restricted by weight.

[Chs]

So my reason for being on this forum is that i 5 months ago ended the longest and most serious relationship of my life.

It was with a really beautiful and sweet girl, and i thought i was so lucky to be with her.

 

Fast forward to now she is in another relationship and i have finally accepted it, i met a girl and we started texting about a week ago. It's been pretty nice, i have been flirting with her mostly getting very little back in that sense, but we have good chemistry and we fit in many ways like same type of humor and banter. But yesterday she finally mentioned my weight, as im a very skinny guy. I think i look alright myself, im tall and dark haired with a "pretty" face or whatever, but im so skinny and not only does it make me insecure as hell it has also made it so hard for me to find a girl.

 

Now i feel really depressed again, i was starting to like this girl and im already thinking alot about her but i want her out of my head as she is obviously not interrested in being with me. Im just scared i won't find anyone again.

[Leigh 87]

How thin are ya?

 

If it would make u feel better, gain weight, even if it is extremely hard..

 

 

If you eat 6000 calories a day and do not gain, THEN u might have a metabolic issue, in which case u need to see a doctor.

 

U know, there are high calorie supplements u can have between meals, that can make u gain, without the bulk of food.

 

 

Yes, u will be loved for who you are, but if your scarily thin, you will probably feel more confident if you worked out if it is possible to gain weight, and then attempted to.

 

If you cannot gain even on a very high calorie diet/ with profession help, there are plenty of girls who will love u for who you are, regardless of being skinny:)

[Chs]

I'm a 186cm tall and i weight 65 kg's only which puts me at the lowet end of a normal BMI. Thing is im very slim naturally so it's not like im totally bony, im just not very broad around the waist and shoulders and so on. I personally think i look okay without my shirt on, and it's mostly my legs that lack size, but apparantly alot of girls are turned off by it.

 

I have been working out 4 days a week for now 6 months and i am definetly getting stronger but im not gaining weight, because i simply can't afford to eat enough per day due to my high rent and low income and im unable to work until i finish school since im not very good at doing stuff all the time (especially not when depressed)

 

I just never cared for my weight and didn't care much for girls or love when i was younger, but now i do and it just takes too damn long to put on weight. I have absolutely no motivation anymore, because im lifting about the same as my buddy and i have been increasing my performance way more than him but he is still so big compared to me... I'm just annoyed at

[nick d]

If you want to gain weight, start hitting the gym 3-4 days a week and lifting weights. And order a supplement called "muscle juice" (not to be confused with muscle milk) drink two shakes a day and work out and I guarantee you'll gain weight!

[Leigh 87]

oooh, well it is a major turn ON when a guy works out and is fit!!!

 

Mannn, u will have girls, no problems

 

 

Quality girls go for guys based on their personalities, not so much on looks. I have seen plenty of girls who are with skinny guys - plenty of cute, great girls are with skinny men.

 

 

If your working out and are healthy, you will find a decent girl:)

 

I find a well built guy who is lazy and unhealthy more of a turn off, thana naturally small boned dude, who works out and is fit and strong.

 

 

NUTS are a cheap and energy dense way to get lots of calories in.

 

Are you allergic to nuts?

 

If not, eat:

 

- peanut butter and exlore other nut butters

 

Also

 

-always buy full fat cheese, milk, etc

 

- add extra table spoons of oil to meals ( 1 tablespoon to pasta, rice, stir fries)

 

- eat frequently so u get calories in

 

 

 

 

I have always wondered what it would be like, to have your problem hehee, but I do knot that you struggle the same way a naturally large person battles with.

 

 

And yes - it would be bloody expensive to eat all that food!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Please try high calorie, non filling shakes plz:)

 

u never know, they might be affordable, and taste ok!!

 

I have never had them myself, but if u like milshakes, the gain shakes might be something like that.

 

 

I really urge u to google stuff and type in " cheap ways to gain weight:"

 

Do not concern yourself with theh igh fat content, just keep the food clean, and work out and stay fit.

 

Some people are concerned about high fat, but I am not one of them. I think chemical ladden food is more harmful than naturally fatty crap.

 

 

Just do your own research:)

 

 

I would go for a skinny guy, and plenty of girls would and do, so just try to make an impression and be proud of who u r, and try to block out the negative impact u think being skinny has.

 

 

Perhaps go for skinny girls? I am 58 kilos, normally 56 and I am 5 ' 5, but a lot of girls are heavier, and I have heard girls say that they feel un - feminine if their partner weighs less than them!

 

Why don't u seek out petite girls? U may not feel so sinny after all:P

[Chs]

My beat friend is an educated diet and fitness coach and bodybuilder so i already know all the tricks for galning weight. But right now it just isnt working for me. And actually the girl i was talking to is very petite. But during some texting we were joking about her being Jesus and she said "i can teach you how to walk on water, oh wait, you are so light you can just fly over!" and it just made me feel angry and immasculated. I really like her but i guess im just not her type, time to move on huh.

[chsavage]

Maybe it's time to move on, but maybe she just made a mistake when flirting back with you and she didn't realize how that sounded. It's very difficult to judge a person's tone through text message. There's absolutely nothing wrong with at least continuing a friendship with her since you two do seem to get along very well with one another, and maybe next time you hang out you could go to the gym together so she can actually see you in action. That might just be enough to get over what she thinks of you being "Too skinny".

[Feelin Frisky]

I have the opposite problem. I'm heavy and struggle. I've only been "normal" for about 10% of my life and was obese (thanks to my mother medicating me with food to shut me up as a baby) before I had any sense of choice or proportion. I think I'd rather the skinniness that the heaviness. I work out 6 or 7 days a week and my weight is distributed and I "carry it well" as people say but it just doesn't seem to want to go away and stay away. If you want gain weight and don't have the money to eat fancy, just make it a habit of eating before bed. I do not over-eat most of the--I do however have a drive to have ice cream or peanut butter and sugar which I act out on and it keeps me from losing weight and puts weight on if I don't work extra hard to burn it up. Sleep on your carbs and you'll gain weight.

[Leigh 87]

My beat friend is an educated diet and fitness coach and bodybuilder so i already know all the tricks for galning weight. But right now it just isnt working for me. And actually the girl i was talking to is very petite. But during some texting we were joking about her being Jesus and she said "i can teach you how to walk on water, oh wait, you are so light you can just fly over!" and it just made me feel angry and immasculated. I really like her but i guess im just not her type, time to move on huh.

 

 

 

 

Ooooooooooooh.....

 

If she was very petite, and she made a joke, I doubt your weight BOTHERED her at all - she just made a joke, and included the fact u are skinny.

 

Sometimes, it is what it is: your skinny, and people will make reference to it. Just learn to love the cards u have been dealt.

 

I have a muscular build which I hate - I like the look of petite women. However, i settle for a fit and ehalthy 125 - 130 lbs at 5 ; 5, with huge boobs and a big bubble butt.

 

 

Just work what u have, and your confidence will rreally draw girls to u! U said your fit, so all u have to do is really shine through with who u are, and quality girls will go for u, regardless of your weight.

 

 

I do recommend going for the more petite girls, and giving this one girl a chance! She was just JOKING>?!

 

She could have beeb playfully joking. Just try to let girls get to know the real you. LIke I said - I guarantee, once a girl is into u, your weight will not matter.

 

 

I see plenty of beautiful girls with skinny dudes. If your a decent guy, that l;ooks decent, but is just naturally small, then u will find great girls:)

 

 

U should have joked back to her, if she is petite, saying " well, u could probv do the jesus thing better than me, seeing as you weigh less silly"

[Saraswati57]

To the OP, I was in roughly the same situation as you. I was too thin and it made a huge dent in my self-esteem. I wouldn't even approach a woman, just because I knew society's perspective on overtly thin people.

 

However, after I lost my job, I basically hibernated, not doing much during the day except working out. I was lucky to have other income. Point being, I gained a substantial amount of weight. I'm sure most people couldn't do that, but maybe you could decrease your activity during the day by an impacting percentage, and increase intake of food as well (with a decent but not excessive workout plan).

[yongyong]

If I like this girl but she is somewhat chubby (I wouldn't even look at her from the beginning if she was fat), I will ask her to lose weight.

(I know a lot of insecure Fat women will get mad but I don't care)

She is not asking you to build like a body builder. maybe she just wants an Average guy.

 

You gained weight and built muscle because she pushed you. who gets the benefit at the end? you or her? what if you transformed your body but she says 'let's be friends'?

you still have nicer body and your confidence is way up. it will be easier for you to date another one. So basically you have to thank her.

Get rid of your INSECURITY ISSUES.

You can just sit and complain like a fat girl 'if you don't love where I am right now, leave me' OR change yourself to be better person.

[FitChick]

Next time this girl makes a joke about your thinness, tell her you would gladly gain weight if she would cook for you.

 

What is your face like? Are you photogenic? If you are tall enough, you might consider working as a model at least part time for extra money.

 

I like thin guys because they look best in clothes. Thin guys show off any muscle gain better as well because there is no fat covering it.

 

If you are young and still growing, there isn't too much you can do at this time.

 

Have at least one avocado a day. Fattening in a good way and loaded with nutrition. Maybe pour honey over it or Greek yogurt, which has lots of protein and is very easy to find these days.

[FitChick]

I just made myself hungry posting the above and remembered I had an avocado and some Greek yogurt in the fridge. Yippee! I added honey and a large spoonful of orange marmalade and and sprinkle of cinnamon. Heaven. You could make it more fattening by adding a glob of condensed milk as a sweetener. Condensed milk also has some protein in it. It is my weakness. Maybe squirt some whipped cream on top, too. Chop up some dark chocolate to sprinkle on top. A body builder's sundae.

 

Oh, gawd, this is torture!

[Airborne]

Oh, gawd, this is torture!

Resist! We both need to be in top shape for when we get around to exchanging pictures.

 

Skinny is great OP. I know many women who enjoy a skinny man.

[spiderowl]

If you aren't dieting and that's the reason why your weight is low, then just dismiss this woman. Most women actually like slim guys! Even skinny is OK, really. Obviously, each person will have their preferences - this applies to males and females - so you aren't going to please everyone. I don't happen to like very muscly guys but lots of women do.

 

It's probably not your weight that is preventing you from getting girls but could well be lack of confidence. Having a relationship break up is pretty hard on the soul and it's not suprising it's taken you a while to recover. You might feel vulnerable to criticism and take things to heart when you shouldn't. If a girl doesn't accept you as you are, slim and all, then she's not right for you. I know it's frustrating if you like her, but 'criticising' a person's natural build is not very mature. A confident guy would probably tell her that's just the way he's built and if she's not comfortable with it, that's fine, she will meet someone else. Being comfortable with yourself and confident is easily conveyed to the other person. Once she knows you aren't insecure about it, she will have no need to be, after all she's with this strong, confident guy isn't she?

 

Seriously though, if she can't see past this, she's not grown up enough for you.

[lady_jadie]

not being funny but i dig skinny guys :s it's not wierd, a lot of my friends feel the same..

 

but it's the confidence, I get that, but just saying...

[CopingGal]

Bottom line- if they can't accept your weight, it's time to go.

 

My ex is extremely skinny and it bothered me for a very long time, but I loved him. One day, his skinny body didn't bother me anymore. I just wanted to be with him. Of course, he was cheating on me and I didn't know it.

 

I never asked him to gain weight when we were together. No one should ever ask you to gain or lose weight. I'm very heavy, but if a man can't accept me...then screw him. You can lose weight or gain weight, but maybe later go back to what you naturally are. You can't live your life afraid you will lose weight again or afraid you will gain weight again.

 

Screw these people who can't accept.

[Emilia]

 

I have been working out 4 days a week for now 6 months and i am definetly getting stronger but im not gaining weight, because i simply can't afford to eat enough per day due to my high rent and low income and im unable to work until i finish school since im not very good at doing stuff all the time (especially not when depressed)

 

Can you move to a cheaper area so you have more disposable income for food?

I have absolutely no motivation anymore, because im lifting about the same as my buddy and i have been increasing my performance way more than him but he is still so big compared to me... I'm just annoyed at

 

You should post on the 'Physical health' board, a lot of guys lift and can give you nutrition and weight advice. It sounds like you are not lifting heavy enough, it doesn't matter how much your friend is lifting!

 

You have to eat well though. I would move somewhere cheaper. Your well being is more important.

[shayla]

My boyfriend is tall and very slim, and I think he is very sexy! He has a confidence and a swagger about him that makes me weak in the knees.