anything stupid . Call a helpline right now , you can PM me too if you want .

Edited by Buttercup84
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Please do not think about ending it all.

 

You are in the worst place right now, but when at the bottom, you can't go any further down, the only way is up. She's not worth ending your life, NO WAY! You sound like a good decent person who is writing down how they feel, we're here to help and support you, we really are.

 

Please let us know you're ok and as Buttercup said, you can PM me anytime.

 

I've been where you are right now, believe me.

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worldgonewrong

Tnman1961-

 

bro, don't do anything rash.

 

I was with my wife for a total of 20 years. She flushed it down the drain without any attempt to communicate.

 

I know you're hurting, and God knows I've felt despondent too,

but YOU CAN AND WILL LIVE THROUGH THIS.

 

Sending you love and prayers.

 

PM me if need be.

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worldgonewrong

~bump~

 

TnMan: please update us, buddy. We are concerned.

 

(Is there a way for the admins to match up his IP to an address/phone? It might be necessary for intervention so he does not harm himself.)

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