What are your earning potential requirements?

[brokenTom]

People, also remember it depends where one lives. 50k in the country is not the same as 50k in the city.

 

I personally have no requirements other then being with someone with some sort of goal or activity that makes them happy. If kids are involved it would be nice if either us could be the stay-at-home, at least while they are young.

[setsenia]

Well, in my area, in order to even own your own place, let alone have kids, you need a six figure income. So I can relate to the 120k a year and even then I know people making that living in tiny condos. My husband and I will most likely be moving out of the area soon, while we're not tied down to careers or have kids to support. Even then, each of us likes to think big and make 60-80k a year each minimum once we get our college degrees. We want to own a home, if possible before we have a family and would like to travel. IMO, I think both parents should work or at least have working experience and/or education. If one person works, even if they make a lot of money, what would you do if that primary source of income was lost? With the economy the way it is, I feel both people should be able to work, if necessary.

[verhrzn]

Geez, six figures seem to be the norm for expectations?? I really AM lower middle class....

 

Honestly, I've never really wanted to date a guy who is much wealthier than I am. There are just so many imbalances and differences in attitudes. I can't even conceive of what it would be like to have a 100k salary. It just boggles my mind.

 

But I suppose if you came from a wealthier family, this would be the norm, and it'd be as difficult for you to date down as it is for me to date up. Still... it's always a little bizarre comparing my "norm" to others' "norm."

[veggirl]

Damn. I can't wrap my mind around requiring a man to make 6 figures.

 

I feel bad for spookie she does a boring job she doesn't like and dates men she has no respect for all because of money. Although people like her make it easy on people like me, its just a game I'd wrather not be playing. Wish more people would wake up to my reality.

 

This is so spot on!

 

I don't have an exact salary requirement in a partner. I certainly don't expect 120k, I live in a large city too. I make 42k. I assume my BF makes more than me, but not a whole lot more. Maybe 50-55? I guess I'd want my man to make at least around the same as me, I suppose mid 30s (ex: starting teacher salary) would be the min... I don't know, I don't think about this. I expect a guy to be able to support himself. I don't expect him to be able to support me. I don't want kids and don't date guys who do, so that's a non-issue. A DINK combined salary of 80k sounds fine to me.

 

OP, aren't you like 25? Where do you meet these guys your age making over 100k?

Edited March 21, 2012 by veggirl

[phineas]

Geez, six figures seem to be the norm for expectations?? I really AM lower middle class....

 

Honestly, I've never really wanted to date a guy who is much wealthier than I am. There are just so many imbalances and differences in attitudes. I can't even conceive of what it would be like to have a 100k salary. It just boggles my mind.

 

But I suppose if you came from a wealthier family, this would be the norm, and it'd be as difficult for you to date down as it is for me to date up. Still... it's always a little bizarre comparing my "norm" to others' "norm."

 

It really does depend on where you are located.

Where I live the median income for single males is roughly 30k.

 

women on match.com list 50k to 75k as their starting salaries in the "their date" section.

 

I gotta say, their dreaming. Because every baller I know in my area my in their late 30's / early 40's is dating women in their early 30's & not the 40yr olds.

[phineas]

Damn. I can't wrap my mind around requiring a man to make 6 figures.

 

 

 

This is so spot on!

 

I don't have an exact salary requirement in a partner. I certainly don't expect 120k, I live in a large city too. I make 42k. I assume my BF makes more than me, but not a whole lot more. Maybe 50-55? I guess I'd want my man to make at least around the same as me, I suppose mid 30s (ex: starting teacher salary) would be the min... I don't know, I don't think about this. I expect a guy to be able to support himself. I don't expect him to be able to support me. I don't want kids and don't date guys who do, so that's a non-issue. A DINK combined salary of 80k sounds fine to me.

 

OP, aren't you like 25? Where do you meet these guys your age making over 100k?

 

Unless their a teacher with tenure, most women I meet in my area make about 12$ /hr if that (typical cubical job) unless their manager.

 

I don't know if it's the pro hockey & football players throwing money around at bars that get 'em crazy but I just don't make the pay grade for women that can barely keep food in their fridge.

Oh well.

[veggirl]

Unless their a teacher with tenure, most women I meet in my area make about 12$ /hr if that (typical cubical job) unless their manager.

 

I don't know if it's the pro hockey & football players throwing money around at bars that get 'em crazy but I just don't make the pay grade for women that can barely keep food in their fridge.

Oh well.

 

Oh, my BFF has a bachelors and works in a childrens hosp making $13/ hr. I'm honestly flabbergasted at the idea of requiring ONE PERSON to make 120k. Hilarious.

[udolipixie]

$200,000 it's what I make.

 

I ask for what I give outside of genitals.

[udolipixie]

To women its all about the money. So cliche.

 

Personally I dont see why a man should give a woman his loyalty and stay with her until she is old and ugly when she wouldn't even have stayed with him in the first place if he didn't make a certain amount of money.

 

If a woman can base her interest on a man's level of wealth and refuse to be with him unless he meets that requirement, then in turn a man can also base his interest on a woman's level of youth and beauty and refuse to be with her when she no longer meets that requirement. Its fairness.

Your situation isn't fair as one is she's doesn't consider him for shallow reasons and the other is that he leaves her for shallow reasons.

 

Fairness would be:

If a woman can base her interest on a man's level of wealth and refuse to be with him unless he meets that requirement, then in turn a man can base his interest on a woman's level of youth/beauty and refuse to be with her unless she meets that requirement.

 

If a woman can base her interest on a man's level of wealth and refuse to be with him when he no longer meets that requirement, then in turn a man can also base his interest on a woman's level of youth and beauty and refuse to be with her when she no longer meets that requirement.

[ThaWholigan]

I make £0 (£110 every 2 weeks to be exact ). So I require £0 in return. Money isn't a motivator when it comes to me & girls.

Edited March 21, 2012 by ThaWholigan

[spookie]

Damn. I can't wrap my mind around requiring a man to make 6 figures.

 

 

 

This is so spot on!

 

I don't have an exact salary requirement in a partner. I certainly don't expect 120k, I live in a large city too. I make 42k. I assume my BF makes more than me, but not a whole lot more. Maybe 50-55? I guess I'd want my man to make at least around the same as me, I suppose mid 30s (ex: starting teacher salary) would be the min... I don't know, I don't think about this. I expect a guy to be able to support himself. I don't expect him to be able to support me. I don't want kids and don't date guys who do, so that's a non-issue. A DINK combined salary of 80k sounds fine to me.

 

OP, aren't you like 25? Where do you meet these guys your age making over 100k?

 

My expectations would be different if I didn't want kids. If that were the case, I wouldn't care about earning potential at all. But in my area, I think it would be damn hard not to struggle living in a ghetto neighborhood, with a couple of kids and a combined income under 6 figures. My parents make about that much and based on my childhood and their current predicament of not being able to retire, I know it's not that much. I make about 80k now and while it's more than enough for me to comfortably support myself, if I had a kid, I know I'd be stressed financially.

 

I would like to be able to stay at home at least until the kids are in school, be able to put them through college, and still retire before I hit the bucket. My earning potential requirements are something I expect to acheive myself within the next couple years, so I don't see why it is an unreasonable expectation.

[xxoo]

I'm honestly flabbergasted at the idea of requiring ONE PERSON to make 120k. Hilarious.

 

It does depend on the area.

 

Still, even in those high COL areas, plenty of people live and raise families on much less. A lot of the time, people overestimate needs, and "modest" lifestyle.

 

For example, we live very comfortably on an income that is about 65% of the average household income in our area. You could look at the figures and believe that a couple would need a higher income to raise a family here--but it simply isn't true. The average family has a McMansion and 2 SUVs. We don't.

[verhrzn]

I would like to be able to stay at home at least until the kids are in school, be able to put them through college, and still retire before I hit the bucket. My earning potential requirements are something I expect to acheive myself within the next couple years, so I don't see why it is an unreasonable expectation.

 

Hope this doesn't come across as offensive, but what's with the focus on putting kids through college?

 

Granted, mine never had the choice (nurse and a cop... not exactly overly paid professions), but I don't understand what is SO awful about a kid, ya know, paying his own way. My loans are kinda tough, but they don't break my back. And getting a part time job in college is what lead to my current job. Even my sister, who is going to a big public school, and whose tuition costed about 3 times what mine did, is paying for her own way.

 

I can understand wanting to give your kid the occasional support, but what's the thought process behind insisting that you must be able to put them through school?

[Star Gazer]

For the women who make enough to support a family (modestly), doesn't that give you more flexibility in choosing a mate? He can come to the table with other skills and strengths, and a smaller salary, because you've got the high salary part covered.

 

I have no desire to pawn off my children on a nanny.

[Star Gazer]

I'm honestly flabbergasted at the idea of requiring ONE PERSON to make 120k. Hilarious.

 

Hilarious? It's around what most professionals my age in my area earn.

[Untouchable_Fire]

I didn't think there were enough inflammatory threads on this forum today.

We can pretend that money shouldnt matter, but when it comes down to planning a future, especially for those who want children, its foolish not to consider your prospective mates finances. A woman would be a fool to sign up to be both a caregiver, and breadwinner.

Please discuss.

My personal requirement is that the guy be able to modestly support a wife and a couple of kids... Something I should be able to do in a few years, in my career; therefore making it, in my mind, a reasonable expectation. IMO that translates to a salary of about 120k per year in my area, the key word being, modestly.

 

I fit your qualifications. I think you are going to have a really tough fight finding a guy like me though for a couple of reason's.

 

First low supply and high demand, which means competition can be fierce... especially if the guy has lots of other qualities. Additionally, guys with money tend to shy away from high earning women for a number of reasons.

[xxoo]

I have no desire to pawn off my children on a nanny.

 

Who said nanny?

 

If his income is not necessary to get by, he could be a stay at home parent for a few years.

[Highness]

I make 6 figures and used to think Id be with a man who earnt around the same. As it stands, I fell in love with a wonderful man who earns about 1/4 of my salary - but he is a hard worker and the most amazing boyfriend in the world.

 

Money means nothing if you're not happy.

[Sanman]

Well, I am looking at net worth more than earning potential. I think 750k net worth minimum is necessary. A bit more would be necessary said woman has several children. I would also be nice if there was a pension in addition to social security income. Children won't be an issue as I will be looking largely in the post-menopausal blue hair crowd. However, I would like to take a few years off to raise a puppy and get in touch with my nurturing tendencies.

 

On a more serious note, many finance professionals in NYC will make 6 figures after 1-2 years. Lawyers do as well if they work for a good firm. Everyone else, not so much. One of the big reasons I am strongly considering moving in a year or two.

[iris219]

Wow. So if you met an awesome guy who was a teacher or social worker, you seriously wouldn't date him? That is baffling to me.

 

Why do you need someone to make 6 figures? What would you spend this money on? I have a 3 bedroom home with a huge yard in a desirable area and a new car, and my total bills (for everything) are under $2000 a month. I put a lot in savings in each month.

 

I do well financially for my area, and I expect to date someone who makes less than me, and that's fine. As long as someone isn't living above their means and/or in debt, I'm happy.

[make me believe]

I can't imagine turning a guy down because he doesn't make 6 figures. My hubby makes more than I do now (well, obviously, since I don't work. lol) but when I graduate and start working fulltime, I'll most likely make more than he does. Might it be nice to be a housewife forever and be able to depend on a man's 6 figure salary? Sure.... but would it be worth losing out on my amazing husband?? No way!!!!

 

I guess I can see how it might be different if you want kids... But I still think I'd be settling for far less than I have now if I'd passed over my husband in favor of someone who makes more money. My hubby is fullfilled by his career choice, and that's one of the things I love about him.

 

I don't know, I think these women who have super high salary requirements (not matter what part of the country you live in) are really limiting themselves. What do you do if you meet an amazing guy and then find out he's a high school teacher? Immediately cut contact with him? Or do you screen every guy right away to make sure he's in a job that potentially meets your earning requirements??

[Kamille]

While I was a student I was broke and I still managed to get by, so I didn't care. Dated loads of musicians. They're broke but they've got rhythm .

 

Now that I've entered the job market and make enough money to support a family on my own, I still don't care.

 

The only thing I want is to be with someone who is also passionate about what they do - whether that be their day job or their hobby. They also need to know how to make it happen. Basement musicians please abstain. I'm passionate about what I do and I find it can be a challenge for guys who date me. I need to be with someone who can become as obsessed with their passions as I am. They need to be supportive (and not jealous) of my career.

[fortyninethousand322]

I'd say 3 dollars an hour sounds about right. That's a solid earning potential.

[Mme. Chaucer]

When I was young and thinking about the idea of marriage, "earning potential" never even appeared on my mental radar. I didn't even think about how we would get stuff, or pay for kids, or any of that. I suppose it would have been more mature and forward thinking to consider such things, but I did not at all.

 

With my degree in English Literature and dance career, my earning potential wasn't looking very promising either.

 

I figured out how to make money as I went along. My (former) husband ended up joining me in the sales business I started, and miraculously we turned out to have good earning potential.

 

But NEVER, ever even thought of it before. We were artists! We were free!

 

Now … I remarried, no more kids are forthcoming, but once again, did not care about earning potential.

 

I did care that this was a man who was responsible with $ and was taking care of himself that way. That's it.

[Art_Critic]

When you are younger, you look at someone's earning potential. When you are older, you look at their earning history.

 

and when you are older you look at the money earned sitting in a nice brokerage account raking in 15-18% working toward your retirement..oh.. you are also looking at the quite large 401-k too..

 

When you are younger you can't have a large 401-k and most youngin's don't have a big brokerage account either...