my girl is confused about her feelings

[PilsD17]

Need Advice:

Ive was w/ this girl for about a year and 4 months. Everything was perfect in the beginning. She told me she loved me after 4 months of dating even though i didnt feel that way at the time. But that didnt matter to her, she still told she loved me and that she would never not even think about letting me go. ive done everything in my reach to do everything i can to be good to this girl.i love her, i fell for the way she was everything she did for me how she understood me, it was a perfect relationship. it got to the point that we were thinkin about marriage and planning everything out because we were in love and that she was sure i was the one the guy she said she always wanted. after the year things started to feel a little different. yes she loved me and so did i but it was all different. i like to know the truth as it is and no going around it. she didnt seem to liket the fact that i would ask her questions when she spoke with her high school friends. she would take it all wrong and assume that i was jealous. i admit i am a little jealous just like any guy is who is with the girl they love. but im not extremely jealous as she probably thought i was.

thin is one night were on the phone and one little argument about this guy who called her, was all it took. She then told me she needed time apart by herself to think of what she wants because she is confused. i am lost i dont even know how she took this drastic decision, one day she is lost in love with me the next day she wants time to think. should i wait for her or should i leave her completely. its been a week and a half and she still doesnt know what she wants.

[hurtingandconfused]

There are two options your ex has. She either breaks up with you forever or she stays with you. Most of the time when women(men do it too) are confused and choose to stay with their s/o they remain uphappy. She has to lose you before she can miss you.

 

Anyhow, sometimes they realize that they made the right decision and they will never want you back.

 

You should never wait for someone. Life is too short to put yourself on hold for someone. She has to grow up and learn how to lose someone.

 

In this type of case most women 99.99999999% of them break up with their b/fs. My advice is to prepare for the worst.

 

its been a week and a half and she still doesnt know what she wants.

Believe me on this one. It takes women years and years and years before they realize what they really want.

[Unlucky In Love]

I completely agree. One of the big problems in the world today is that no one respects anyone else's relationship. Obviously, you and your girlfriend have been together for over a year, but that doesn't stop other guys from calling her and trying to break you guys up. Either she is interested in you and only you, or she still wants to shop around for a while. There's no reason for you to try to rush into marriage when she obviously isn't ready.

 

I had this same problem in my last relationship. I was completely in love with my boyfriend. He said that he loved me too, but he still had other girls calling him on the phone. I tried to go forward with our relationship anyway and demanded a commitment. We moved in together, but his interest in talking to other girls didn't end. We just ended up fighting all the time and we called off our marriage plans.

 

Your girlfriend obviously isn't ready to make the kind of commitment you want. You won't be able to wisk her away by marrying her either. You need to give her time to investigate her feelings with other people and play the field some yourself. There are plenty of girls I know just dying to meet a guy who wants to make a strong commitment. The right girl will be lucky to have you!

[dudesomewhere]

it's always in my estimation that when someone isn't sure, it's that they don't want to be mean rather than not really knowing.

 

Reading comments from all over by women, this does tend to be the consensus. I would assume this to be the case for men as well. However I do know when people think they've made a wrong decision when they've let someone go, but to me that is also a case of them only thinking that when they are without someone in their lives...so they look back on the person they let go as a substitute.

 

In my case I never wait around. I'll wait around for friendship though but not romance or romantic intimacy. Even if I SHOULD wait around to get free nookie I don't....I'm disturbed I know . I also have what I would consider a strange sort of jealously in that I don't really get jealous. I'll observe situations and then inquire about them and based on the outcome I go from there. So if I ask someone a simple logical question and they get defensive, I'm out of there. Defensiveness is most often times the shield to guilt.