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How do you guys feel about your ex?


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Me and my ex had a really bad break up. Its been 6 months now with the first 3 months of drama and back and forth stuff, but the last 3 months when I think about it. I get bitter sometimes and sometimes I feel indifferent towards her, a part of me wants to send her a random message saying I hate you or do you realize how ****ed up person you were to me? But I won't cause I have been ignoring her for the past 3 months now. Cause I know it won't ever be the same again. How do you guys feel about your ex.

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SilverBlueAndGold

I feel mostly pity mixed in with a bit of anger.

 

Pity because she has such a low self esteem that she uses her body to get attention. The anger is related to that in a way because that same insecurity caused a lot of problems and had me defending myself for things I never did.

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I feel like I'm starting to get to the point of indifference towards her. I don't wish any ill will on her. In fact I hope she's happy, and from what I've heard she is. I just wish to never hear, talk to, or think about her again.

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a part of me wants to talk to her and be civil. see where she is at an if she realize how terrible she handled the break up. should i?

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Million.to.1

Sometimes I feel angry... sometimes sad, sometimes nostalgic, sometimes relieved, sometimes happy about the new things that I'm now open to. It's always in a state of flux. Indifference and acceptance is what I aim for. It's coming... But only time will get me there.

 

I guess i know that my ex never meant to hurt me. So giving myself time to deal with these constantly changing emotions is something better done alone and away from him. It always seems to drag out and complicate things when there is still contact.

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i feel sad, rejected, sometimes very angry for being abandoned. and, i feel like my feelings fluctuate between these feelings alot. i dont wish him ill will, but, part of me wants to duct tape him to a chair and torture answers out of him, lol. no, i dont want to hurt him, but i guess i feel alot of frustration that he just walked out without trying to find another option.

 

xztjohn, if you have been doing no contact, and you dont want to get back with her, dont contact her. it will just bring all the pain back. by the time you can handle the pain, you wont have the desire to talk to her. i advise against it. but, we are all human. if you do, you can climb back in the saddle. just know it might feel good at first, but it will hurt later.

 

if you are at indifference, might be okay, but if you are indifferent, you probably wouldn't desire to contact her. good luck. *hugs*

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Million.to.1
a part of me wants to talk to her and be civil. see where she is at an if she realize how terrible she handled the break up. should i?

 

No. When you have no agenda, and no need for her to be sorry for anything, that is when you can actually be civil.

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i still love him yet I hate him. I want to talk to him yet I want nothing to do with him. I wish him the best yet I hope he is unhappy with his new relationship.

 

I hope one day I can talk with him and catch up. it is so hard seeing him on campus with his new toy. We have been 7weeks NC now break up with 4months ago =(

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yeah i know how u feel i see my ex on campus and it doesnt hurt me as bad. plus she is kinda fat and looking uglier now so score for me. plus her bf she left me for is ugly with acne so doule score. it was a rebound that lasted

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i just wanna be able to talk in a civil manner to her one day

 

i feel the same way. but in my case I still want more. and i know that if i open up this door it will just give me more false hopes and I will be even more down and disappointed

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I wish that I'd have asked her to work to help support us instead of saying she could do as she wished and I would pay the bills, because that cost me somewhere around $450,000 at divorce time.

 

Other than that oddity (a 20 year paid vacation means you are entitled to 10 more? Really?) everything is OK and I don't blame her for going for the best outcome she could for herself.

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how do you guys know if u are over tha person?

 

I personally believe you are never really really over them if you had real feelings but here is a guide I use:

 

1.If you see them you fell anxiety?

2.You care about their personal/sex life?

3.You compare everyone you date with them?

4.You believe is the best you ever had in a partner?

5.Would you get back with them if you could?

6.You think of them a lot?

 

 

To be rational , lets say you need 2 of these to count.

 

My own personal opinion.......

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Philosoraptor

I think she is a decent person with a lot of abandonment issues from her childhood. I did everything I could after things ended to give her as easy of a chance as possible to start over, she was less than willing but one day will hopefully appreciate that she was given an opportunity that few get.

 

I still wish her the best and hope she finds what she wants in herself and in this world.

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After 5 months of being single and 4 months of NC, I guess I have been feeling mostly pity and anger for her. Aside from being pretty mean after our breakup, she took no time to grow and immediately rebounded. I've been feeling like I'm missing her family because they were a big part of my life too, and for that I'm angry. I look forward to the day it doesn't hurt to think about losing all of that.

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How do I feel about my ex... hrrrmmmmm...

 

It's a mixed bag of nuts. I don't hate him but I don't like the person he has become. I still love him but I'm in love with the person he was. I'm not angry at him but I am angry at his cowardliness and inability to be a mature adult.

 

I'm actually thankful to him and oddly enough, love him more because of what he did for ME when he left. He motivated me to go to counseling and face the fears I didn't want to face, made me independent because I had no one to be dependent on anymore and brought me closer to my family.

 

It's funny how it works out, he left thinking his life was going to get better when in reality, it actually sounds more pathetic (filled with partying, booze and making horrible professional decisions) and mine has only gotten better.

 

One word - KARMA!

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I miss what we had and want it back but not after breaking up

 

I really miss talking to him about day and stuff, I want to be friends but not anytime soon

 

also pissed that I told him he can text me if he wants to, no word for 9 days... for the best though

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