Dealing with the stages of separation

[ridinbikes247]

9 weeks of separation and now my EX is starting to be the biggest Bit*h in the world !! I just got back from the park to watch our 4 year old boy play baseball and she was not there with him - I called her numerous times and finally after 30 minutes she answerd with a "what" . I asked her where our son was and she replied "ohh, the game got cancelled, and forgot to tell you, but i gotta go" Then she hung up - I just dont understand the stages she is going through .

I left her because she chose to be single and started partying and told me I could either stay or go. So I left. after 2 months of feeling like a stranger i got tired of it

Weeks 1 and 2 - "she called everyday.She said love you and missed me

Weeks 3 and 4 - "she stopped saying I love you and told me we should stop being "friends" She was ready for separation papers

Weeks 5 and 6 - We got our papers and she started talking more on the phone. We became civil. She took our family pictures down finally in the household.

week 7 until now - She will not answer phone calls and ignores all my text. she will not tell me nothing going on in her life. I am getting so pissed at her for the way she is acting. Just 5 weeks ago we were very civil. I understand we are broke up now but I just miss talking to the Wife I use to have. She was so caring and now she is a total monster. Are the stages we went through normal - by her ignoring me, does that mean she may feel guilty ? or she really dosent care ?

[ridinbikes247]

Also, we are both 26 - When i first left we just defriended each other on facebook - around 2 weeks ago she blocked me. She said she dosent want me seeing what she is doing ??? I just dont understand her right now !!

[dsw31]

I am so sorry you are going through this.I can't even imagine your pain since I don't have a child with my ex but, it sounds like she is dating someone else.I hope you can realize that you don't need someone in your life who can do that to you.Now-I gotta tell myself the same thing.We will be okay one day

[ridinbikes247]

Another guy could be possible, but she left me for for her divorced friends - come to find out, 2 weeks ago some of them went back to there husbands and now my wife is out to dry. She has been spending alot of time with her parents and sister so I here. I figured she would call me and maybe try to at least talk

[momto3boys]

i am going through a separation. Here is the stages i have gone through:

 

first stage- i went straight to NC, didnt talk to him for a good 3 weeks, he did talk to our son but i let my son answer his calls and hang up when hes gone. No emails, nothing from me.

 

stage 2- then i got sad and paranoid that he is with someone else (which i have no control over but still)

 

but THEN he wrote me this email telling me he was over me, didnt love me, etc. So that moved on to stage 3

 

stage 3: i got VERY angry. I became short with him, told him i didnt want to talk to him, i filed for child support, and made an appointment with a lawyer. I became COLD with him and he is not use to that. He then turned around and started being nice to me again, which leads me to stage 4.

 

stage 4: civil

 

Im now back to NC and seeming like i dont care, its easier for me to deal with.

[ridinbikes247]

To anyone who has been in my situation. After a break up and 2 or 3 months later your wife/husband has a new partner, Does it get easier now that there is closure ? or will it re open the wound ? I feel like If I could catch her with another guy, It may ease the pain a little. Then I could look at her with a disgusted face and know deep down she isnt what I want

[Nanette]

1. Husband left a note on the table 4 days before christmas and the day before IRS auditor was coming back for an explanation of items on taxes we filed but he filled out. I was hysterical barely got through the night . He would not answer his phone I had no idea where he was. (tax audit reveled lots of decustions for business expenses involving motels and bars that were not legitimatly part of farm business. Sons car is missing he had taken it sold it by forging sons name:sick:

2 2 months later still no contact despite my and childrens repeated calls. However while I was at work he stopped in and picked up items to sell Oldest son went to his work and when he went out the back door had 4 of his HS buddies there to detain him they got into a fist fight

3 ,3 months Middle childs birthday and he did show up with an innappropriate cheap present purchased at a gas station We did not talk beyond small talk .

4 4 months Friends report seing his car at neighboring town overnights in front of a single womans home. they revealed they had seen it there off an on for two years.Still no callsor visits to children

6 months later I filed for divorce and started getting some child support .

[ridinbikes247]

Just needing to vent !!! Going on the 10th week and I have no idea how I'm feeling anymore. The first month after I left I was getting along good. I guess now, a little over 2 months, I think reality is setting in ?

I miss talking to my wife so bad. It hurts so bad when I dont know what or where she is for days at a time. It hurts when the only way she will contact me is via TEXT. If I call her she will just blow me off and say she is busy. I miss my old wife who use to ask how my day was and ask me questions. I want to call her through out the day and try to get her to talk, but I hold back the urge.

I miss who my wife USE to be... what hurts more, is watching her with friends have the time of her life. Everyone keeps saying G.I.G.S and she should regret it, but 10 weeks in and she is showing no signs of regret or trying to reconcile.....