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Was I wrong to snoop?


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Long story short.

 

A week ago I saw my boyfriend get a text from a girl calling him baby and flirting with him on a friday night. He didn't respond because I was sitting right next to him but I asked him about it. He said it was just a friend and I said it's not right to speak that way to any other girl then me. He agreed and said he wont talk to her again and deleted all of his texts.

 

Last night I was with him and saw her name in the more recent people he text messaged. There was not any text I saw. Just her name in the scroll. So he deleted it. But I still felt as though he did text her and then just deleted it, or he got a text from her and deleted it. But there was definately some text from him or her between them yesterday.

 

Today is his birthday and I snooped on his phone. She wrote a message 'happy birthday babe!! hope your having an amazing day' xx.. I am sorry but friends do not kiss kiss friends and call them babe. Esp since my bf says they are more antiquates now.

 

I called him out. He twisted around like I was the bad guy for snooping (which i admitted was terrible and I wish I didnt) and he got so mad that he never adressed the origional issue of the girl and then left saying he needs space and that he cant trust me any more.

 

I think he is being over dramatic and kinda still hiding something. if anything I should be the one who cant trust him. But im willing to work though things and I like to talk things out.

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jnj express

He is messing around on you---you probably have no right to snoop PRIOR to mge., after that you would have a complete right to know everything---but for now---you need to decide which way you wanna go

 

He is keeping up a contact with this girl, he just used the privacy issue to steamroll you, and take the heat off himself

 

You need to probably demand NC, or tell him you are moving on----sometimes you just need to be very harsh about how you handle cheating

 

Also depends upon the status of your relationship---if its serious, then make your demands and stick to them---if not so serious, well then you need to decide how you want to deal with his continued contact with another filly.

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It doesn't matter if you were "right" to snoop or not. The fact is, he is having inappropriate contact with another woman, and refuses to do much about it.

 

He's made it clear that he doesn't want to address this issue.

 

So, it's your call on whether you accept it or not. Personally, I wouldn't. People need boundaries in relationships, and if he's crossed yours and doesn't care so much, then you know all you need to know about the kind of partner he wants to be to you.

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