Hafer Posted February 14, 2012 Share Posted February 14, 2012 My gf of 6 months broke up with me out of the blue, using the “I need some space and I dont want a relationship right now” method. She said to me that she needed some time in december 19, and told me “I have never felt so loved by someone, and you really know how to treat a woman, BUT........” ( I also want to say that she had an awful BU with the guy before me, this guy cheated on her and she knew it, but stayed with him until the guy got the other girl pregnant. She was still kinda hurt when we met, so I was probably a rebound.) I told her that I wanted to defriend her on facebook and Msn, because I didnt want to see what would she be up to during that “time”, so I did. She kept calling me until one day I told her that I knew where this was going and wanted her to just break up with me once and for all; she was kinda shocked. A couple of minutes later I got a message on my phone “ I was just about to be your gf again, but you ruined it”. I didnt answer On January 10, 2012, she came to visit ( she lives in city “A”, I live in city “B”, but both of us study in city “C”, we met there) she slept here, we had sex, and the next day she left, we kissed goodbye. About 10:00 pm on that same day, she calls me, crying, saying “I really wanted to stay with you there, I miss you so much”, I told her to calm down and that maybe we could go get and ice cream someday, then she said “dont worry, I just had a breakdown” and we said good bye From that last call, 1 month has passed and she never called me again. One day, just for sheer curiosity, unblocked her on facebook and guess what I saw on her profile picture: she is hugged with another guy, smiling, and guess what, the guy has the same profile picture in his facebook. I felt really angry at first, did some research, and apparently she is dating this guy, and met him like 3 weeks ago. I was really angry because she never told me what went wrong in our RL, she just kinda slipped away, and then she starts dating again. Well, in about 1 month we are going back to city “C” to study again, and we live really close to eachother, so this is the way Im taking it: - I dont have any expectations from her, I dont have revengful thoughts against her, Im 26, she`s 21.......deep inside me, I forgive her. Im taking it as if she erased me from her life, ignoring fantasies like “she will realize it was a mistake/ she will come back/ she will apologize”, NO, Im dedicated to myself, working out, 25 mins cardio everyday, lifting weights, writting music, studying and getting ready for the year to come. NC with her at all, mutual friends all blocked, threw away everything reminding me of her. Im slowly starting to look thiner and getting in shape, and I intend to keep going forward with this. Im not gonna try to fool you guys, I have my days, that picture of them together just travels around in my mind, but I know it is normal, Im a human being and I know I must let myself grief. I keep away from overanalyzing things and from unblocking her on facebook to see if she has a new profile pic with the guy, cause, I already know everything I needed to know to be able to move on and accept that it is over now. I still have a juice maker machine that belongs to her, and I was thinking about asking a friend of her`s to deliver it, but I decided that this will probably make me look weak, so I decided that I will deliver it myself, once we go back to city “C”. Well guys, Im still struggling with the temptation of unblocking to see if she changes her picture on february 14, but, I now that wont help at all and would only hurt me. I go from completely OK to emotional wreck from time to time throughout the day, but I know it will get better. I dedicate this song to all you dumpees out there: Cain's Offering - Into the Blue Link to post Share on other sites
foolishlover Posted February 14, 2012 Share Posted February 14, 2012 Hey buddy, i feel for you. I am going through something similar, but i think yours is much more difficult to deal with than mine. Firstly, she is being incredibly harsh to you. She is using you and going back to you when it is convenient for her. She probably knows that you will always be there for her, so she treats you so poorly. Honestly dont bother about the juice maker. Its just an excuse to break NC. NC is hard and everytime i break it, it makes me feel worse. So try and stick to NC for your own healing purposes. Out of sight, out of mind. I think i read somewhere that 2 weeks and the mind can adjust to changes. So give it two weeks and hopefully it should slowly get better from there. Link to post Share on other sites
Onemore Posted February 14, 2012 Share Posted February 14, 2012 I've been through something similar recently around the same time you did where she told me she didn't want a relationship and the idea of having a boyfriend is "repulsive". Well 2 weeks ago I found out that not more than 2 weeks after she broke things off with me she started chasing around another guy. ....and this is the woman who when she broke things off with me wanted us to be "best friends" (hell no). Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hafer Posted February 14, 2012 Author Share Posted February 14, 2012 I believe that if I deliver the juice maker myself, I will avoid future attemps from her to break NC, So I want to do it as soon as possible. Also, Im not sure if she knows how harsh she is been with me, I think she is very inmature emotionally Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hafer Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 We bought a guinea pig, which Im taking care of right now, and I think she might use it as a way to break NC Link to post Share on other sites
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