feelingselfish Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 HI all, I need some help and quick, I was with a man 4 years ago for a very brief time about 4 months, we had a great time. We had so much fun in and out of the bed room. there was lots of passion. We parted as I moved home when i finished college. We then met a few more times for dirty weekends but in the mean time I found a wonderful man which I am set to marry next year and we have decided we want to try for a baby. However (nothings ever simple) I have always stayed in contact with the first guy, he knows all about my current partner and we have just acted like friends UNTILL last week when, as usual we got talking and out of no where he tells me how much he regrets letting me go and that he compares all women he meets to me and is living in hope that I will leave my partner and go running to him!!! this has stirred up major feelings in me as Iv never been able to 100% let him go. I constantly think about him, I cant understand why this is as we only knew each other for a very short period of time and have not seen each other in 4 years!! I really truely love my partner, thats why I feel so guilty for even thinking of this other guy...... anyone ever been in this situation and if so when you do? Link to post Share on other sites
Spark1111 Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 I think you have to realize that you are comparing a four month fling with a few stolen weekends with a real, everyday, relationship. The fact that your friend is telling you NOW, when he had all that opportunity to pursue you for a full time relationship, speaks volumes about how he will miss the sexual chemistry you too shared. And, that's about it. Otherwise, you'd be marrying him. So I think you devote your heart and soul and emotions to the man you claim is a greatguy devoted to you today, every day. And I think, if you are serious about this, then you have to say buh-buy to dirty weekend man. The fantasy of him will always be a huge threat to your current relationship. Lose his number, email address, and all forms of contact. The one that got a way is only a fantasy. If he wanted you FOR you, he wouldn't have walked away. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 It's clear to me you are still in love with your ex and vice versa. You need to call off the engagement and come clean to your fiance about your feelings. If you go through with the marriage and a child you will not be able to sustain because your ex will constantly be on your mind. Especially if the passion is greater with your ex than your fiance. Everyday married life and raising a child is hard and you have to be with someone you know you want to be with in order to be happy. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
RickFox Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 Commit fully to your soon to be Husband or let him go. If you choose to stay then release the other man from your life....... Link to post Share on other sites
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