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How To Tell A Girl You Love Her When You're Too Shy?


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OK, hey guys. I'm not gonna reveal any names, so I will be "B" and the girl I love is "R". I am 14, and she is 15. I've known her for about 2-3 years, and felt attracted to her as soon as I met her. She isn't my "first love", but is one of the most beautiful people I have ever met, as well as being kind and considerate and funny. Whenever we talk, she always manages to make me laugh, even when I'm feeling down. We always smile, and I really think we are good friends. She also helped me through a bad time when I had lost a family member.

 

The thing is, I have no way of telling her I love her without getting too embarrassed. I can't really talk to girls, whether I like them or not (as long as they're not family) or even guys that I don't know that well. :o

 

I just really want ways to let her know I am interested in her, but not in a cliché kind of way, like bringing in flowers, and trying to woo her with old fashioned love lines out of some bad 80-s show. A quick heads up, I only see her once a week, because I see her on a Saturday as we are in the same orchestra.

 

PLEASE, I really need help, because as soon as I start to think of her, I get major butterflies in my stomach. Talking to her isn't hard, but as soon as I try to find a way to say something romantic or kind or sweet to her, my brain freezes, and I throw that idea away, instead saying some sort of joke that usually, but not all the time, manages to make her laugh, or at least grin. I'm not really a looker, and I sometimes stutter over some of my words. Is there a way to get her to realise I like her in *that way* without coming across as creepy, old-fashioned or like some sort of Casanova(which I'm not), as well as not embarrassing me. All USEFUL/CONSTRUCTIVE advice will be sorely needed.

 

Hopefully Thanking You in Advance,

B*****

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ALSO: Another worry I have is telling me parents. They only want "the best" for me, but I know that she is the ONE. My mum might know I like her, but I don't know.

 

Thanks (Again),

B*****

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Philosoraptor

Ok, you're very young and while I will not dispute your feelings I will say that it is very rare for anything to make it much past high school.

 

Are you dating this girl at all? You can't just walk up to someone and randomly claim love, as you might love them as a friend, but have no idea what the romantic compatibility might be.

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  • 3 weeks later...
Melbufama
OK, hey guys. I'm not gonna reveal any names, so I will be "B" and the girl I love is "R". I am 14, and she is 15. I've known her for about 2-3 years, and felt attracted to her as soon as I met her. She isn't my "first love", but is one of the most beautiful people I have ever met, as well as being kind and considerate and funny. Whenever we talk, she always manages to make me laugh, even when I'm feeling down. We always smile, and I really think we are good friends. She also helped me through a bad time when I had lost a family member.

 

The thing is, I have no way of telling her I love her without getting too embarrassed. I can't really talk to girls, whether I like them or not (as long as they're not family) or even guys that I don't know that well. :o

 

I just really want ways to let her know I am interested in her, but not in a cliché kind of way, like bringing in flowers, and trying to woo her with old fashioned love lines out of some bad 80-s show. A quick heads up, I only see her once a week, because I see her on a Saturday as we are in the same orchestra.

 

PLEASE, I really need help, because as soon as I start to think of her, I get major butterflies in my stomach. Talking to her isn't hard, but as soon as I try to find a way to say something romantic or kind or sweet to her, my brain freezes, and I throw that idea away, instead saying some sort of joke that usually, but not all the time, manages to make her laugh, or at least grin. I'm not really a looker, and I sometimes stutter over some of my words. Is there a way to get her to realise I like her in *that way* without coming across as creepy, old-fashioned or like some sort of Casanova(which I'm not), as well as not embarrassing me. All USEFUL/CONSTRUCTIVE advice will be sorely needed.

 

Hopefully Thanking You in Advance,

B*****

 

I suggest just asking her out, and DO NOT do that old fashion romantic crap, Most women dont even like that crap, its fine to do it after a while of dating everyone once in a while. Also do not tell her you love her. Seriously play it cool have some self control.

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  • 3 weeks later...
gearsofwar

I agree, I think you'll be far better off simply offering to 'hang out' with her like go for a smoothie or something you'll both enjoy doing together. (Personally I’d avoid the movies as you'll just be sat in silence almost for 90-120mins).

 

I wouldn't never confess your attraction in vocal form, just play it cool and 'test the water', stuff like if your walking side by side in the mall, notice if she bumps into your arm on occasions, it looks totally accidental but usually isn't (unless she’s generally clumsy of course ), its normally a cue that she wants an excuse to touch you or be in your personal space.

Another little thing is playfully pick on a 'very mild' insecurity (something like a hair band, or something that stands out to you, like polka dot socks etc. and give her a 'nickname' for the remainder of the date but don't overuse it (avoid weight/bad teeth/imperfections etc. as this is will be counter productive)

 

If she responds, you'll chance to get a playful punch/slap on the arm (again coaxing her to get into your personal space) and you'll purposely over react with an 'OW' or 'OUCH'. I’m sure you'll get a positive response and get some good rapport going.

 

Most importantly just try relax, be yourself and above all have fun :laugh:

 

Hope this helps

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Professor X

Nothing we'll say will make you change they way you feel (shy), but I will tell you how things will roll out if you choose to wait and shy out:

 

You and her will keep talking, be close, like one another, she might be a shy person herself when it comes to those matter or she simply is "old fashioned" and would expect the guy to ask her out. You won't - cause you're to shy. She will slowly lose interest in you because she'll assume you're not into her (what else would explain you two talking for so long without you making a move? and shyness isn't an excuse).

She's 15, she's young and she's attractive. A new guy who is not shy will approach her, talk to him for a bit, get friendly with her and will ask her out. She will of course say yes, because, well, you aren't into her and she thinks he's cute.

They'll date, kiss, she will tell you of this because you are friends. You will feel sad, but not heartbroken yet. You'll hang around her because you love her and you'll convince others that you care for her (which is bullox - you love her).

She'll keep dating him, and they will sleep together, maybe in a month maybe in 6. But when they do she will tell you of this and THEN you'll be heartbroken.

 

Or, you could just ask her out and see where it goes.

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