cdanner09 Posted February 22, 2012 Share Posted February 22, 2012 My boyfriend and I live together and I am feeling a little unsteady about the relationship at this point. I have found several messages to other girls where he flirts shamelessly and continuously asks them to go out with him. When asked if he has a girlfriend, he always says negative things about me - like "we've grown apart, she's more of a roommate" or "I don't really have feelings for her anymore, but I live with her Im stuck". I've confronted him about this before but he insists that nothing has ever happened, that he just likes to flirt and it's all in fun and he's never actually gone out with any of them. Two of our mutual guy friends have also confronted him about it and he insists he's never cheated on me. I recently found some text messages from last month where he had made arrangements with callgirls for "sensual massages" and "rubdowns" and "upgrades". THese have made me wonder about whether I should continue the relationship. He treats me good, goes out of his way to make me happy. He constantly tells me how I'm the most gorgeous thing he has ever seen and we have a great sex life. We have talked about marriage and he tells me I am the love of his life, so why is he doing these things? Am I being lied to? Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted February 22, 2012 Share Posted February 22, 2012 Yes. He's lying. More than that YOU are lying to yourself. He doesn't treat you well - quite the contrary. You deserve better - why aren't you requiring that from yourself? Link to post Share on other sites
Author cdanner09 Posted February 22, 2012 Author Share Posted February 22, 2012 It's just so hard when you love someone so much, it's like all I see is the good in him because it hurts less that way. Link to post Share on other sites
Mme. Chaucer Posted February 22, 2012 Share Posted February 22, 2012 Right. It's "fun" to make disparaging remarks about his "girlfriend" to other girls he's trying to bone? That doesn't sound like "fun" to me. Is it fun for you? If not, bag the loser. Sheesh. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kwayne Posted February 22, 2012 Share Posted February 22, 2012 Girl, get out! I tell my bf that he's allowed to flirt to random girls because I don't really mind and I flirt with random guys. And when I say random, I mean the ones you talk to once and never give/ get a number from. If you feel like you have to go through his phone to find out what he might be doing with other girls, it's a sign of alert. I went through my bf's phone to see what his ex was saying about me. Now, I wish I hadn't, but when I told my bf what I did (feeling awful going behind his back) he comforted me, not by feeding me with "you're beautiful" but he named everything good about me that I didn't even realize I do! If your bf doesn't love the small things you do, besides your body/ face/ hair, you need to rethink your relationship. Do you put more of an effort? Do you always fix the problem? Do you always plan dates? How does he try to keep you interested in him? Is he actually putting in 50%? Don't lie to yourself, everyone deserves a true relationship and maybe it's just not with him. There's better fish in the sea. Link to post Share on other sites
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