NoneoftheAbove Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 Long story short.. I've caught my gf sexting to her ex. She admits what shes done wrong and wants us to work through this. I dont trust her and i told her this. It will take me awhile to trust her again..and a lot for her to do so i can trust her again. My question is..Should i give her another chance? My heart says yes but id like to get some feed back. Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
nick d Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 Well the main thing is, is will you able to be able to trust her again and let this incident go? If not, it will never work out.. Link to post Share on other sites
wilsonx Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 If shes talking about an ex or texting an ex after a year into your relationship, its over for you. Especially sexting. I read your post in the dating forum and left it alone but here I am going to save you some heartache or unnecessary hurt on yourself. Its time to be a MAN and walk away and remove this from your life. How can you be in a relationship with someone you can't trust. It means you have no trust in yourself to do the right thing. Link to post Share on other sites
OffandOnStillinLove Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 Trust is serious - I would ask her who started it, this does matter... If its him, ask her to delete his number, for less temptation to reply... also, is she still into him? If it's only for attention or some other dumb game then she needs to deal with what is the "lure" of this- but if she's still into him, why cnat she be honest about it? IS she playing both of you, just a thought, this isn;t good and would be the time to leave, I d say, if she is a "game player"... If she truly seems sorry and its the first time, then ask her if she's serious about getting past him and is serious with U, if she is, and its the first time, forgive her.. if it happens again, its time to have a serious thot of forgetting about her. and hopefully acting on that sadly.. Link to post Share on other sites
EgoJoe Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 If shes talking about an ex or texting an ex after a year into your relationship, its over for you. Especially sexting. I read your post in the dating forum and left it alone but here I am going to save you some heartache or unnecessary hurt on yourself. Its time to be a MAN and walk away and remove this from your life. How can you be in a relationship with someone you can't trust. It means you have no trust in yourself to do the right thing. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ AGREED OP: It is time for you to unceremoniously dump her otherwise you will end up getting used. Get all of her things together, bring it over to her house and then just drop the bomb, "I'm done. You know why. I don't hate you. Don't contact me. Goodbye." Link to post Share on other sites
Author NoneoftheAbove Posted March 21, 2012 Author Share Posted March 21, 2012 Trust is serious - I would ask her who started it, this does matter... If its him, ask her to delete his number, for less temptation to reply... also, is she still into him? If it's only for attention or some other dumb game then she needs to deal with what is the "lure" of this- but if she's still into him, why cnat she be honest about it? IS she playing both of you, just a thought, this isn;t good and would be the time to leave, I d say, if she is a "game player"... If she truly seems sorry and its the first time, then ask her if she's serious about getting past him and is serious with U, if she is, and its the first time, forgive her.. if it happens again, its time to have a serious thot of forgetting about her. and hopefully acting on that sadly.. Yes she is truly sorry..I walked out on her other day when she came to talk..she chased me down crying dont go. She wasnt the one who started the sexting. And its a first time. Link to post Share on other sites
Author NoneoftheAbove Posted March 21, 2012 Author Share Posted March 21, 2012 If shes talking about an ex or texting an ex after a year into your relationship, its over for you. Especially sexting. I read your post in the dating forum and left it alone but here I am going to save you some heartache or unnecessary hurt on yourself. Its time to be a MAN and walk away and remove this from your life. How can you be in a relationship with someone you can't trust. It means you have no trust in yourself to do the right thing. We been dating for nearly 3 months. Link to post Share on other sites
OffandOnStillinLove Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 Yes she is truly sorry..I walked out on her other day when she came to talk..she chased me down crying dont go. She wasnt the one who started the sexting. And its a first time. The other posters have had a good point too, tho.. .its hard to say to be "tough" about it, or to forgive, if it's the first time, youve gotta decide ultimately, but wow, can u decide if your gut tells you " she is TRULY SORRY" and this is just a horrible mistake, or is she a good liar? ya know? Dont type it here, but thin about what the text said, if you read it... if it was blatant sexting, like " I wanna ;;;;; you later" than this is rotten, but if it was just a silly flirty thing, like I miss you, ... if it was blatant than she seems like a pure liar, and just crying "alligator tears" like "yea, Ill act like Im sad and the moment you take me back Im grining" - that is sick - ask yourself which it is.... I hope it is sincerely apology and wasnt too "hard core" sexting.... if you know what I mean.... like she has no heart - but what the other posters said might be better - guys know men better, listen to them too Link to post Share on other sites
EgoJoe Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 We been dating for nearly 3 months. You've been dating for three months. Consider this a blessing in disguise. Dump her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author NoneoftheAbove Posted March 21, 2012 Author Share Posted March 21, 2012 The other posters have had a good point too, tho.. .its hard to say to be "tough" about it, or to forgive, if it's the first time, youve gotta decide ultimately, but wow, can u decide if your gut tells you " she is TRULY SORRY" and this is just a horrible mistake, or is she a good liar? ya know? Dont type it here, but thin about what the text said, if you read it... if it was blatant sexting, like " I wanna ;;;;; you later" than this is rotten, but if it was just a silly flirty thing, like I miss you, ... if it was blatant than she seems like a pure liar, and just crying "alligator tears" like "yea, Ill act like Im sad and the moment you take me back Im grining" - that is sick - ask yourself which it is.... I hope it is sincerely apology and wasnt too "hard core" sexting.... if you know what I mean.... like she has no heart - but what the other posters said might be better - guys know men better, listen to them too Only if you seen the way she was crying and shaking...I dont think she was faking if she was...then shes a good liar. But im happy with my decision. Im gonna give it another chance. We all make mistakes, it takes a lot to forgive i know and its not gonna be easy.. and im not just gonna let her back in that easy. Link to post Share on other sites
wilsonx Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 She was crying and shaking because she did not want to be alone emotionally; signs of a rebounder. Another one, texting/sexting the ex. Like I said, you have no trust within yourself so you take the trust of another persons word as truth. Link to post Share on other sites
Author NoneoftheAbove Posted March 21, 2012 Author Share Posted March 21, 2012 She was crying and shaking because she did not want to be alone emotionally; signs of a rebounder. Another one, texting/sexting the ex. Like I said, you have no trust within yourself so you take the trust of another persons word as truth. I see the goodness in this person..like if i didn't i wouldnt have given her that chance. Link to post Share on other sites
OffandOnStillinLove Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 Only if you seen the way she was crying and shaking...I dont think she was faking if she was...then shes a good liar. But im happy with my decision. Im gonna give it another chance. We all make mistakes, it takes a lot to forgive i know and its not gonna be easy.. and im not just gonna let her back in that easy. ok, I get it- but the part you didnt answer is [ and yo udont have to post word for word] but HOW BAD was the sexting, blunt and "I want to F... you" or just a flirt y thing, on a scale of 1 to 10 how RUDE and sexual was it? this is important... if it was BLUNT and animalistic, that is a HUGE WARNING, and she was SHAKING because she was CAUGHT- but if it was a flirty thing, then maybe its worth trying and forgiving..... really, ask yourself, how RUDE was it? did you read it, at least? Link to post Share on other sites
Author NoneoftheAbove Posted March 21, 2012 Author Share Posted March 21, 2012 ok, I get it- but the part you didnt answer is [ and yo udont have to post word for word] but HOW BAD was the sexting, blunt and "I want to F... you" or just a flirt y thing, on a scale of 1 to 10 how RUDE and sexual was it? this is important... if it was BLUNT and animalistic, that is a HUGE WARNING, and she was SHAKING because she was CAUGHT- but if it was a flirty thing, then maybe its worth trying and forgiving..... really, ask yourself, how RUDE was it? did you read it, at least? yes i red few of them but not everything. He was like "lay on the floor so i can cum on you" "suck my d*ck" her reply.. i cant suck ....my back hurts Link to post Share on other sites
Author NoneoftheAbove Posted March 21, 2012 Author Share Posted March 21, 2012 yes i red few of them but not everything. He was like "lay on the floor so i can cum on you" "suck my d*ck" her reply.. i cant suck ....my back hurts When i said let me read the text msgs again other night.. she said she deleted it because she didnt want to be reminded by her mistake. Link to post Share on other sites
wilsonx Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 When i said let me read the text msgs again other night.. she said she deleted it because she didnt want to be reminded by her mistake. Have fun being a rebound. You're in for the worst year of your life. Good Luck Link to post Share on other sites
JasonRules Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 If she's sexting her ex on the 3rd month of your relationship, she'll be sucking the exes sausage by the 6th month and spreading high and wide by month no. 9. My advice? Hit the eject button while you're still ahead and haven't spent a ton of money. Trust me when I tell you this. Some women are insecure and feeble by their very nature and constantly need the advances and flirtations of other men to feel good about themselves. If you don't bail now, you'll be on here crying a year from now like a wounded puppy. Be a man and show that you don't tolerate flirts. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
JasonRules Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 Have fun being a rebound. You're in for the worst year of your life. Good Luck Listen to what we're telling you. You're setting yourself up to lose. Hit the EJECT button while you're still ahead and consider yourself lucky she did this now. Link to post Share on other sites
Author NoneoftheAbove Posted March 21, 2012 Author Share Posted March 21, 2012 Listen to what we're telling you. You're setting yourself up to lose. Hit the EJECT button while you're still ahead and consider yourself lucky she did this now. You folks only heard the bad stuff and think this person is an evil. But understand when i say i see the good in them. Maybe im blinded by love. But why yould you fight so hard for something that you will lose again? i just cant put it together... Link to post Share on other sites
Author NoneoftheAbove Posted March 21, 2012 Author Share Posted March 21, 2012 If she's sexting her ex on the 3rd month of your relationship, she'll be sucking the exes sausage by the 6th month and spreading high and wide by month no. 9. My advice? Hit the eject button while you're still ahead and haven't spent a ton of money. Trust me when I tell you this. Some women are insecure and feeble by their very nature and constantly need the advances and flirtations of other men to feel good about themselves. If you don't bail now, you'll be on here crying a year from now like a wounded puppy. Be a man and show that you don't tolerate flirts. She wasnt the one who started sexting.. He did Link to post Share on other sites
Author NoneoftheAbove Posted March 21, 2012 Author Share Posted March 21, 2012 This is what shes been saying for the past 3 days.. take my word when i say i will not tolerate . Sarah says: i just want to earn your trust back one way or another and i am not going to screw that up i have the best boyfriend in the world why would i want to lose that? i already know the pain of almost losing you it just makes me want to hold on to you tighter you have my word i take your word very seriously i don't want to lose you all i can do is whatever you ask i am at your mercy i promise you will never see any flirting if somebody tries i will say I HAVE A BOYFRIEND and there will be no further discussion Link to post Share on other sites
OffandOnStillinLove Posted March 21, 2012 Share Posted March 21, 2012 When i said let me read the text msgs again other night.. she said she deleted it because she didnt want to be reminded by her mistake. ok, sounds ilke HE is totally the aggessor [aka pursuing it] and her responses were sort of "go away" not jumping into the convo deeper, so yes, first time, Id forgive, but do what you think is best.... and if other "red flags" come up, LISTEN TO THEM and add it all up , and then leave. Link to post Share on other sites
Author NoneoftheAbove Posted March 21, 2012 Author Share Posted March 21, 2012 ok, sounds ilke HE is totally the aggessor [aka pursuing it] and her responses were sort of "go away" not jumping into the convo deeper, so yes, first time, Id forgive, but do what you think is best.... and if other "red flags" come up, LISTEN TO THEM and add it all up , and then leave. Im gonna go ahead and listen to my heart.. What i see right now, her trying her best to keep this going. I've never seen anyone chase me like this so in the end they can lose it all again. I forgive but i don't forget, im more cautious now. And i have set my ground rules and made myself very clear. I will not tolerate any of her actions next time. Link to post Share on other sites
robertmathis1026 Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 Everyone deserves for a second chance, but don't give your ex the "third" or the "fourth" Are you SUFFERING THE PAIN, because your ex DUMP you? Can You imagine, if you can make your ex BEGGING TO BACK WITH YOU? click here to make it HAPPEN!! Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts