hamster123 Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 I found out yesterday that my ex girlfriend is now seeing somebody new. Now you're all probably thinking that this is a standard 'I'm not over her, I still want to be with her' thread, however this is not the case. Here's a bit of the back story... We got on great together, but things ended as she couldnt commit to a serious relationship due to emotional baggage from a previous failed relationship. She even told me herself that she really liked me but doesnt want anything serious as she's scared of getting hurt again and doesnt want to go through with the pain again. After this things between us fizzled out. Then 3 months later she started casually sleeping with a friend of mine which really upset me. Months passed until one day she randomly contacted me and pretty much asked me back, saying she wouldnt blame me if I told her to p**s off (she knew that I knew she'd been sleeping with him) but she thinks she's ready for a relationship now. I explained to her that I really did like her back then, but there was no way I could take her back knowing she had been sleeping with my friend. It was a very amicable conversation and she agreed with my decision saying she wouldnt take herself back if she was in my situation. So yeah, yesterday I found out she is seeing somebody new. Now I 100% dont want to be with her after what she did, and I still stand by my decision to not take her back. However If I said that when I heard this news it didnt bother me slightly I would be lying. I definatley felt something when I found out, although i'm not quite sure what it was. It's not jealousy (as I know what a headcase she can be lol), not sadness either...I just don't know what I feel. Is it human nature to feel like this? Always having some sort of feeling for someone you were close to, even though you dont want to be with them? Maybe I'm just thinking that I could have been that guy if only she wasnt so scared to commit when we were seeing each other, just thinking about what could have been. I'm just basically seeking advice on whether its normal to feel something when news like this hits you. Anybody else feel like this at some point? Thanks for reading! Link to post Share on other sites
january2011 Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 I think it's common to feel this way. As long as an ex remains single, the possibility of getting back together and reigniting those hopes and dreams you had for the relationship are much more within reach than if that ex found someone else. It's also a hit to the ego when we are replaced. But you know, you still move on regardless. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
flitzanu Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 yup, very normal to feel anything at all about an ex, especially if you feel they've wronged you in some way. it stings, but you're right, sometimes it isn't clear whether it's jealousy, contempt, anger, or whatever emotion it could be. you just have to try to come to terms and shake it off. Link to post Share on other sites
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