Would you consider this conversation okay?

[pepsimanlf]

Okay, so here's the dealio:

 

My girlfriend used to have feelings for this guy for about a year after he moved. She would tell him everything in her life, flirt a lot, and tell him she loves him all the time. She never kissed or done anything. Well, time passed and I came along and she fell for me.

 

However, I found early in the she still told him she loved him, but she assured me it was like a brother. Like she wishes she was his big brother because he helped her out a lot.

 

[Months passed. She sometimes still felt heartbroken due to her previous relationship before me that happened like a year ago. A guy liked her, she wasn't direct with him that she was not interested him at all in him. The creep tried to kiss her, she told me, they stopped talking. etc. A bunch of drama per say. She really really loves me. However, she has broken my heart before and betrayed me emotionally before.]

 

Well, anyway my trust in her has been shaky. So I looked through her texts today and remember the guy she had feelings with? This is a paraphrase of what the conversation was:

 

He was sick, but not hospitalized, so she checked up on him. Told him she loved him. Now here's what happened next:

 

[He]: So would you be mad if you had to come to see me at the hospital?

[she]: Yes boy! You had to take care of yourself better

[He]: But I would feel bad

[she]: If you look at me with those eyes as you told me through that text. no i would not be.

[He]: Aww that's sweet.

[she]: I love you!!!

[He]: Lol I love you too.

 

 

This happened at a week were "she just didn't feel like talking to me or anybody". She sent me one word texts and basically told me nothing. But he gets all that? The guy is fine.

 

Oh and he's had a girlfriend for almost 5 months now.

 

So is that appropriate. It clearly was very romantic as she loves him more than a friend. Like I don't think that's a regular conversation.

 

What do you guys think?

[gaius]

I think you're getting leftover attention. He's getting the main course.

[CC12]

I can't really trust your paraphrased version of what was said because it seems like you already know what kind of answers you want to hear. I wonder if the part you paraphrased would have a different meaning in the context of the rest of the conversation.

 

But apart from that, it seems that there are some other problems in your relationship, like her not being over an ex, her not "feeling like" talking to you for a week, her having betrayed you before, and you snooping through her things because you don't trust her. You really shouldn't even feel the need to do that in a healthy relationship.

 

So I don't know what that conversation meant or if it was inappropriate (probably yes,) but my advice would be to make those texts the final straw to start reevaluating your relationship.

[chucksagent]

She seems uneducated and a flirt. Two things I would never date. Uneducated people are triple as likely to cheat and usually have low self esteem. Flirty people crave on attention and you will never be able to fill that void the dude she is texting left. Sorry man, I know women are cold, but it's like anything else - you're better getting out now. It'll hurt less.

[Chi townD]

Apparently "SHE LOVES HIM :D" ....puke.

 

Time to kick this one to the curb and move on. She isn't worth your time. She wants to invest her time and feelings into someone that she can't have? Fine, let her.

 

Time to let her go and move on. You deserve better....and you know it.

[Professor X]

She's obviously NOT over him and you're obviously a fool if you buy into her "he's like a brother to me" crap.

 

Sorry, but if he were to tell her he wants her, you can be sure she'd be gone in a split second.

She had feelings for him, those don't just magically change to family feelings, lol.

 

What baffles me is, as you said "It clearly was very romantic as she loves him more than a friend" - if you know this, than what on earth are you still doing with her??? Wasting time and opportunities I suppose.

[loversquarrel]

You have more red flags here than necessary. You have more than enough info here to confirm your feelings plus your own gut. Trust yourself and move on, you will end up very hurt in the end if you stay.

[veggirl]

You are being played like a fiddle.

 

Does she talk like that to her girl friends? Or to her ACTUAL siblings? I'm guessing not, although I'm sure you have an excuse for her for that as well. Wow, I can't even imagine putting up with BS like that. Dump her, asap.....you are in for a world of hurt and drama if you don't.