joystickd Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 I see everyone wanting this and that in a potential partner but honestly what do you offer to this potential person for them to see you as relationship material. On a multidating thread I ask an opponent of multidating about what did she have to offer to get a guy to want to stop multidating and all she could say was do it for courtesy. What is it about you that would actually have someone of the opposite sex spark interest in getting to know you? What is it about you that when you meet this person that has qualities you are looking for they would want to have something with you? Link to post Share on other sites
jobaba Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 I see everyone wanting this and that in a potential partner but honestly what do you offer to this potential person for them to see you as relationship material. On a multidating thread I ask an opponent of multidating about what did she have to offer to get a guy to want to stop multidating and all she could say was do it for courtesy. What is it about you that would actually have someone of the opposite sex spark interest in getting to know you? What is it about you that when you meet this person that has qualities you are looking for they would want to have something with you? Mostly stuff that women don't look for until AFTER they've picked a man if at all... -Loyalty -I treat a woman really well -Treat other people well -Humility Humor and intelligence are subjective but I've been told I'm funny and smart. In terms of the surficial stuff I have graduate level degrees from good schools and will soon have a 3rd. My career path is OK but I'll never be rich. My family is also fairly well off. But mostly the first stuff is what I'm looking for and what I expect people to appreciate in me. Link to post Share on other sites
wwwjd Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 I'll bite: Top 5 what women want/need: 1. affection [non sexual] 2. conversation 3. openness / honesty 4. financial support 5. family commitment 1. Plenty of nonsexual affection. (and sex of course but that is not always required.) PDA, cuddling, super long makeout sessions, hands holding, dancing, whatever - I'm in 2. Done. Easy. Great talker both shallow and deep 3. Done, again easy. Life is easier with honesty and no secrets. 4. Doing okay here - would make some gal happy, but I'm holding out until I can REALLY provide a great nest. 5. Definitly believe in "family" but not sure I can make the kids thing work due to life choices I have pursued.... so, in all honesty, that is my biggest fail in the "all encompassing" department. That and I have a long list of active extreme hobbies that scares some gals. One thing missing on that list is humor and is one of my stronger points. I feel humor is SOOO important in life.. to be able to laugh off some pointless things that come our way. Personally, good hygeine, good dresser, attentive, eye contact, concerned listener, CONTENTMENT, commitment, monogomous, some bad boy spice tossed in for good fun (none of the bad parts though) Other than income and kids, I'm a great catch. But, I'm not looking at the moment because I don't like wasting gals time. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
january2011 Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 My heart. [ten characters] 3 Link to post Share on other sites
wwwjd Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 My heart. [ten characters] awwww that's sweet. here is what WE really need: Top 5 what men want/need: 1. sexual fulfillment 2. recreational companionship 3. attractive spouse 4. domestic assistance 5. admiration *NEWVHZN notice attractive spouse is NOT #1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lil1 Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 What do you have to offer to the opposite sex? passion devotion loyalty humor security spontanaity intelligence respect unrequited love the best sex he's ever had!!:bunny: Link to post Share on other sites
jobaba Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 (edited) here is what WE really need: Top 5 what men want/need: 1. sexual fulfillment 2. recreational companionship 3. attractive spouse 4. domestic assistance 5. admiration LOL. That's not how my list would look at all. 1) Respect and loyalty 2) Kind and non-shallow 3) Ambition 4) Compatibility 5) Intelligence and humor The problem with these kinds of lists is just about everybody thinks they are kind, intelligent, and funny. Edited April 25, 2012 by jobaba Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 Average to above-average abdominals... 6 Link to post Share on other sites
wwwjd Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 LOL. That's not how my list would look at all. 1) Respect and loyalty 2) Kind and non-shallow 3) Ambition 4) Compatibility 5) Intelligence and humor The problem with these kinds of lists is just about everybody thinks they are kind, intelligent, and funny. fyi the lists I posted were from some multi-decade study by doctors, or someone in the know, not me. I forget the source, but it's out there someplace. And rings pretty accurate from what I see. Not that it is the END ALL list, just interesting and pretty true. Link to post Share on other sites
verhrzn Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 Sarcasm. Occasionally food and BJs. awwww that's sweet. here is what WE really need: Top 5 what men want/need: 1. sexual fulfillment 2. recreational companionship 3. attractive spouse 4. domestic assistance 5. admiration *NEWVHZN notice attractive spouse is NOT #1 Not sure who NewVhzn is, but OldVhzn says "Ooo gee, attraction spouse isn't #1, but 3! However, sexual fulfillment, which is directly tied to physical attractiveness, IS #1." So, point still stands. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
SJC2008 Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 In no particular order: 1. Loyalty 2. Passion 3. Support 4. Strength (Been through a lot and can handle almost anything) 5. Humor 6. Handy ( Auto and household repair) But I don't make them wet so none of that matters. Link to post Share on other sites
wwwjd Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 [forehead slap self!] the stuff I listed for me is ONLY knowing after taking the time to get to know me some. Maybe after a few weeks of time together, certainly not within three dates. Heck, within 3 dates she probably STILL knows nothing about me because I will have been buring her in so many questions about herself... Is the OP asking for the first sighting attraction offering? why would I stand out against the next person?? that is more visual than a depth thing.... did I misread the question? Link to post Share on other sites
Oxy Moronovich Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 I have nothing to offer the opposite sex. But she better offer me a hot body and easy sex in return. Link to post Share on other sites
threebyfate Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 Not really. If I were a guy, I'd be a short guy. Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 1. I am loyal to a fault. 2. My breasts are 36-H, natural 3. I went to cooking school and love to prepare and serve elaborate meals 4. I am sexually adventurous and voracious 5. I'm pretty smart... 6. I can be the perfect and cultured elegant date or a complete and total slut 7. High I.Q. means ever-interesting conversations on multiple subjects 8. As a trained slave, I will serve unquestioningly 9. I'm a good MacGyver in fixing whatever needs to get fixed 10. Resilient; I've been knocked down so many times and keep getting back up. 11. I actually enjoy ironing 12. Exuberant, erudite, effervescent, and epicurious. Link to post Share on other sites
verhrzn Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 1. I am loyal to a fault. 2. My breasts are 36-H, natural 3. I went to cooking school and love to prepare and serve elaborate meals 4. I am sexually adventurous and voracious 5. I'm pretty smart... 6. I can be the perfect and cultured elegant date or a complete and total slut 7. High I.Q. means ever-interesting conversations on multiple subjects 8. As a trained slave, I will serve unquestioningly 9. I'm a good MacGyver in fixing whatever needs to get fixed 10. Resilient; I've been knocked down so many times and keep getting back up. 11. I actually enjoy ironing 12. Exuberant, erudite, effervescent, and epicurious. Can't tell if trolling or perfect... *narrows eyes* Link to post Share on other sites
wwwjd Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 6. I can be the perfect and cultured elegant date or a complete and total slut I wish more people understood how this style of diversity (not just in sexuality) makes for a wonderfully entertaining life. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
gotye Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 I have a good body and a pretty good face I can carry a conversation about culture I am opinionated while still being respectful of others Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 Can't tell if trolling or perfect... *narrows eyes* No one is perfect... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
EasyHeart Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 It rhymes with "pliant bong". . . . Link to post Share on other sites
RiverRunning Posted April 25, 2012 Share Posted April 25, 2012 1. I'm loyal to the bitter end. I stayed with my first ex for about 1 1/2 years; more than a year of that for far too long. But I spent that year patiently: trying to talk to him, to get him to see things from my perspective (namely, he was bleeding me dry - with my money and my energy, carting his lazy butt around). I waited for some of the circumstances in his life to change. Inevitably I had to leave because he refused to work with me. Same with my second ex. After the 6 month mark, I spent 2 years being miserable because he was stubborn, stubborn, stubborn. And then I spent another year trying to recover from his damage after he saw the light, so to speak. 2. I'm very patient and even-tempered: I know how to 'fight' fairly. I can say I've never really had a 'fight' with a partner. Disagreements. I only recall yelling at my ex once - he kept pushing my buttons - in all the years we were together. 3. I'd like to say I'm nice and that I have a good sense of humor. 4. I have a broad spectrum of interests. I do enjoy going out to see movies, to clubs, museums, take kids in the family to the park, laser tagging, etc. I also like just curling up at home to watch T.V., play board games, work on a project together, play video games, read, etc. I tend to work well whether I'm dating guys who are outgoing or more reserved for that reason. 5. I'm not crazy. No, really. I often see this on profiles along with lines like "I'm not into drama," which usually means that if the person has to say it, it's a clear warning to run away because you've just encountered a psycho drama queen. But I really don't have the energy to be crazy. To snoop, accuse you of sleeping with someone out of the blue (if he's stumbling in late at all hours of the night, I'd be suspicious), destroy your stuff, cuss you out, etc. 6. I'll do all the housework. I did in my last relationship and didn't mind. When discussions came up about getting a house, I even vowed to do the yardwork. Why? Good work-out and I enjoy moving. 7. I'm resourceful. I've never had a 'legitimate' job since I graduated from college. I've been working for more than 2 years as a freelancer writer, working contract jobs for companies like Google, substitute teacher, etc., you name it. I've even managed to find several family members and friends jobs (and nothing minimum wage) after they got fired or laid off. 8. I'm told I'm reasonably attractive. I'm not the hottest woman ever but realistically, I'm not a troll, even if I feel I am. 9. I can pamper my boyfriends. To some extent. I know, I know, male ego and all that. But some of my best memories involve bringing over dinner (or cooking dinner) for a sick boyfriend, bringing him medicine, giving back massages, etc. Link to post Share on other sites
Author joystickd Posted April 25, 2012 Author Share Posted April 25, 2012 Sarcasm. Occasionally food and BJs. Not sure who NewVhzn is, but OldVhzn says "Ooo gee, attraction spouse isn't #1, but 3! However, sexual fulfillment, which is directly tied to physical attractiveness, IS #1." So, point still stands. I do want someone with sarcasm. I could careless about bjs. Link to post Share on other sites
wwwjd Posted April 28, 2012 Share Posted April 28, 2012 I could careless about bjs. Please return your man card immediately to: ManCard Return Processing 6969 E. Sprung St. Pueblo, Co 81010 1 Link to post Share on other sites
persevere Posted April 28, 2012 Share Posted April 28, 2012 I'm a solid, stable guy. Pretty intelligent, with a quick wit. Not prone to anger. Good job. Nice place. I'm devoted to her when in a relationship. Presentable to her friends, etc. Thoughtful and honest. I am generous. Tall dude. Not bad looking. Not arrogant, but confident. Resiliant and experienced in life. Responsible. On paper, I am like WTF...they should be all over me. I do, however, obsess a bit and sometimes don't play it as cool as I should when wanting to be with a woman. I am too eager, at times. I have trust issues, from allowing myself to be burned a few times in the past. Working on this. Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted April 28, 2012 Share Posted April 28, 2012 1. Reliable and loyal, never flake 2. Try to work out the other person to understand what they are about and what makes them tick in and out of bed 3. Not self centered and not a princess 4. I'm social and outgoing that means I do my best to get on with his friends 5. I'm independent therefore I like it when he is too, there is no 'checking in' when he is out with his mates but I'm happy to hear from him when he wants to call me. 6. Good career, own property 7. Have travelled lots and follow current affairs and politics daily, can hold a conversation of many subjects 8. I make an real effort to understand his hobbies whatever they are to fit into his life and vice versa 9. I keep in shape and love sex 10. Switch from lady in the streets to freak between the sheets 11. He can rely on my loyalty when sh*t hits the fan. Link to post Share on other sites
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