and Scared

[heartinajar]

Well I have a update on my situation. My wife and I are working it out. The sepaeration will not be happening. We have broken down the boxes she was collecting for moving and have incorporated alot of the things she was going to take into our home.

 

We are not 100% by any stretch of the imagination however she loves me and wants to try and work it out. She does have one foot kind of still out the door as the money is still split and she has mentioned that if things go back to the way they were she couldnt say she woundt leave.

 

However for me this is a HUGE victory. We both realized we needed time as husband and wife to work on things. We have started date nights that have really helped us to remember why we got married in the first place.

 

Alot of it I think came down to me taking better care of myself and showing unconditional love for my wife. Thier has been alot of advice from people on how to treat your STBX but it all boils down to what you think will work and what wont.

 

I went with a different stradegy than most and it has really paid huge dividens for me. Wish me luck as we now go from seperation to a marriage that needs some TLC.

[worldgonewrong]

She does have one foot kind of still out the door as the money is still split and she has mentioned that if things go back to the way they were she couldnt say she woundt leave.

 

God bless, re the whole post. I truly hope it works out.

 

But re what you wrote above here - you can't live in a marriage where one party keeps you living under a veiled threat. What's HER responsibility to fix things and is she articulating it? She needs to articulate her own accountability too rather than making the veiled threat the most prominent thing on the table.

[jaymz]

Just to echo WGW: you are both responsable 100% for your 50% of the marriage. Get as much help as you can for you both to work this out and build a much better marriage.

 

Best of luck

 

It's nice to hear success stories