philt Posted February 19, 2012 Share Posted February 19, 2012 i am having a fight with my girlfriend at the minute because a friend of a friend made a joke on facebook about having sex with her and then about teaching her new things as well . i said i dont like jokes like that about someone having sex with my girlfriend and she said its only a joke and im being over sensitive . i trust her and love her with all my heart, i cant help that i dont like jokes like this and they make me really uncomfortable . i need to know am i being over the top or am i right that thats not a normal thing to joke about Link to post Share on other sites
Professor X Posted February 19, 2012 Share Posted February 19, 2012 i am having a fight with my girlfriend at the minute because a friend of a friend made a joke on facebook about having sex with her and then about teaching her new things as well . i said i dont like jokes like that about someone having sex with my girlfriend and she said its only a joke and im being over sensitive . i trust her and love her with all my heart, i cant help that i dont like jokes like this and they make me really uncomfortable . i need to know am i being over the top or am i right that thats not a normal thing to joke about My personal opinion is that you are right to feel the way you do. That friend, whoever he is, crossed the line, big time, to the point where several guys I know would actually beat him for that. And as for your GF, I think she's under-reacting, moreover, I personally don't like it that she's siding with her friend about it (i.e. tells you to chill instead of telling that friend to take it off). Truth is, something feels off here. Link to post Share on other sites
Author philt Posted February 19, 2012 Author Share Posted February 19, 2012 thanks im starting to feel like im going crazy , i said i can't ever see any guy wanting another guy to say things like that about the girlfriend or wife Link to post Share on other sites
Author philt Posted February 19, 2012 Author Share Posted February 19, 2012 i would love to hear from a few girls what they think is it a guy think or am i right Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted February 19, 2012 Share Posted February 19, 2012 You can't control what other people say or do. This guy was out of line for saying that to someone who's in a relationship, even if it was meant as a joke, but for you to go ballistic about this is probably not a good idea. You should have posted on FB a friendly warning to back off, she's taken, and that should have been the end of it. Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted February 20, 2012 Share Posted February 20, 2012 I doubt that if the roles had been reversed that your girlfriend would think it was so funny. I agree that something if off here. It seems very very odd that a guy would write such a thing. This is really strange and unusual. Link to post Share on other sites
nofool4u Posted February 20, 2012 Share Posted February 20, 2012 i am having a fight with my girlfriend at the minute because a friend of a friend made a joke on facebook about having sex with her and then about teaching her new things as well . i said i dont like jokes like that about someone having sex with my girlfriend and she said its only a joke and im being over sensitive . i trust her and love her with all my heart, i cant help that i dont like jokes like this and they make me really uncomfortable . i need to know am i being over the top or am i right that thats not a normal thing to joke about No, you are not over the top. Now if your gf were upset that they were talking like that about her and wanted to give this guy a piece of her mind, then yes, it would be over the top. But looks as if she likes this attention. You think she'd like someone getting on facebook and saying they loved sucking you off the other night? I don't think so. No, its not normal to joke about. But I bet if this were a guy that she found unattractive, she'd be pissed. This is a red flag and you are not being over the top to be upset about it knowing that your gf doesn't care if other guys joke about having sex with her and teaching her new things. She likes it. Link to post Share on other sites
phineas Posted February 20, 2012 Share Posted February 20, 2012 You can't control what other people say or do. This guy was out of line for saying that to someone who's in a relationship, even if it was meant as a joke, but for you to go ballistic about this is probably not a good idea. You should have posted on FB a friendly warning to back off, she's taken, and that should have been the end of it. Yeah, a drama induced E-fight over a woman. Pure class. How about his GF delete the comment & block the guy? If he's creeped her FB page then he knows she is in a relationship with the OP. He has zero respect for boundaries and any decent woman in a relationship would be turned off by such a creeps advances. Unless, she likes the guys attention. Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted February 20, 2012 Share Posted February 20, 2012 Yeah, a drama induced E-fight over a woman. Pure class. How about his GF delete the comment & block the guy? If he's creeped her FB page then he knows she is in a relationship with the OP. He has zero respect for boundaries and any decent woman in a relationship would be turned off by such a creeps advances. Unless, she likes the guys attention. She probably IS flattered by the attention and the comment, but I do think it was meant more as a joke than a come on. I'm not suggesting any argument on FB, I'm suggesting one comment from either her or the bf to say "back off, she's taken." And I don't believe it's possible to delete comments posted by others on her FB page--that's why I suggested a comment in response to put a stop to it is appropriate. Maybe I'm mistaken about that since I don't use FB myself, but I was under the impression comments cannot be deleted once they are posted on someone's page. Link to post Share on other sites
phineas Posted February 20, 2012 Share Posted February 20, 2012 She probably IS flattered by the attention and the comment, but I do think it was meant more as a joke than a come on. I'm not suggesting any argument on FB, I'm suggesting one comment from either her or the bf to say "back off, she's taken." And I don't believe it's possible to delete comments posted by others on her FB page--that's why I suggested a comment in response to put a stop to it is appropriate. Maybe I'm mistaken about that since I don't use FB myself, but I was under the impression comments cannot be deleted once they are posted on someone's page. If someone comments on a photo or comments on a post you can delete it. If they put something directly on your wall It looks like you can only comment on it & not delete (I just checked). So I guess her calling the guy a creep then unfriending him is really the only solution because joke or not it isn't cool & i've had friends in real life put out of the group for saying things like that to someone's GF. It's crossing the line & OP's girl needs to protect her own borders. OP shouldn't have to police their relationship. Though i've seen to some really pathetic FB fights & I've unfriended those people because I don't want that stupid on my wall. Link to post Share on other sites
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 20, 2012 Share Posted February 20, 2012 I wish your girlfriend would have told the guy she didn't appreciate that comment posted on FB - and removed it immediately. Link to post Share on other sites
nofool4u Posted February 20, 2012 Share Posted February 20, 2012 She probably IS flattered by the attention and the comment A red flag goes up to those that like that kind of flattery and attention when they already have a significant other. but I do think it was meant more as a joke than a come on. Thats something you don't joke about. I'm not suggesting any argument on FB, I'm suggesting one comment from either her or the bf to say "back off, she's taken." If that is the comment you think is needed, then one would have to admit it wasn't "just a joke". NEVER would I joke about having sex and teaching someone something new sexually if they had a boyfriend. Hell, I wouldn't do it even if they weren't taken. And the fact that she defends the comment is all too telling. Link to post Share on other sites
nofool4u Posted February 20, 2012 Share Posted February 20, 2012 I wish your girlfriend would have told the guy she didn't appreciate that comment posted on FB - and removed it immediately. There is a reason she didn't tell the other guy that. She liked it. Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted February 20, 2012 Share Posted February 20, 2012 Ick. Yeah I'd be upset if a girl made a comment like that on my BFs wall. If he didn't delete it right away, I'd ask him to. If he LIKED it?! Well, we'd have a problem. The only reason someone makes a sexual joke like that to someone else is because they somehow know it's kosher between the 2 of them to do so...I'd assume there's a history of flirtatiousness between the two of them. Why won't she delete it? Did you ask her to? Link to post Share on other sites
Author philt Posted February 21, 2012 Author Share Posted February 21, 2012 The guy is her friends ex and he's almost 40 she's 24 and I'm 30 and he's like it with alot of girl and I know there's nothing going on a trust her 100% and we have both said sorry and stopped fighting but I have left it that I don't like things like that said I think it's really out of line but everyone always go's oh it only d£&);£) he's just like that he's only joking Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts