ponsettia Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 I can only call my family dysfunctional. My parents got married 'later in life' - well for the 1950s it was later in life! Had two sons, then had me (daughter). We've moved house about 6 times since I was born - all for legitimate reasons. My father had an accident and damaged his hip, we had to move so he could take up a desk job, then we had to move because he developed arthritis and couldn't cope with the stairs, then because the cold weather was aggravating his arthritis ... you get the idea. I moved in with them about 15 years ago when Dad had a heart attack, then my mother fell over, then she fell again, and again, and again. She couldn't go out of the house without falling over. She was eventually diagnosed with a Parkinson's like condition (her legs will suddenly seize up, or start shaking), and I ended up having to stay with them permanently. Dad ended up in a wheelchair, the house they were in was about 100 years old and not designed for a wheelchair. I spent nearly 5 years trying to get them to sell the house. Why did it take 5 years? Because my mother refused to let Dad sell the house. All down the years the house had only been in Dad's name, until they bought that house - she made him put her name on the deeds, and now she was getting her revenge on him for making them move house so many times. Did I mention my mother has a bi-polar type disorder as well (it's all part of the not being able to walk thing)? She got really really nasty about it, I tried getting other [professional health care people] to speak to her about it. She got angry at me for talking about her behind her back (she's almost a paranoid schizophrenic), the doctors acknowledged that she has a severe mental health problem but wouldn't declare her to be incompetent or anything that would have given Dad or me legal right to ignore her objections to selling the house. Eventually I caught her on a 'good' day and she agreed to sell, I went straight to an Agent (who had a suitable house on his books) to put our house up for sale. I texted my brothers to tell them, and asked them not to ring mother about it. They rang her. I nearly ended up getting into serious legal trouble over the fiasco, she managed to convince my brothers that I was selling the house "out from under her" and she was terrified as to what was going to become of her (no mention of Dad though!). After six months of screaming arguments, the house went up for sale and was very quickly sold, and thankfully the other house hadn't sold in the meantime! Since then Dad has passed away, and my mother has now developed Dementia (yup, all part of that can't walk properly thing). When Dad died his solicitor read out his Wills (yes, plural) he'd two Wills, one where if he passed away first he left the house to mother and the other being if he was the surviving spouse he left the house to me. Apparently both of my brothers think the second Will (which is completely invalid) was "the" Will and a huge fight broke out over me being given a house for no good reason (15 years caring for both parents single handed to the detriment of my health, personal, and professional life isn't "no good reason"!). One brother hardly speaks to me, he got married a few years ago and I wasn't invited to the wedding. The other brother won't speak to me at all. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 OK. As far as i can tell, you've got a lot going on. you have an alcoholic friend who's disappeared off the radar, this thread about your dysfunctional family that jumps to conclusions and never seems to talk about anything, and a whole stack of male friends who are nothing more - yet you're a couch potato whose hobbies include surfing the net riding and reading. and you're single with no kids. You haven't posted a single question, but have told us all this, because.... why exactly? why not open up a blog and write everything there? this is a relationships forum and one where people come seeking input, comfort, solace and support. I'm not quite sure where you're going with your 2 threads.... What can we do for you? Link to post Share on other sites
Author ponsettia Posted April 7, 2012 Author Share Posted April 7, 2012 You haven't posted a single question, but have told us all this, because.... reference for future postings. Instead of having to type out the same thing over and over, I can post a link to the relevant thread. why exactly? this is a relationships forum and one where people come seeking input, comfort, solace and support. Because this is a board about relationships and I was hoping I'd get some support, suggestions or other input as to what I can do/where I can go with my life... why not open up a blog and write everything there? and that's where someone suggested I join this board, since a blog wasn't exactly the most constructive way of getting support/suggestions etc. Thanks for your interest Link to post Share on other sites
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