jopz Posted May 4, 2012 Share Posted May 4, 2012 Ever since I've posted here when I was little, I used to post little petty things, but hey...I was young and thats what kids do with relationships. "A girl likes them!!!!!!!! :p" Lets get obsessed and question everything! I feel like I have to swallow my pride with this one. Relationships ARE NOT my thing, not because I cannot handle them, but because I have NEVER had time for them and I've always been more partial to spending time with family and making money. For what its worth, I'm 20 now and this may sound REALLY corny, maybe even cringe worthy, but its been a semi big deal to me- and a semi-big deal now is = MINISCULE in any other relationship, trust me...I've gotten good to dumbing down problems. I'm always happy, I always see the bright side of things....ALWAYS. I'm not really Mad/Sad now, I'm confused. So here it goes (Taken from another site I posted it) This one girl I used to talk to in 6th grade basically fell in love with me (Trust me, I HATE...HATE, this romance sh*t) We had little crushes and hung out all through elementary, middle, high school, and at the end of high school things turned sour. Honestly, I think she felt that she lost her looks, lost a lot of weight, and isolated herself from many people. She was still as beautyful from day one, but since she was older she just had a different kind of pretty. I remember she stopped talking to me and would never answer, I had no idea why. I had a dream just 2 days ago (And she hadn't talked to me in ages before this) that I was in her home room (Which I was) and she was sitting there with everyone else. I KID YOU NOT, it was a direct flashback from the first time I walked into the homeroom and she was sitting next to me since we have the same last name. I cannot possibly explain how pretty this girl was for being so young. I remember being confused and being late to the class and being the only kid that got his homeroom mixed up. The strong feel of nostalgia I had when I woke up (And I still have it now) is insane. The dream was SO f***ing bittersweet that it makes me want to cry. I never...NEVER- E-V-E-R want a thing to with girls (Trying to get money and be stable, 20 now) but I feel like I could cry. I miss that moment of being there so much, and it scares me because it felt so real. I just can't put it into words. You need to understand, I wasn't too good looking up until 2 years ago, so this SMOKING hot girl dating a guy like me was mind blowing, but it showed she really liked me, some might even say love me (I know it sounds gay but I'm breaking my hard shell character for once) Now I contacted her and told her I wanna talk again, not to date her or be a nudge, but because a long time ago we were incredible friends. She texted me back a day later and thought long and hard about that text and she was ready to speak again. It turns out, she is moving, so I can't even see her when she is home from college...moving far away when it used to be 5 minutes away. I guess...I miss it is all. I miss being with her and seeing her so much that it actually seems surreal. I have never wanted to live in the past- I focus on the future, but this scenario is the exception of all exceptions. I wanna be back there with her. She lived minutes away and if I could have just matured a bit we would have hung out more. I don't know what else to say but I'm gonna miss her and it seems the chapter in my life with me and her was long, bitter sweet, but ending. Link to post Share on other sites
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