At what point is it cool to hang out with your ex as a friend?

[Standard-Fare]

I've always thought you can only successfully hang out with an ex when you're at the point where you can hear about them dating someone else and genuinely feel unthreatened by that and happy for them. Like, "Oh, cool, what's she like?"

 

Right now I'm considering trying to hang out with an ex of mine. We broke up about six months ago and it was hard, but I'm definitely over the pain and I'm not pining for him or anything like that. I'd like to know what's going on in his life because at the time of our breakup he was considering moving out of our city and pursuing other options this summer. I don't want to just find out he moved away months after the fact.

 

I proposed a baseball game because I thought it was a safe context... not too intimate, gives us an external focus, and little chance or pretense of a hookup. The ex agreed, and now we're narrowing down a date.

 

But when I dig deep inside I realize that I don't want to hear about it if he's dating someone. It would definitely hurt me. I don't want to date him again myself but I think I still harbor that feeling of connection, almost ownership, of this guy.

 

Does that mean I should just abandon this idea, and never follow through with him on committing to the baseball game?

[ThatDudeXO]

When you look in her eyes you don't feel any emotional or sexual feelings.

 

When you see her with another guy or being loved up about another guy.

 

When she tells you about an experience (possibly sexual) with another guy and it doesn't hurt you.

 

Certain relationship habits are hard to kill. You might find yourself awkward just ending the day out with just a hug, when you used to end it with a long kiss.

 

To be perfectly honest, I don't think you should...you need NOT to be hurt when you find out he's dating someone else but what do I know? My ex says she just wants to be friends but will be hurt if she sees me with someone else.