Veryconfused12345 Posted March 13, 2012 Share Posted March 13, 2012 Hi there, Well I've made the transition from the break up posts to personal development so that might be some progress in itself? Not entirely sure. I'm struggling a bit and could really use some insight/advice as I'm feeling terribly lost at the moment. So the long and short of it is about 6 months ago my fiance broke up with me and with it, the life I was so excited to have disappeared too. I had to leave my home of many years and start fresh in a new city. I'm doing ok here-I have an interesting job I thoroughly enjoy, am making contacts with a nice group of people, and am financially stable. For the first time in months I feel like I don't wake up in a panic. But I just don't know how to ever completely let go of past failed relationships, especially this last one. I literally have panic attacks and am so fixated on recovering or finding someone I can love just as much that it's become all consuming. I've tried medication and speaking to someone but it's just not working. All I can think is despite all the good in my life right now, it's all for nothing as I don't have the person who I wanted to spend my life with. I'm really stuck in a rut with this. Everything could be going along perfectly but because I feel like I've experienced such a great loss, I don't know how not to fixate on that as why I will never be fully happy. I don't want to get back into the dating game and I don't want my life to be defined by being miserable every time a relationship fails. I wonder, does anyone else ever experience this sense of emptiness that comes with losing a loved one? It's like a constant nagging anxiety and its truly exhausting... Thanks so much for taking the time to read this. Link to post Share on other sites
betterdeal Posted March 13, 2012 Share Posted March 13, 2012 Tell me your earliest happy memory. Something from your childhood. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Veryconfused12345 Posted March 13, 2012 Author Share Posted March 13, 2012 My earliest memory? Probably running around my backyard as a child? Nothing particularly exciting I'm afraid... Why do you ask? Link to post Share on other sites
betterdeal Posted March 13, 2012 Share Posted March 13, 2012 It's something I do to cheer myself up: think of a good memory. Ruminating is a bind, and thinking about something that makes me smile helps counter it. Did you feel any better when you recalled playing in the back yard? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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