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addicted with insecurities


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I hate the fact that I am aware of my certain insecurity with this woman, who happened to be my boyfriend's ex live-in partner. Me and my boyfriend are not live-in because we're still young, I'm 18 and he's 20. I don't know why I am acting stupidly :( I don't how to handle the fact that I am obsessed to everything that will happened or happening to her. I always stalk her facebook and twitter accounts, look and read every updates, posts, comments and photos of her and try to compare her with myself. Insanely stupid right? I just can't handle this reality. I tried to avoid stalking her page, BUT I just became frustrated not knowing what was happening to her. Well, the truth is I don't want her to be happy, because I hate her. And I don't know why, I just felt that sudden roughness when it comes to her. :(A LOT and LOT of people are trying to make me realize that I am MORE than what she is. But I can't see that. I know that every person has their own edge, weakness and so on. But when I try to compare myself with her, I just find myself disappointed, and asking so many whys.

 

I am totally acting so off beam right? I won't deny that. That is why I wrote this post. For you guys to help me recover :( I would totally appreciate every advises, any sort of it. I just want myself to move on and to be better. I just don't know how to start and where to start my so called rehabilitation :(

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uhm i guess yes? I think, I am one of the reason why they really broke up. Because according to my boyfriend, this girl broke up with him first, and he did everything to take her back. BUT she just ignored him. That's why my boyfriend chose to move on and courted me. BUT during the courting stage this girl tried to get him back to her. BUT he chose me, instead of her. Is it my fault? I really don't know why I am acting and feeling this way. It is weird and annoying. I don't know what's the reason and the problem, that's why I don't know how to fix my self. :(

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Wow :D i really didn't know what to say. But thanks a lot :) thanks for your encouragements and advises, I know that this would help me to feel better. I hope that everything will turn out fine. And that my hatred, jealousy and insecurity will be gone in time.

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Feelin Frisky

You're young, but at some point you have to confront yourself and realize that vindictiveness, obsession and hatred are not things you accept of yourself. You seem to be starting on that path by asking for help here. You know these things make you the one who can ruin it for you. So pull yourself up and reinforce to yourself that you do not accept this of yourself and get yourself busy elsewhere like exercising or some other interest to otherwise occupy your mind. Good luck.

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Thank you :) It means a lot to me that, you shared your time to give those advises because it will really help me, a lot :) I know and I'm hoping that I'll be okay SOON ;)

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