bluebells2 Posted June 17, 2004 Share Posted June 17, 2004 I found a birthday card in my husbands briefcase from a friend girl of his. She wants more, Does it sound like from the card she is more? I hope this year you find love and success. I thank god everyday that you are in my life.----Susan Link to post Share on other sites
kirkyswife Posted June 17, 2004 Share Posted June 17, 2004 Did you ask your husband about the card? If you didn't - did you ask her? I'm about getting to the bottom of it - to hell with speculation. Honey what the hell does she mean and if I don't like his response talk to her woman to woman - but just from the text I'd say it's possible it's more. Link to post Share on other sites
uriel Posted June 17, 2004 Share Posted June 17, 2004 Impossible to tell from the card. At the very least, I'll say it's not appropriate for a woman to give to a married man of comparable age. It's that last sentence that's the zinger. You might talk to your husband about this and see what he says about what he think she means by it and why he accepted it from her and didn't tell you about it, given its questionable tone. Even if you feel you can't 100% believe him (which would be very sad to think), you will still get some sense of his reaction. -- uriel Link to post Share on other sites
Author bluebells2 Posted June 17, 2004 Author Share Posted June 17, 2004 Oh and I forgot to add it had perfume and a lipstick kiss. I confronted him about it and about a phone call she made to me. She has told me that she was his girlfriend and they had a relationship while I was pregnant. My husband says, they were friends and not more. He says she has a crush on him...which I already knew. She also told me a bunch of lies that I know my husband never said. He also has cut contact w/ her and switched jobs to be away from her. This was a big deal and I told him he would need to leave if I found out he was cheating. I have a newborn baby so I don't want this crap around my child. He says he loves us and never intends to leave us. To prove it, he changed jobs and does not talk to her anymore. She is unstable and has left threatening notes for him. He sent his new boss an email stating they had an affair. She sent an email around his old job saying they had an affair. She swears she never knew he had a child. That is impossible though because he LOVES his child. What do you think? Link to post Share on other sites
kirkyswife Posted June 17, 2004 Share Posted June 17, 2004 My goodness that's a lot to deal with and a newborn as well. Doesn't feel very "just friends" to me, but I don't know your husband. I guess the question is what do you thinik? What is your gut telling you? I mean not the one that second guesses your first voice, what is your first voice saying to you - that's your answer right there. The lipstick kiss and the phone call - unstable or lovesick - I don't know, she's going way out on a limb to let you know how she feels - what does she stand to gain at this point? Listen to your first voice and that's where your answer will be! Link to post Share on other sites
Debster Posted June 17, 2004 Share Posted June 17, 2004 I doubt it is a platonic card. It's pretty stupid that she would write in a married man's birthday card that she hopes they find love this year. The thanking every day part makes me thing this woman is definitely sending the 'I'm ready, willing and available' signal to your husband. On a later post you said it had perfume and a lipstick kiss - that seals it, IMO - she wants him. Thing is though, no matter how badly she wants your husband, she isn't going to get him - IF you trust him. The fact that he changed jobs and broke off all contact with her is a good sign. However, the obsessiveness on her side makes me thing that while it might not be going on now, something might have in the past. Geez, it always pisses me off when a woman knowingly tries to steal someone else's man. I feel for you. Link to post Share on other sites
Debster Posted June 17, 2004 Share Posted June 17, 2004 When was your husband's birthday? If it was a while ago then he is hanging on to it. Why? If it was recent, that makes it a bit more understandable. BUT If he really was devoted to you and cut off all contact - he would not have kept the card. OR he would have kept it to show/tell you to keep you in the loop that this woman is still on the prowl. That he didn't tell you is disturbing - especially with the info you shared in your later post. Either way, it shows that your husband is not too swift when it comes to women. A woman that much on the prowl should have sent off HUGE warning bells to him. The fact that he had a friendship with her.... well makes me thing that maybe it was more than one-sided. Link to post Share on other sites
thecake Posted June 17, 2004 Share Posted June 17, 2004 I think that card screams of there being more to it than friends....lipstick? Perfume? Unless she's stalking him...then you can always get the police involved. Was there an envelope with the card? Was it mailed to him? Why was he carrying it around? How did he get it? You certainly don't need this stress in your life right now. You mentioned that if he had in fact had an affair you would make him leave, right? I'm sure what she has told you could easily be verified if you wanted to know the real truth and find out if your husband has been lying. Ask her for "proof". Link to post Share on other sites
tiki Posted June 17, 2004 Share Posted June 17, 2004 Originally posted by thecake Ask her for "proof". Excellent idea! And do you know for sure he wasn't ASKED to leave the company? Did you see his resignation letter? I'd have a lot of questions...and it's his job to prove to you that he's not guilty. People have affairs even with newborns involved. Sometimes it's an irrational decision where nothing could hold you back from getting what you want. Ya lose touch with reality sometimes when you want something *that* bad. Link to post Share on other sites
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