Why do older guys go for the much younger girl?

[PinkInTheLimo]

It sounds like he is still hurt and just went through a nasty divorce and is going a little wild. Why not let him have that as long as he isn't hurting anybody? I have seen freshly divorced women acting the same way. Who doesn't like a little ego boost after getting your heart ripped out. I did the same thing after my divorce but I eventually found a good woman.

 

He IS hurting the women he gets involved with.

Why can people not deal with a break-up in a mature way? Why is it necessary to "go a little wild"? I have been extremely hurt after my last relationship ended but not a hair on my head has thought about playing with someone else's feelings.

If you are a mature person you know when you are not ready for a relationship.

[Woggle]

He IS hurting the women he gets involved with.

Why can people not deal with a break-up in a mature way? Why is it necessary to "go a little wild"? I have been extremely hurt after my last relationship ended but not a hair on my head has thought about playing with someone else's feelings.

If you are a mature person you know when you are not ready for a relationship.

 

Maybe these women know the score. After my divorce I told any woman I was involved with that all I planned on was some quick fun. Some women only want to play around as well. As long as everybody is honest what is the problem.

[PinkInTheLimo]

Your post shows a complete lack of understanding of human nature and of how men work and how they are different from women.

 

The most attractive women to any mature adult attractive man is a woman who has tryed to understand how men work, realize and accept that men are different from women and that it is not something they choose, and who has actually tried to put herself in mens shoes and see things from their point of view.

 

Women like this are rare and hard to find. I have found one like this and that's one of the main reasons I'm marrying her and will stay with her into old age.

 

I refuse to apply other standards to men than I apply to women. I judge men by their qualities as a human beings. The fact that fact that someone is a man will never justify bad behaviour.

Men who only want a younger woman and treat women their age with contempt are not mature adult men. They just have a fetish and are unable to love a woman.

[PinkInTheLimo]

Very Simple Concept... You want to keep a man, its easy, dont be a douche, dont DISRESPECT him, and take care of yourself.

 

You disrespect a guy, you're toast. May not be immediately but down the road it will end for you

 

A guy will get respect from a woman if she thinks he deserves that respect. And women think a man deserves respect if he treats them with respect.

Guys who are guided by their hormones or their his d!ck, will not get any respect from us.

[phineas]

A guy will get respect from a woman if she thinks he deserves that respect. And women think a man deserves respect if he treats them with respect.

Guys who are guided by their hormones or their his d!ck, will not get any respect from us.

 

You keep telling yourself that.

 

As a man I can pick out a woman with a chip on her shoulder from a mile away & I just don't care to deal with them.

 

Age has nothing to do with it either other than the fact that disrespectful women that are older haven't realized their just not as hot as they used to be & men their own age will no longer put up with their poor behavior.

 

You come accross as very bitter like some of the other women here.

You ONLY blame men for dating younger women.

 

Not once have I seen a woman here blame another woman for dating older men.

 

It's the only the man's fault. LOL!

[Disenchantedly Yours]

Women dont want respect, they want security

 

Men want respect

 

This is a very simple concept to grasp.

 

Give us respect, we give you security, and vice versa

 

Ummm... I wan respect.

[Anela]

 

Not once have I seen a woman here blame another woman for dating older men.

 

It's the only the man's fault. LOL!

 

My sister, involved with a much older man, has dealt with disapproving looks from older women when she's been out with him. She also overheard teenage girls, saying something like, "She's just a baby!" in relation to her being with him (she was in her twenties, but looked like a teenager, at the time).

 

I've only seen women here have a problem with men exclusively going for youth, rather than just happening to hit it off and develop a relationship with a younger woman.

[Anela]

Age has nothing to do with it either other than the fact that disrespectful women that are older haven't realized their just not as hot as they used to be & men their own age will no longer put up with their poor behavior.

 

That goes both ways...

[namenottaken]

Age has nothing to do with it either other than the fact that disrespectful women that are older haven't realized their just not as hot as they used to be & men their own age will no longer put up with their poor behavior.

So you’re saying that men will put up with being disrespected as long as the woman is young and hot?

 

Respect is a two way street. If you find you’re not being respected than perhaps you should look at yourself to see what part you’re playing in that. Some people, men and women, are disrespectful to everyone they encounter, but the majority of people (I have run across) give respect until it’s shown not to be deserved.

The most attractive women to any mature adult attractive man is a woman who has tryed to understand how men work, realize and accept that men are different from women and that it is not something they choose, and who has actually tried to put herself in mens shoes and see things from their point of view.

*cough*…*B*…*cough*…*S*…So you find Dr.Ruth attractive, huh?

 

If (at first) you find the woman physically attractive, then this is a quality worth looking for, but by itself will not make a woman attractive to a man.

There are a lot of men and women whose thoughts, ideas and intellect I admire, but that doesn’t make them attractive to me.

I have always just "seen myself" as a guy,period. I've never been hung up on age at all, although there are realities to be faced if someone is dating with an intent to marry and start a family.

I agree that age should factor in when looking to start a family.

 

With the huge increase of children who have Autism and Bipolar, being linked to fathers who are older, women would do well to choose a younger man as well.

 

Also, I can’t imagine my child’s father hitting retirement age when he/she is ready to go off to college. Makes me wonder how many fathers,who waited to have children, will actually see them graduate, get married or ever know their grandchildren.

 

Women need to start looking at the age of the fathers they are picking for their children as well. The younger both parents are the better their chance of having a healthy child and an uneventful pregnancy.

 

I don’t ‘blame’ men for wanting to date a younger woman. Like I said before youth is attractive for both genders. I just see it as kind of pathetic.The reality is most men cannot be ‘sugar daddies’, but will spend their hard earned money like they can afford it, on a young woman in the hopes she will give him a chance. When all she cares about is his money; not him. I’m not saying that in some cases this can’t work out, but just that it is rare.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

You keep telling yourself that.

 

As a man I can pick out a woman with a chip on her shoulder from a mile away & I just don't care to deal with them.

 

Age has nothing to do with it either other than the fact that disrespectful women that are older haven't realized their just not as hot as they used to be & men their own age will no longer put up with their poor behavior.

 

You come accross as very bitter like some of the other women here.

You ONLY blame men for dating younger women.

 

Not once have I seen a woman here blame another woman for dating older men.

 

It's the only the man's fault. LOL!

 

Phineas you come off as bitter with a chip on your shoulder. And it's not just because you have preferences regarding age or looks. It's the langugage you use to describe women that don't fit into your ideals. You make comments about "women stuffing their faces" and just really disrespectful nasty stuff. I am not saying you have to like women that are overweight. But you don't get to demean them just because you aren't attracted to them.

 

And this is what I see a lot of on LS. Men that completely demean and call women names or use language like 'fatties" as grown adults! I mean come on. Wasn't "fatties" a name used in grade school? Why would you still carry these names around. It's one thing to not like a particular body type. It's another to call people names for it. And it's no different then using an ethnic or racial slur.

 

And by the way, keep telling herself what? That respect begets respect? That's just common sense. Women don't respect men that are ruled by their penis. Men don't respect women that are ruled by their emotions. These are the basic ABCs of men and women.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

My sister, involved with a much older man, has dealt with disapproving looks from older women when she's been out with him. She also overheard teenage girls, saying something like, "She's just a baby!" in relation to her being with him (she was in her twenties, but looked like a teenager, at the time).

 

I've only seen women here have a problem with men exclusively going for youth, rather than just happening to hit it off and develop a relationship with a younger woman.

 

Exactly. It's one thing for a man to happen to develop a relationship with a reasonably younger woman. It's another to exclusively seek it out and condemn women your own age.

[123321]

I agree that age should factor in when looking to start a family.

 

With the huge increase of children who have Autism and Bipolar, being linked to fathers who are older, women would do well to choose a younger man as well.

 

Also, I can’t imagine my child’s father hitting retirement age when he/she is ready to go off to college. Makes me wonder how many fathers,who waited to have children, will actually see them graduate, get married or ever know their grandchildren.

 

Women need to start looking at the age of the fathers they are picking for their children as well. The younger both parents are the better their chance of having a healthy child and an uneventful pregnancy.

 

I don’t ‘blame’ men for wanting to date a younger woman. Like I said before youth is attractive for both genders. I just see it as kind of pathetic.The reality is most men cannot be ‘sugar daddies’, but will spend their hard earned money like they can afford it, on a young woman in the hopes she will give him a chance. When all she cares about is his money; not him. I’m not saying that in some cases this can’t work out, but just that it is rare.

 

I want to be quick, but I'll address your points. First,the overall risk for autism and such are quite low, and the increased risk associated with paternal age is around 57%, on an incidence of less than 1%, meaning that depending on the study the increased risk seems to be either small or undetectable. This is not the case with disorders like trisomy where the total risk goes from small to large depending on the mothers age. Also, some studies showed an increased risk for older father only when the mother was also older, but not if she was younger.

 

As for grandkids, well I'm hoping for the best.

 

As for sugar daddies, the woman I'm currently dating is actually one of the mos frugal I've ever known and the most rapacious two that I ever dated were among the oldest, I'm fairly convinced that gold diggers come in all ages and improve their skills as they age.

 

Finally, this is a thread about older men dating younger women; we cannot change our age, there are some things I cannot control, but there are some things I can. I'll leave it to you to sort out which are which.

[Badsingularity]

This doesn't answer my questions.

 

How do you ahve a deep and trusting relationship when men view you as a depreciating value?

 

 

Wow. It's almost as if you literally don't read anything in my posts. It's like you see it and then respond without reading it.

 

I do not view women as depriciating in value as they age. I am a man.

 

I view a women who works on her insecurity issues and trys to understand men as highly valuable.

[Badsingularity]

I refuse to apply other standards to men than I apply to women. I judge men by their qualities as a human beings. The fact that fact that someone is a man will never justify bad behaviour.

Men who only want a younger woman and treat women their age with contempt are not mature adult men. They just have a fetish and are unable to love a woman.

 

 

Why are you responding to me with this?

 

What do you mean "bad behaviour" people finding certains triats attracive is not bad behaviour. It's normal.

 

Where did I say it was ok for men to treat older women with contempt?

[Badsingularity]

It's obvious some of the folks posting in this thread have major issues that are holding them back from forming happy relationships with the opposite gender.

 

If you ever want to have a happy trusting relationship with someone you need to work on these issues.

 

I'm not the type who will continue trying to help people that basically call me a liar. Be miserable with your issues or fix them and be happy.

[xxoo]

This doesn't answer my questions.

 

How do you ahve a deep and trusting relationship when men view you as a depreciating value?

 

Clearly a lot of men tie up women's worth and value in their age and looks. There are several male posters here that have pretty much summed up the worth of women to being young and pretty. I feel like you are ignoring this and instead you want women to look onto men with a kittens and rainbows attitude and smile when men tell them they like younger women.

 

Okay, men and women are different. But how do you even have relationships with a men if they see your worth in your age and looks and tell you how crappy and worthless you are as you get older?

 

Men (in general) aren't telling women they are crappy as they get older. A few trolls do, but not men in general.

 

First of all, there is a difference between not being generally sexually attracted to women in XX age range and thinking women in XX age range are crappy and worthless. A man can think that an 80 year old woman is an amazing person, and respect her deeply, but not be sexually attracted to her. Replace with any age, and this is still true.

 

Secondly, just because a man is initially more attracted to a woman in a lower age range (and I think some of this is simply logical--youth is beautiful), doesn't mean he will lose attraction for her as she ages. Especially if he falls in love and stays in love, he will always see her as the youthful beauty he fell in love with. Even when she is 99.

 

Third, men can fall in love with a "youthful beauty" of any age. If he looks in your eyes and sees "youthful beauty" (whether you are 19 or 69), he will be attracted. He might see that in 90% of all 20 year olds, and only 5% of all 40 years olds, but if you stay youthful in energy and attitude, men will be attracted.

 

But the bitterness and negativity is the opposite of youthful energy and attitude, so it can be a self-fulfilling prophesy.

[phineas]

My sister, involved with a much older man, has dealt with disapproving looks from older women when she's been out with him. She also overheard teenage girls, saying something like, "She's just a baby!" in relation to her being with him (she was in her twenties, but looked like a teenager, at the time).

 

I've only seen women here have a problem with men exclusively going for youth, rather than just happening to hit it off and develop a relationship with a younger woman.

 

Not what I asked.

 

Again, have you seen any threads by women on this forum in a rage over younger women dating older men?

[phineas]

That goes both ways...

 

sense...you make none.

 

Please explain because the message from women in this thread (the angry one's) are people need to date in their age group.

[Anela]

sense...you make none.

 

Please explain because the message from women in this thread (the angry one's) are people need to date in their age group.

 

You were talking about men over a certain age, not taking crap from women, and I was pointing out that women over a certain age tend to stop taking crap from men as well.

[phineas]

So you’re saying that men will put up with being disrespected as long as the woman is young and hot?

 

Respect is a two way street. If you find you’re not being respected than perhaps you should look at yourself to see what part you’re playing in that. Some people, men and women, are disrespectful to everyone they encounter, but the majority of people (I have run across) give respect until it’s shown not to be deserved.

 

*cough*…*B*…*cough*…*S*…So you find Dr.Ruth attractive, huh?

 

If (at first) you find the woman physically attractive, then this is a quality worth looking for, but by itself will not make a woman attractive to a man.

There are a lot of men and women whose thoughts, ideas and intellect I admire, but that doesn’t make them attractive to me.

 

I agree that age should factor in when looking to start a family.

 

With the huge increase of children who have Autism and Bipolar, being linked to fathers who are older, women would do well to choose a younger man as well.

 

Also, I can’t imagine my child’s father hitting retirement age when he/she is ready to go off to college. Makes me wonder how many fathers,who waited to have children, will actually see them graduate, get married or ever know their grandchildren.

 

Women need to start looking at the age of the fathers they are picking for their children as well. The younger both parents are the better their chance of having a healthy child and an uneventful pregnancy.

 

I don’t ‘blame’ men for wanting to date a younger woman. Like I said before youth is attractive for both genders. I just see it as kind of pathetic.The reality is most men cannot be ‘sugar daddies’, but will spend their hard earned money like they can afford it, on a young woman in the hopes she will give him a chance. When all she cares about is his money; not him. I’m not saying that in some cases this can’t work out, but just that it is rare.

 

I was going to reply but but after reading I see nothing but straw man arguments and i'm not going to waste my time parsing that out

 

A straw man is a component of an argument and is an informal fallacy based on misrepresentation of an opponent's position.[1] To "attack a straw man" is to create the illusion of having refuted a proposition by replacing it with a superficially similar yet unequivalent proposition (the "straw man"), and refuting it, without ever having actually refuted the original position.[1][2]

 

So why don't you try again.

[Anela]

Not what I asked.

 

Again, have you seen any threads by women on this forum in a rage over younger women dating older men?

 

Not recently, but I have witnessed negative opinions and looks, from both young and older women, when it comes to either thing: young women going after an older man, for whatever reason, or older men chasing the younger women.

So has my sister, who is a younger woman involved with an older man. She has received judgement from older women for being involved with him. Younger women, too, although they tended to aim their judgement more at him.

Edited April 2, 2012 by Anela

[phineas]

Phineas you come off as bitter with a chip on your shoulder. And it's not just because you have preferences regarding age or looks. It's the langugage you use to describe women that don't fit into your ideals. You make comments about "women stuffing their faces" and just really disrespectful nasty stuff. I am not saying you have to like women that are overweight. But you don't get to demean them just because you aren't attracted to them.

 

"women stuffing their faces" ? Really?

Perhaps you are too sensitive for the internet if that offends you so much.

 

Ok. What other "just really disrespectful nasty stuff" have I said about women on this forum.

Quote it.

 

I say you are lying & making it up.

I love women and show respect to those who don't jump on every man's post calling them bitter.

 

The fact you do that all the time toward men on this forum for the littlest things show's who the real bitter one here is.

just because I don't like you don't try & claim I don't like ALL women.

I just don't like you.

 

There is just something about pretentious bish's that try to put people down & make them feel guilty for having a preference in who they date.

 

 

And this is what I see a lot of on LS. Men that completely demean and call women names or use language like 'fatties" as grown adults! I mean come on. Wasn't "fatties" a name used in grade school? Why would you still carry these names around. It's one thing to not like a particular body type. It's another to call people names for it. And it's no different then using an ethnic or racial slur.

 

Have I used the word "fattie?"

If I have, quote the post. Otherwise post about it elsewhere & don't try to attribute it to me.

 

If you are complaining about other men on this forum, well....

 

I don't see you policing the other women on this forum so don't expect me to police the other men.

 

And by the way, keep telling herself what? That respect begets respect? That's just common sense. Women don't respect men that are ruled by their penis. Men don't respect women that are ruled by their emotions. These are the basic ABCs of men and women.

 

 

But if the older men were being disrespectful to younger women, then how are these guys getting them?

 

hmmm?

[phineas]

You were talking about men over a certain age, not taking crap from women, and I was pointing out that women over a certain age tend to stop taking crap from men as well.

 

And?

Unless those women start dating younger guys as an alternative it still doesn't apply.

It's just a useless tit-for-tat.

[phineas]

Not recently, but I have witnessed negative opinions and looks, from both young and older women, when it comes to either thing: young women going after an older man, for whatever reason, or older men chasing the younger women.

So has my sister, who is a younger woman involved with an older man. She has received judgement from older women for being involved with him. Younger women, too, although they tended to aim their judgement more at him.

 

In this thread a few women have claimed they dated older men.

Yet the men are still the one's getting bashed.

If a woman on this thread bashed one of those women I missed it.

 

Which is my point.

Only these men who prefer younger women are getting bashed & not the younger women who prefer men.

 

How many pages is this thread?

How many women posting in it?

 

You'd think at least one woman would of taken a run at the younger girls taking their men away.

[Anela]

And?

Unless those women start dating younger guys as an alternative it still doesn't apply.

It's just a useless tit-for-tat.

 

I see a lot of that around here.