strange situation with a female friend

[yankees51988]

So I moved to a new town and a while ago this girl I have mutual friends with hit me up to hang out and we ended up becoming pretty good friends and drinking buddies. She has serious boyfriend and I ended up hooking up with her once at a party but even though she was def hot I never really felt sexually attracted, just kinda hooked up with her for the hell of it cause we were sharing a bed and she was getting all touchy. Nothing weird came of it, still friends that party all the time and it didn't change our friendship at all.

 

Ok so fast forward a month or two.. turns out this girl has an even hotter sister who she introduces me to at a party. Now this one I am attracted to. We really hit it off and started hanging out a lot, in fact I didn't really hang out with the first one for a while after this. So now the sister is calling and texting me every day to hang out. She has a boyfriend but they are on the rocks and about to break up (they did soon after). She would always lie and ditch this boyfriend to come hang out with me. Now these girls are both are on the slutty side and have hooked up with a bunch of my friends. Having just moved, instead of hooking up with this girl who had been with a bunch of friends, I would rather just have her set me up with her friends and have her as a friend. Me and this girl ended up becoming good friends but there was always very heavy flirting. We'd flirt nonstop and just stare at each other all the time and if we were sitting on a couch we'd always end up pushed right against each other and neither of us would move. It always seemed like there was some sexual tension. Still, this is a girl I would NEVER have a relationship with, and I do just want to be friends, though a FWB situation or just getting dirty once had definitely crossed my mind, and we both seemed to want to ****. All my friends said we were definitely going to but I always tried really hard to keep myself in check. We're both fun loving and open people and would always joke around about having sex with each other. For example one night we were trying to figure out what bar to go to she jokingly suggested just staying in and banging all night. Another time I was talking to her about a girl I had sex with and she was like "it should be me" all jokingly. I definitely would say similar stuff back. I always say stuff like this to close female friends, even if I don't have the intention of sleeping with them.

 

So one night after drinking I tell her to stay over or whatever and shes all like "ohhh my boyfriend would love that haha". I wasn't going to try to have sex with her because we were hanging out every day and introducing casual sex when you are hanging out that much negatively effected the last two close female friendships I have. I just wanted to be friends but it seemed like we both wanted to do it and sometimes i would have to try my hardest not to try anything or there were a few times I was just waiting for her to jump me. She broke up with the boyfriend soon after and one night I suggested sex but she didn't stay and ended up hanging out with some guy. Not awkward at all, friendship stayed exactly the same and all. Ok, so no problem I don't want a relationship with the girl, and while I do wanna bang her I was trying not to let myself so it's whatever. I joke around this to her sister I had previously hooked up with, and she is like "she doesn't want to have sex with you".

 

Now we're hanging out one night at a friends watching a movie and she's trying to cuddle up with me. I just lay there and try to behave myself but before long she's all "do you think I'm sexy?" and trying to stick her hand down my pants which I stopped her. I would have definitely let it ride had it been like a month earlier but we had been hanging out like everyday and I didn't wanna ruin another good friendship with sex, also my ego got in the way a little cause I was like "If I didn't get it when I was horny and wanted it, then neither will you". So we kept hanging out with no change after that but eventually instead of her calling me everyday to hang out our friendship started to fade out. We haven't really talked in a few months except for a "lets catch up", but I haven't really tried too hard to initiate anything cause I never really had to when she'd call everyday. So did our friendship begin dying because there was sexual tension we never acted on? Something else? Did she realize I wasn't going to bang her so she stopped hanging out as friends all the time (even though I would've easily had sex with her if it was a little sooner than when she tried)? Lol that sounds funny...

[JesseJames]

It is amazing that your principles didn't make her rape you with foreign objects.

 

hee hee hee You both should be cool yet I would think. However, the killer in the grass is probably just spending too much time together and in those settings, and so then now simple indifference may be creeping in.

[hotloader]

She has serious boyfriend and I ended up hooking up with her once at a party

 

Knowingly messing around with some other dude's girlfriend is a good way to get your head stomped in or worse. Why would you wanna complicate your life like that, man? Women are enough of a pain in the ass to deal with as they are, but the last thing any guy needs to do is to go around....in a new town.....intentionally making waves like that just to get laid. Way to ask for trouble, dumbass.

[spiderowl]

All the other complications aside - boyfriends, sister of someone you've messed around with, etc. - I would think she lost interest as you weren't willling to take it further when she was. Also, it sounds like you expect women to do all the running. Maybe you are good-looking and have had your choice of women up until recently. However 'slutty' you may decide a woman is, she is still capable of deciding when a guy is not interested enough in her to pay her attention or that he can't be bothered contacting her. In other words, when he seems self-absorbed and doesn't care about her. You don't seem too bothered about the moral side of things and I sense a distinct lack of empathy with the women. Eventually, they will twig this.

 

I think you expected this woman to carry on chasing you and now she hasn't you're wondering what went wrong.