dipatty Posted February 17, 2012 Share Posted February 17, 2012 (edited) Hi everyone, I came across this forum looking for some solid advice about a past relationship...and I thought I'd give it a go! I dated this guy for about 6 months, things moved very quickly...and only after a week of dating, we were official. It was all stars and rainbows. Everything worked perfectly and it was all effortless...rose colored glasses thing going on. We were very compatible with one another. All along us dating, I communicated with my ex from a previous relationship that ended years ago. This made the current boyfriend very uncomfortable, but I felt as though he needed to trust me. I shared with him our conversations I would have to quell any belief he had that I would cheat and/or leave. I now regret this very much. Our relationship ended very suddenly, out of the blue almost, and I was left with "I'm sorry, but I think you have unfinished business with your ex." "I also feel that we have grown into friends." I left it at that and moved on. I always missed him, but I respected his space. One day, I was curious and I texted him asking him why he really left and why he hasn't contacted me. He informed me that he was actually arrested while we dated and was too paranoid to tell me. (I'm currently a law student, and he felt I would have left him). I told him that he was silly and I wish he would have told me that as the reason he left, because he said his life was unmanagable at the moment and that he never lost feelings for me. He wasn't arrested on anything serious, I read the blurp in the paper. I left him alone for a couple of weeks and decided that I would write him a letter. It was very short and sweet, nothing too intense and told him that I really missed him. He contacted me shortly and texted me "thank you for the letter, it was really sweet and meant a lot ot me." I left it alone for a day. Today, I texted him and we began chatting. Long story short, he said he was very depressed about ending our relationship, and that he regrets it sometimes. He said that he was so overwhelmed with the legal situation that he needed to be alone and couldn't handle a relationship. he also stated that he was very paranoid about my ex. I asked him if he would be ok with re-establishing a friendship/communication and I informed him that I am no longer friends with my ex and I apologized for making him feel paranoid. He agreed to be open for a friendship and that he missed me as a friend and that he had so much he wanted to tell me. I told him that I felt as though our relationship went way too fast and that I would do a lot of things differently now, if given the chance. he agree and said the same. he then said that he feels we could start from scratch again and take it one step at a time. I told him I would call him next week. I asked him if he was goign to disappear again and he said "No I won't, I promise ." How should I handle this? I want to see if he still has feelings for me, but I don't want to scare him away... Do you think we have a possibility of working this out? I really do miss him and I now understand the mistakes I have made. Edited February 17, 2012 by dipatty Link to post Share on other sites
jerbear Posted February 17, 2012 Share Posted February 17, 2012 Friendship yes, relationship working out probably no. Link to post Share on other sites
zerovandez Posted February 17, 2012 Share Posted February 17, 2012 I think anything is possible. Just take it slow this time around as you both agreed to it. Link to post Share on other sites
leannesagoodman Posted February 17, 2012 Share Posted February 17, 2012 I personally think that any relationship can work again, if you're both committed to it. And it sounds like you would be. This time round it sounds like you're both willing to change some things, so as long as you move slowly enough, and you're both careful, I think there is a possibility it could work out. It could go either way, but I think there's a chance for every relationship if you both want the same thing Link to post Share on other sites
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