anger & frustration

[ammie]

i wish i could scream and i'd feel better but i've tried and it doesn't work. sometimes i get so angry and i don't even know why i am so angry. i get angry when i am trying to do something and it don't come out right, i get angry at my boyfriend because at times i want to leave him then other times i don't, i get angry at where i live, my medical problems, my self-esteem or lack of it, my work.

 

oh hell the list could go on forever. i just don't understand why i can't seem to deal with things anymore. im in my fourties and frustrated about my life, my boyfriend, the state i live in (physically) and mentally.

 

i don't feel depressed just frustrated that things don't go right. sometimes i just want to have a lit'l temper tantrum to get this horrible anxiety out of me, this tension from my body that i don't even know where or when or why it is there.

 

sometimes when i am trying to do something on the "puter and it goes too slow or i get kicked off or it locks up, i literally want to slam this stupid mouse against the wall, but i don't, not yet anyway, but i have slammed it down and it cost me $10.00, so i learned on that one.

 

i am not even a violent person, i've never been in a physical fight in my whole life, but now i wish i could beat the schmidt out of someone. i don't drink but maybe i should get drunk and let go of some inhibitions.

 

i do things that i don't want to do so my boyfriend don't get drunk, i go places that i don't want to go so he don't get drunk. yes i'm a control freak, i'm insecure, i obsess about things that i wish i didn't even think about, i hold back things i would love to say to people, but i'm rather polite and very reserved.

 

i'm also so shy, i hate myself for it, i want to get out on the dance floor and shake my butt and have a good ole time, and laugh with everybody. instead i sit there quietly analysing and assessing the whole situation, only wanting to be out of it if i can't be in.

 

i know i sound pathetic even hopeless, but i don't like being this way, i want to feel alive and have fun and live each day as it were my last. instead i live in this insecure world of anxiety, fear, shyness, aprehension, anger and frustration.

 

the only thing good coming into my life is my grand baby, due any day now. and i can't wait to have that lit'l baby to love and hold and to look forward to loving and helping my daughter. but am i sane enough? i hope so.

 

what can i do? i'm not depressed, i love, i laugh, i am happy, but i am also these other things and i can't stand them anymore. since when did life get so hard?

[Tony T]

Life has always been the same. Your way of looking at it has changed over the years.

 

If we engage is negative thinking patterns over many years and begin to awfulize about every small situation or circumstance that befalls us, we soon find ourselves drowning in tiny thorns of anxiety, fear, depression, etc.

 

My suggestion is you learn relaxation techniques to help you put things into perspective. Go to a good book store and get some tapes on hypnosis and meditation. Attend workshops where meditation and relaxation techniques are taught. This will heal you and bring you back to living a fulfilling life.

 

We can talk outselves into a corner at any time. All during the Clinton presidency, the president has had investigations, crisis, depositions, indictments of those close to him and an impeachment trial. During all of these adversities, he has stood tall, smiled, has done his job well, and has handled the most stressful job in the world as if he had not a problem in the world.

 

Maybe he is not the best role model, but Clinton's ability to stay calm in the worst of circumstances should be an example for you that it can be done.

 

A few months ago, I was feeling very down, very depressed, and very troubled about how things were going in general. Driving my car, I stopped at a red light. A blind lady with a guide stick made her way across the street, directly in front of my car. Though she could not see a thing and probably has no hope of ever having sight, she seemed happy and intent on getting where she was going...not even a guide dog...just a stick. At that moment, I was able to put my problems into perspective and I felt so much better. I could see, I had my sight, I could walk, I could breathe, I could taste, I was alive.

 

Learn how to relax and learn how to put your troubles into perspective. But a poster depicting many galaxies in the Universe. When to start to feel overwhelmed, look at the poster and see just how insignificant our problems are here on this earth compared with the vastness of the universe. While we are here and while we can enjoy good food and good friends, let's do it!!!

[Deejette]

As Tony says, life has always been the same. There are always lots of things that are not perfect, people don't behave the way we want them to, the weather rains on our parade, we don't win the lottery. It is how we react to all these things that makes the difference in our lives. Sure it is frustrating to feel that we are victims of things we cannot change. That is why St. Francis' prayer (loosely quoted) is so helpful, "Lord, Grant me the serenity to change the things that can be changed, accept the things that cannot be changed, and the wisdom to know the difference."

 

If we react emotionally to all the disappointments and frustrations in our lives, we will live in a state of perpetual anger. Letting go and accepting that things will not always go our way and being grateful for the things that do (even being grateful for the things that don't go our way but that we learn from) is the only way to deal with this situation.

Life has always been the same. Your way of looking at it has changed over the years. If we engage is negative thinking patterns over many years and begin to awfulize about every small situation or circumstance that befalls us, we soon find ourselves drowning in tiny thorns of anxiety, fear, depression, etc. My suggestion is you learn relaxation techniques to help you put things into perspective. Go to a good book store and get some tapes on hypnosis and meditation. Attend workshops where meditation and relaxation techniques are taught. This will heal you and bring you back to living a fulfilling life. We can talk outselves into a corner at any time. All during the Clinton presidency, the president has had investigations, crisis, depositions, indictments of those close to him and an impeachment trial. During all of these adversities, he has stood tall, smiled, has done his job well, and has handled the most stressful job in the world as if he had not a problem in the world. Maybe he is not the best role model, but Clinton's ability to stay calm in the worst of circumstances should be an example for you that it can be done. A few months ago, I was feeling very down, very depressed, and very troubled about how things were going in general. Driving my car, I stopped at a red light. A blind lady with a guide stick made her way across the street, directly in front of my car. Though she could not see a thing and probably has no hope of ever having sight, she seemed happy and intent on getting where she was going...not even a guide dog...just a stick. At that moment, I was able to put my problems into perspective and I felt so much better. I could see, I had my sight, I could walk, I could breathe, I could taste, I was alive. Learn how to relax and learn how to put your troubles into perspective. But a poster depicting many galaxies in the Universe. When to start to feel overwhelmed, look at the poster and see just how insignificant our problems are here on this earth compared with the vastness of the universe. While we are here and while we can enjoy good food and good friends, let's do it!!!