What are the characteristics of a nice guy (in a positive way)

[sam2012]

Hi

 

I've always considered myself a nice and even sweet guy. But lately I'm thinking maybe I'm not as nice and sweet as I thought.

 

Firstly I'm really sarcastic with a dry wit. This tends to make me always comment negatively about everything I see. It gets a laugh so it’s what I do.

 

Also I hardly ever show emotions. I'm so closed up I can't even bring myself to kiss my grandma or hug family members, friends etc.

I’m really shy and withdrawn which I suppose can come off as being ignorant.

 

Like I said I always thought people saw me as nice and sweet and that they'd see me with a girl and think "yeah, he deserves a bit of happiness".

 

So what would you say are characteristics that make someone a nice guy.

 

P.S. Yeah I know the whole “nice guys finish” last but I'm not talking so much about dating just in general.

[Philosoraptor]

The term "nice guy" is abused too much. I prefer to talk about a good person.

 

A good person is honest, caring, and does not intentionally bring harm to others.

[oldguy]

Hi

 

I've always considered myself a nice and even sweet guy. But lately I'm thinking maybe I'm not as nice and sweet as I thought.

 

Firstly I'm really sarcastic with a dry wit. This tends to make me always comment negatively about everything I see. It gets a laugh so it’s what I do.

It's a learned behavior you received positive feedback for. You can still have a dry wit without being cruel but the negative outlook is something you will want to work very hard to loose. You will internalize it & become a very negative person who will find little inner joy. It's a choice.

 

Also I hardly ever show emotions. I'm so closed up I can't even bring myself to kiss my grandma or hug family members, friends etc.

I’m really shy and withdrawn which I suppose can come off as being ignorant.

But you've found a vehicle that transforms you from being introverted to being extroverted. Many comedians actually got their start this way but there are things you can do to overcome this shyness to a great extent. Building confidence in other areas the way you have with humor.

 

Like I said I always thought people saw me as nice and sweet and that they'd see me with a girl and think "yeah, he deserves a bit of happiness".

I'd like to think of myself as a nice guy too, and I am. My friends & family will tell you I am because that is who I present myself as to them. People who I've been in competition with would not agree with that at all however. You don't have to be nice all the time to everyone.

 

So what would you say are characteristics that make someone a nice guy.

Just like your wit, a jerk or a nice person is a behavioral pattern that has been learned. Your a nice guy who's found an outlet to being a bit of a jerk through your style of humor. Cultivate the qualities within you that you admire most in others.

 

P.S. Yeah I know the whole “nice guys finish” last but I'm not talking so much about dating just in general.

Nice guys finish last depending on who is keeping score.

Edited April 11, 2012 by oldguy

[Eve]

*Eve ignores everything being said*

 

... What? Oldguy, is that really a picture of you?

 

Wow..

 

Take care,

Eve x

[Mr Scorpio]

If you aren't talking about it in a dating specific context, I would refer to the idea as a "nice person" instead of a "nice guy". But Philo pretty much hit it on the head. Someone who is kind, thoughtful, and helps others when they can.

[sam2012]

Thanks for the replies guys. Gave me some stuff to think about