How, or if, to ask a girl you are dating if she has breast implants

[joystickd]

sensitive women here:eek:. Calm down.

[TheBigQuestion]

He has a pervasive pattern of insulting people in various threads, hence why I can no longer see his posts unless someone quotes him.

 

I don't pay enough attention to any single poster to know if that's actually true, but it doesn't change the fact that he didn't insult RedRobin. He thinks the comparison she is making between people who get plastic surgery out of pure vanity and people who get plastic surgery after becoming deformed by a debilitating disease is silly, mostly because it is. The fact that anyone is trying to say that his simple (if spirited) disagreement with one poster's comparison is somehow insulting that poster is downright absurd.

[kaylan]

... AND telling us what is or is not cosmetic.

 

ANY surgery that changes one's appearance and is not needed to cure an illness is cosmetic.

 

Including my mother's... Her implants were not necessary to cure an illness. It WAS necessary for her to feel 'normal' again. That is what she and my friends have in common.

Her surgery still doesnt compare to your friends. She was going back to the person she was before a serious illness changed her. Your friend on the other hand was becoming something she never was to begin with only because of a lack of self confidence.

 

The two arent comparable. Its not about what it or isnt cosmetic.

[Yookie]

Ok so if having a baby gives a woman horrible stretch marks and a pouchy belly that wont go away with exercise... then it's ok to see the surgeon? or does that make her superficial??? LOL:lmao:

[kaylan]

I don't pay enough attention to any single poster to know if that's actually true, but it doesn't change the fact that he didn't insult RedRobin. He thinks the comparison she is making between people who get plastic surgery out of pure vanity and people who get plastic surgery after becoming deformed by a debilitating disease is silly, mostly because it is. The fact that anyone is trying to say that his simple (if spirited) disagreement with one poster's comparison is somehow insulting that poster is downright absurd.

This.

 

Im done arguing this particular point. The bold is what is true in my view.

[Yookie]

Its cool....my bad if I was at all rude in my reply to you. And youre right...we are on a totally different side bar.

 

Im just advocating people love the skin they are in and be sexy with it. You dont need surgeries to be sexy. Surgery for what? To conform to what you think the opposite sex would want you to look like? Oh please.

 

And before anyone says "they got surgery for themselves"....no they didnt. The reason insecure men and women get purely cosmetic surgery in the first place is because other people make them think they should look different.

 

Be confident with the body you were born with.

 

I agree with you to a point... some things can't be fixed in the gym.

[RedRobin]

He thinks the comparison she is making between people who get plastic surgery out of pure vanity and people who get plastic surgery after becoming deformed by a debilitating disease is silly, mostly because it is.

 

I'll say the same thing to you that I did to Kaylan... having NO breasts feels like a deformity (to some women) whether it happens due to illness OR by birth. My sis and my friend had NO breasts. My mom had NO breasts after her cancer treatment.

 

Now.. carry on and keep telling us what the definition of cosmetic is.

[kaylan]

^I guess short men should think they are deformed and shell out thousands of dollars to stretch their shin bones huh?

 

I wonder what women would think?

 

Take me for instance...Im 5'9 and dont have awesome mesomoprh muscle building genetics...im an ectomorph...so I guess I can call myself deformed.

 

All semantics really that dont hold up well to scrutiny. All of the things I just said would be super silly to get surgery to change, unless a serious disease made me or other people the way we are.

 

So in the end, flat chested because of cancer? Ok and understandable reason to get surgery in almost everyones eyes.

 

Flat chested because of genetics? Ok to get surgery, but not comparable to the cancer case and less understandable to many people.

Edited April 21, 2012 by kaylan

[TheBigQuestion]

cosmetic (kɒzˈmɛtɪk)

 

— n

1. any preparation applied to the body, esp the face, with the intention of beautifying it

 

— adj

2. serving or designed to beautify the body, esp the face

3. having no other function than to beautify: cosmetic illustrations in a book

4. derogatory designed to cover up a greater flaw or deficiency; superficial: their resignation is a cosmetic exercise

 

That's what "cosmetic" means. I won't try to define it. That's what dictionaries are for.

[Star Gazer]

Short men do spend thousands of dollars to become taller. However, such surgery is extremely painful, takes a long time to perform/complete, is insanely expensive, requires a lengthy recovery, and very few physicians perform it. It's not a rare surgery because men don't want it.

 

A boob job is $5,000, done by thousands of doctors, requires only a few Vicodin pills, and you're home within 4 hours of entering the surgery center and back at work within a week and back at the gym within a few weeks.

 

When I got mine done, my first thought was, "Woah. This was a LOT easier than I thought it would be." It was almost scary, actually.

 

If boob jobs were as easy to get and experience as height increasing surgeries, the country would be FULL of much taller men.

[kaylan]

You know whats funny about this thread?

 

Women on this forum and in real life complain all the time about how superficial men are, and how we supposedly want them to look...and then they go ahead and play into all this crap we are purported to be doing.

 

A guy gets killed for preferring typical media figures of women and he gets killed for only wanting all natural women as well. You cant win.

 

From now on when women here complain about what men supposedly like in a woman, Im just gonna say "well maybe things would change if you and all your gender sisters pulled together and stopped playing into our hands"

[joystickd]

Short men do spend thousands of dollars to become taller. However, such surgery is extremely painful, takes a long time to perform/complete, is insanely expensive, requires a lengthy recovery, and very few physicians perform it. It's not a rare surgery because men don't want it.

 

A boob job is $5,000, done by thousands of doctors, requires only a few Vicodin pills, and you're home within 4 hours of entering the surgery center and back at work within a week and back at the gym within a few weeks.

 

When I got mine done, my first thought was, "Woah. This was a LOT easier than I thought it would be." It was almost scary, actually.

 

If boob jobs were as easy to get and experience as height increasing surgeries, the country would be FULL of much taller men.

 

Why so bent out of shape about his opinion? He didn't insult anyone. This is a forum and everyone is entitled to an opinion

[dasein]

Wrong. He's not saying "I only like the look/feel of real breasts." THAT would be a preference. He's making personal character attacks on women who have had cosmetic surgery. Huge difference.

 

I don't know whether you are talking in the context of the forum or generally, if the forum, , if generally, one might make a "character assessment," rightly or wrongly, based on implants, certainly not a "personal character attack" unless one stated as such as part of a face-to-face rejection.

[RedRobin]

He was plenty insulting and rude.

[joystickd]

Wrong. He's not saying "I only like the look/feel of real breasts." THAT would be a preference. He's making personal character attacks on women who have had cosmetic surgery. Huge difference.

I saw no personal character attacks on women. He simply stated his opinion. Why don't we all focus on the topic of how to ask if the woman you are dating has implants? Its has become a little too sensitive and there was no reason to get bent out of shape. No one said anything about you Star Gazer or Red Robin directly so save it.

[Star Gazer]

Why don't we all focus on the topic of how to ask if the woman you are dating has implants?

 

Kaylan hasn't answered that subject at all. I have, several times.

 

Its has become a little too sensitive and there was no reason to get bent out of shape. No one said anything about you Star Gazer or Red Robin directly so save it.

 

Just look at the way you and Kaylan have addressed people in this thread. It's totally unnecessary. I hope to G-d neither one of you are asking women the composition of her breasts.

[RedRobin]

cosmetic (kɒzˈmɛtɪk)

 

— n

1. any preparation applied to the body, esp the face, with the intention of beautifying it

 

— adj

2. serving or designed to beautify the body, esp the face

3. having no other function than to beautify: cosmetic illustrations in a book

4. derogatory designed to cover up a greater flaw or deficiency; superficial: their resignation is a cosmetic exercise

 

That's what "cosmetic" means. I won't try to define it. That's what dictionaries are for.

 

According to the dictionary, both my mom and my sis/friends had cosmetic surgery.

 

One is more acceptable to some than others. Me personally... I"m not going to shame my sister and friend for doing what they felt was right... or any other woman.

 

If a woman feels bad enough about her body to want surgery, then I'd say she deserves empathy (and maybe pity in some cases)... not scorn. But since all I see is 'scorn' here... and the kind of high-fiving, a**hole attracting scorn I've seen on so many other threads devoted to women's bodies... Well, there is no point in discussing further.

 

None of the men here have to have relationships with women who have plastic surgery. But you don't have to mock them either. Especially since none of you have breasts or even have a clue what it might be like to have them or not have them...

 

I've said it enough times already (here and other threads) that I'd prefer women find a way to be happy with their bodies.

[Star Gazer]

This isn't insulting??

 

Just a small sampling of a few posts, not all of them:

 

Lol @ women with implants. Lack of self confidence and getting fake body parts is totally unattractive.

 

I like women who put real work into looking good, not spending cash on shortcuts.

 

Gain a little weight to add fatty tissue to the breasts. Then hit the gym to perk up the breasts by working the muscles underneath.

 

I respect that more than a chick going under the knife taking the easy and lame way out.

 

The right diet and workout regimen can do a whole lot to a persons body. Insecure lazy folks simply get breast, pec, and butt implants since they dont want to try and put in any real work.

 

Id take a natural woman with A cups, over fake breast ANY day. A lot of guys would agree as well. A lot of guys dont like what fake breasts can mean about someone. The idea of being with someone who goes under the knife to be fake and something they really arent is not appealing to everyone.

 

Its one thing to see it in porn or movies, but it doesnt mean dudes respect it more. If your sis and her friend feel good about their implants, then good for them...but Im sure plenty of dudes were merely only interested cause they wanted to get a piece from them. Breasts arent going to find them a decent man. And some dudes will put a girl into a certain category and use her for pump and dump if they feel she does something vain and materialistic as theyd not wanna date such a woman. Thats the vibe plastic surgery gives off.

 

Lastly, I stand by how I feel about women who get plastic surgery. Its unattractive to me because it seems insecure, it shows a lack of confidence and is sometimes just an easy way out from doing hard work.

 

Getting purely cosmetic surgeries that have nothing to do with a medical condition or making a body function better is what I said was stupid. So dont compare insecure silly women to your mom who actually had a life threatening disease. You minimize your moms situation when you do that.

 

I only begrudge the ones who did it for purely superficial reasons. So sue me.

 

But like I said, I dont respect plastic surgery for the sake of pure cosmetics.

 

Again, your mom went through a medical situation...theres nothing wrong with her trying to go back to who she was before her affliction. Thats different from some insecure girl trying to become something she isnt.

 

When it comes to plastic surgery people opinions tend to be different based on the reason for the surgery. If its for purely cosmetic reasons, people might raise an eyebrow. If its because someones been disfigured due to accident or illness, we all give a thumbs up and say "good for him/her" for making it through a tough ordeal. Thats how it is. Most sympathize with sickness, not with anything that would be deemed purely vanity.

 

Im just being honest.

 

Im sorry, but when you compare your moms situation to that of insecure young women who are healthy...you an indeed minimizing her situation.

 

Yeah, he didn't just state "I prefer real breasts." His "opinion" is one big character attack.

[joystickd]

Kaylan hasn't answered that subject at all. I have, several times.

 

 

 

Just look at the way you and Kaylan have addressed people in this thread. It's totally unnecessary. I hope to G-d neither one of you are asking women the composition of her breasts.

Actually more than likely if I was curious I would come out and ask. Yeah I addressed people that way because making a comment like this:

Maybe you (as a man) wouldn't care if half of her body was basically non-existent as long as they had a functioning vagina. Most women would disagree that they want half of their body to be non-existent.

 

If what Kaylan said is a personal character attack then Red Robin's comment is. I consider what I am saying not mean but saying what I think if you are offended by it then you are very sensitive.

[Star Gazer]

If what Kaylan said is a personal character attack then Red Robin's comment is. I consider what I am saying not mean but saying what I think if you are offended by it then you are very sensitive.

 

You and I are clearly reading very different threads. I just cited a slew of his insults within this very thread for you, and I didn't even quote all of them... I got tired.

[RedRobin]

... and insulting my momma on top of that.

 

Where I come from, insulting one's momma is fightin' words. Telling ME I'm insulting my momma is even more rude.

[joystickd]

This isn't insulting??

 

Just a small sampling of a few posts, not all of them:

 

 

 

Yeah, he didn't just state "I prefer real breasts." His "opinion" is one big character attack.

I know there are many posts the men can point out where women like you have said the same things about the men on here that are the equivalent of what you "claim" is a personal attack. Here is the thing though if what he said offended you on here then don't respond to it on here. Why even waste the energy? I'm done with the argument with sensitive women. The world is harsh and if you get offended by that then I really feel sorry for you.

[joystickd]

... and insulting my momma on top of that.

 

Where I come from, insulting one's momma is fightin' words. Telling ME I'm insulting my momma is even more rude.

He didn't insult your mother. Come on:eek:

[BewitchedandBothered]

I have met someone I am digging. We've been a little bit intimate, enough where I am wondering if she has breast implants. I don't think I care, though I always told myself I did not like the way they looked (having never seen them other then on video, photos, etc). One of my buddies girlfriends had them, loved to show them, and I did not like it.

 

My opinion of them changed as the last girl I went out with had them, or at least I think she did, I never asked. I was never 100% into her, which is probably why I never asked, plus I did not want her to feel uncomfortable.

So, I am curious about the girl I am currently seeing, though I kind of do not want to know. I like her and I do not want her to feel uncomfortable; it's more curiosity. It's not a deal breaker either way; though I have to admit, if they are natural, wow!

 

I will admit I am a breast guy and I am very turned on by her breasts. It feels superficial to ask and there is a part of me that does not want to know. I also do not want her to feel uncomfortable with me asking.

 

Just curious, what has your experience been, men and women? Men, do you ask? Women, do you volunteer?

 

 

Thanks

You can definitely tell if it's an implant if you get busy, squeeze too hard and it flies out her mouth......Don't ask her;)

[Star Gazer]

I know there are many posts the men can point out where women like you have said the same things about the men on here that are the equivalent of what you "claim" is a personal attack.

 

Excuse me. Excuse me.

 

1. "Women like me have said the same things" about men? NO. NEVER have I ever said anything remotely close or similar.

 

2. Just because someone ELSE says insulting things, doesn't make it okay for Kaylan to say insulting things. Two wrongs do not make a might. Insulting things are insulting things, no matter who says it.

 

The fact that you cannot even admit that the things I quoted are in fact insulting, and you're dismissing them as me being "sensitive," speaks volumes.

 

Good luck in life, sir.