Trying so hard not to break NC...

[BMZMJ]

Dear companions LOL,

 

quick background on the story. Today is day 13 of NC. her last text was this: (no reply from me)

 

"'Just reminding you that my personal space is important to me right now. dont contact me because that will just confuse me more. If our lives are meant to be...then I will wait for my sign...God will be my guidance..and I believe he wants me to be happy no matter my decission...Respond yes if you understand...Whatever I decide, it will be for the best, I just know it...Thank you for your patience and understanding...I dont know how long it will take but time should not matter if love is life long..Take care XXXX..."

 

In addition, she met with my mom this past week and told her she is missing me a lot, feels a 'knot' in her stomach, that she adores me, but that the wounds are still fresh, and that she was upset I wouldnt bring her on a trip, etc..

 

Nevertheless, it doesnt seem to be enough for her to want to contact me...

 

She asked for 'time' and I have given it, so it is very hard for me to accept this is really over. I have accepted that we are not together now but I can't get rid of this hope that she will contact me one of these days...

 

13 days without contact is the longest in our 5 year relationship, and I'm really trying hard not to break NC.

[leninjapirate]

Don't give in hun, you're doing brilliantly. This is cruel of her to make the break-up so open-ended, well I don't know the particulars of it but it seems cruel. Was it a break-up or a break? I don't really agree with breaks. But maybe you should set yourself a goal, like 30 days NC, and every day you get closer to that you could do something nice for yourself, with some big milestones every so often. Like wayhey, congratulations, you've reached Day 14! Now how will you be celebrating? =)

 

If she's said that she wants time to decide if she's coming or going, then you need to set a deadline for her, you are not some doormat who will wait for her eternally. 30-35 days is the longest I would give it. You shouldn't tell her what the deadline is, it should just be for you, but tell others if you need to hold yourself accountable. Make sure that you respect yourself and stick to it.

 

Good luck hun, all the best.

[BewitchedandBothered]

Don't give in hun, you're doing brilliantly. This is cruel of her to make the break-up so open-ended, well I don't know the particulars of it but it seems cruel. Was it a break-up or a break? I don't really agree with breaks. But maybe you should set yourself a goal, like 30 days NC, and every day you get closer to that you could do something nice for yourself, with some big milestones every so often. Like wayhey, congratulations, you've reached Day 14! Now how will you be celebrating? =)

 

If she's said that she wants time to decide if she's coming or going, then you need to set a deadline for her, you are not some doormat who will wait for her eternally. 30-35 days is the longest I would give it. You shouldn't tell her what the deadline is, it should just be for you, but tell others if you need to hold yourself accountable. Make sure that you respect yourself and stick to it.

 

Good luck hun, all the best.

 

30 days? But what if God doesn't get the message to her in time?? Sorry, was feeling snarky. This reminds me of a story my Dad used to tell us about the time he was dumped by a gal who told him she was giving him up for Lent. BMZ, She is sniffing around some other guy and waiting to see how it plays out. Think logically...Do you really think she's sitting home alone on a Friday night talking it over with God about you?

 

This is the one who is using your Mom as a vehicle to transport information such as "I have knots in my stomach and missing him". It's a stupid game. Trying to keep you in limbo while she does whatever. Time for you to realize that there is no reason to contact this person. You have to go about your life and don't wait for her.